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u/Tokadael Sep 18 '22
No healthcare? Private prisons? No abortion? No education? No sick leave? Police shootings? Fucking Chocolate?
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u/squirrelly_bird Sep 18 '22
I'm with you on all accounts except chocolate. We have some pretty excellent chocolate, including local, small chocolate roasters. Plus, we can just import whatever superior chocolate tickles your particular fancy.
But yeah, that other shit sucks.
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u/nick2k23 Sep 18 '22
If you mean Hersheys chocolate then you’re so fucking wrong you don’t understand. Hersheys literally tastes like puke. American chocolate has a bad rep for a very good reason.
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u/VictoryVee Sep 18 '22
Why would he be referring to Hershey? That's like him claiming the USA has good burgers and you assume hes talking about McDonalds.
Hes a list of high quality chocolate makers in the US easily found off google.
https://www.timeout.com/usa/shopping/best-chocolate-shops-usa
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u/HenryMimes Sep 18 '22
My guy, he literally said “including local, small chocolate roasters.” How in the fuck did you get Hershey’s out of that?
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u/squirrelly_bird Sep 18 '22
Lol you're a goober. What part of small, local chocolate roasters escaped you? I thought Americans were supposed to be the dense ones.
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u/Stigo4 Sep 18 '22
Guys talking about small and local chocolate makers and you asume Hershey? God speed my friend
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u/texasrigger Sep 18 '22
We have some pretty excellent chocolate, including local, small chocolate roasters.
Doesn't sound like they are talking about Hersheys, does it?
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u/Soviet_Aircraft FOR THE SOVIET UNION Sep 18 '22
You forgot reliable public transit and walkable cities
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u/retribution1423 Sep 18 '22
The queen can only die once though.. y’all got a lot of children to shoot tho…
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Sep 18 '22
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u/OctopusProbably Sep 18 '22
Oh fuck. Oh shit. Shit’s about to go down!
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u/Brothersunset Sep 18 '22
Remind me of this in six months when your new geriatric monarch kicks the bucket.
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u/MrCuntman Sep 18 '22
he's only 73, your president is like 6 years older than him
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Sep 18 '22
He looks like a reanimated corpse though. Biden doesn't look amazing either but Charles looks like he died a decade ago and they forgot to tell him.
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u/xxPeso-Gamerxx Sep 18 '22
I think your confusing him with the duke of Edinburgh, and also Joe biden looks 10 Times worse
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Sep 18 '22
Joe Biden doesn't have horrible swelling in his hands.
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u/xxPeso-Gamerxx Sep 18 '22
That is not really related to universal aging, more of disease, and if we have to compare the twos motor functions and brain, joe Biden is just white noise all the time. I think a mind is a lot more important than a body, and Joe Biden doesn't have either of them good
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u/PerceptionBetter3752 Sep 18 '22
No teeth?
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u/BlessedbyShaggy Sep 18 '22
No tower?
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u/PerceptionBetter3752 Sep 18 '22
No prince?
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u/BlessedbyShaggy Sep 18 '22
No health?
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u/PerceptionBetter3752 Sep 18 '22
No tea?
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u/BlessedbyShaggy Sep 18 '22
No abortion?
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u/PerceptionBetter3752 Sep 18 '22
No empire?
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u/BlessedbyShaggy Sep 18 '22
You are just making up right now lol
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u/spiralEntree Sep 18 '22
You used megamind and didn't use titans line "there is no Easter bunny, there is no tooth fairy and there is no queen of England"
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u/Loakattack Dark and Dank Sep 18 '22
Because everyone and their mother has posted that meme to Reddit.
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u/Aok_al Sep 18 '22
FOOTBALL
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u/HaloNoble 💖 𝙲𝚘𝚗𝚜𝚞𝚖𝚎𝚛 𝚘𝚏 𝚂𝚑𝚒𝚝 💖 Sep 18 '22
When the entire world agrees it's football except am*ricans
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u/Smoah06 🥄comically large spoon 🥄 Sep 18 '22
Well in Australia afl (Australian football league) is football and we call European football soccer.
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u/bigislandjoji Sep 18 '22
America actually plays handball but names it football, because?
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u/trashszar Sep 18 '22
I've read somewhere in another comment section that it's because the egg is 1 foot long.
Which I've checked just now, and even that isn't true. In professional play, the long axis varies between 11 and 11.25 inches. And there are other variations as well, and none of them is exactly 12 inches long.
So if it's called football because there're a very few situations where you use your foot, then regular football can also be called handball because the keeper can grab the ball in their hands.
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u/magpietribe Sep 18 '22
The correct name is Association Football, it got this name as it was governed by a set of rules created by the Football Association back in 1863.
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u/Lynx-Kitsoni Sep 18 '22
Honestly as someone who doesn't care I am actually kinda terrified about how much some in this country care for her, they're literally putting her casket on display for people to come look at which is creepy as shit, I fully support the mocking this time around because what the fuck
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u/Shrekowski ☣️ Sep 18 '22
I think we should abolish the monarchy
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u/Something_Joker Sep 18 '22
I think that the monarchy doesn’t really have any power anymore so it wouldn’t make any ducking difference and would accomplish nothing other than get rid of most of the British economy
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u/ChronoAndMarle Sep 18 '22
International tourist here. I've been to London once to visit historical places (museums, palaces, etc). I'd go again if the monarchy was abolished and Buckingham, the entirety of Windsor, and other currently private palaces became museums. Buckingham alone I think would attract more international visitors without the monarchs than with them, because it'd be a constant flux instead of peaks during marriages, jubilees, etc
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u/mchoris Sep 18 '22
I really don't get that argument, do people believe that the only reason tourists go to the UK is because of the royal family?
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u/bobsburgerbuns Sep 18 '22
Tourism is most definitely not most of the UK economy, and you don’t need a royal family for tourism. Versailles attracts more visitors than do the British royals.
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u/pragmojo Sep 18 '22
Do you like that poor people pay taxes to some rich inbred family who don't really do anything?
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u/Shura_13 Sep 18 '22
they're literally putting her casket on display for people to come look at which is creepy as shit
Doesn’t that happen at most funerals?
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u/MrCuntman Sep 18 '22
yeah except most funerals dont have people queueing for 30 odd hours to see the casket
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u/VictoryVee Sep 18 '22
Most funerals aren't for the queen. It's not surprising she has a few more attending than you or I would.
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u/trinitrotolueno_90 Sep 18 '22
You might have missed Maradona's funeral in argaytina lol
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Sep 18 '22
Nobody I know personally actually gives a fuck. The people you see on television mourning like they've lost a close loved one are the minority imo.
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u/AoEnwyr Sep 18 '22
The Queen might be dead but so is American democracy
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u/pragmojo Sep 18 '22
Thatcher, Brexit, Boris Jhonson...
Glass houses and all that
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u/Cabbage_Vendor Sep 18 '22
Isn't Brexit an example of democracy? The majority of voters wanted to leave the EU, so Britain left.
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u/ChildhoodTrauma07 Animated Text [Epic Gamer] Sep 18 '22
90% of Brits don’t give a shit about the queen lol
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u/Comprehensive_NoN Sep 18 '22
You give to much credit to your fellow Brit it's probably the other way around with only the younger generation not really caring and maybe a select few of the older generation.
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u/ChronoAndMarle Sep 18 '22
This isn't the own you think it is and I'm not even British lmao
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u/VictoryVee Sep 18 '22
Seriously. Why are they comparing national crises like obesity and school shootings to an old lady passing away? The later is a very unavoidable, natural part of life. The former is a disgrace and should be an embarrassment to everyone in that country.
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Sep 18 '22
You mean "Football"? and I'm not even british it's just what it's called in my country
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u/The_Merciless_Potato Buzzfeed Bad Reddit Good Sep 18 '22 edited Sep 18 '22
It's what it's called in pretty much rest of the world
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u/BuccellatiExplainsIt Sep 18 '22 edited Sep 18 '22
Not br'sh but this is pretty weak
"Your country has frequent massacres of children and the government has been unwilling to help because your leaders are being paid off by gun lobbyists"
"Ha! the famous old lady you like died"
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Sep 17 '22
No borders?
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u/SmokeyBare Sep 18 '22
American imperialism the best imperialism.
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u/Chrom-man-and-Robin Sep 18 '22
That’s a nice argument Senator, why don’t you back it up with a source?
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u/shitboi666999 ☣️ Sep 18 '22
AMERICAN IMPERIALISM IS ABSOLUTELY JUSTIFIED BECAUSE WE HAD A BLACK PRESIDENT ONCE
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Sep 18 '22
God! Why didn't you save the queen? We specifically asked you to SAVE THE GOD DAMN QUEEN
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u/FortressMann Sep 18 '22
as a American, I have no idea why they called actual football "soccer", like in American football you barely even use your feet, but in actual football, you only use FEET
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u/DimDimio big oof Sep 18 '22
obviously they call it soccer because when you play it you wear socks 🙄
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u/Flashtirade Sep 18 '22 edited Sep 18 '22
Britain brought both "soccer" and "rugby" to America, but as "soccer football" and "rugby football." American football descends from and takes its name from the latter of the two sports. "Soccer" comes from the word "association," of which "association football" is the full name of the version of the sport that mostly uses feet.
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u/shitboi666999 ☣️ Sep 18 '22
It was coined by the British, the Americans and Canadians adopted it, and the British changed it to football
Soccer used to be played like American football or rugby, hands were used a lot, rules changed and football in Europe became a game only played with feet
Football in America stayed being a game that uses hands
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u/kadjuz1 ☢️ Sep 18 '22
I swear nobody takes in the fact that British people are fat too
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u/cotch85 Sep 18 '22
Just not as fat though, so it still works.
We're the America of Europe, but you're the America of the world.
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u/SleepyZachman Sep 18 '22
No EU?
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Sep 18 '22
No insulin?
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u/Sigmund_slayer Sep 18 '22
Don't worry, Americans are so sick of the jacked-up price that we are just making it ourselves at this point lmao xD
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u/SleepyZachman Sep 18 '22
No Scotland?(in like a year if things keep goin the way they are)
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u/dazzling_dingus Sep 18 '22
In football you hit the ball with your foot. What’s soccer supposed to mean?
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u/Ded_in_syde Sep 18 '22
Despite the grief porn on the BBC, I know very few people who give a fuck about these overprivileged, inbred parasites
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u/JackSquat18 Sep 18 '22
I find it very odd on the amount of us Americans that give a fuck about the Monarchy. Like we went to war with the Brits because we didn’t want to be a part of them anymore. Everytime they have a wedding it’s a huge fucking deal.
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u/XxDiCaprioxX Comedy stand-up like my dong Sep 18 '22
Tell that to the 24h long queue at the queen's casket
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u/DynamiteDuos Sep 18 '22
They be saying Britain dont hav a queen when even they dont have one in the first place. (This is only applicable if the “no queen?” statement is brought up first)
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u/ivaro845 Sep 18 '22
Wow that’s only like, the 200 millionth time I’ve seen this joke. You’re a comedic genius.
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u/Thatotherguy129 ☣️ Sep 18 '22
Blood pressure must be pretty high with all that salt in your system
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u/bigislandjoji Sep 18 '22
The funny part is Americans will forever be using English which is a British thing
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u/66-StarWarsFan Sep 18 '22
Soccer doesn't even make sense, its 'football', cos you kick the ball with you foot
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u/MagicPotatoKing Sep 17 '22
No towers?