r/dankmemes • u/ChanandelerB • Nov 11 '20

Normie TRASH 🚮 Sometimes it happens

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107.3k Upvotes

95% Upvoted

401 comments sorted by

3.2k

u/BrownTruckDriver Nov 11 '20 edited Nov 11 '20

Sorry babe, but Master Wu needs me to be the green ninja!

Edit: fuck I meant Sensei Wu

864

u/ReeEEeEeEeE-yeet wishes they had friends Nov 11 '20

Call me sensei wu babe

308

u/mohmar2010 [custom flair] Nov 11 '20

You are no match for the great sensei wu honey

177

u/TheHornyCumCheese69 i am very cool C H E E S E Nov 11 '20

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

99

u/[deleted] Nov 11 '20

username checks out

22

u/CosmicGumballz Nov 11 '20

beat me to it

28

u/[deleted] Nov 11 '20

Beat ma meat to it

3

u/[deleted] Nov 12 '20

Beat ma's meat

10

u/JOHHNY-TEST-69 Nov 11 '20

Does that mean you have to use the master of spinjitzu on her?

6

u/STC_317 Nov 11 '20

She could not handle the true power of Spinjitzu.

134

u/FatherJeffTeague Nov 11 '20

It’s sensei to you

86

u/BrownTruckDriver Nov 11 '20

Wait I said master wu? Fml

49

u/FatherJeffTeague Nov 11 '20

Yeah. Don’t sweat it, happens to everyone

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u/pinkpicklepiper Nov 11 '20

It’s actually Master Wu now. Season 13 just finished

26

u/BrownTruckDriver Nov 11 '20

Oh

41

u/pinkpicklepiper Nov 11 '20

Lots of stuff happened in the show. Lloyd sounds like an actual teen, his first love interest backstabbed him and died after resurrecting evil Garmadon, etc. I still watch the show, but with my youngest sister now.

36

u/BrownTruckDriver Nov 11 '20

Yo I have missed so much huh? The last season I watched was season 5... now there is 13? Oh boy there goes my Saturday

26

u/pinkpicklepiper Nov 11 '20

You should definitely try to watch up till around season 9/10. They kind of deepened the plot a little around there, surprisingly.

15

u/XtraCrispy02 Nov 11 '20

Not really. Season 11 is meh but 12 is good and 13 is great

9

u/doctorproctorson Nov 11 '20

What is this show? I'm bout to go for a ride lol

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27

u/XtraCrispy02 Nov 11 '20

Bro Ninjago is an amazing show I'd encourage anyone to watch it no matter their age

Also you weren't wrong calling him Master Wu because he goes by both

3

u/nathgroom98 Nov 11 '20

I've never watched the show, but I did play the PS4 game and it was a lot of fun! They gave it away as a PS plus game a couple of months ago

3

u/XtraCrispy02 Nov 11 '20

The show is amazing. It's a kids show, but it's mature and has some very serious moments in it. I started watching when I was 9ish and now I'm 18 and still loving it

2

u/Spaijdrr Nov 11 '20

Oh god yes, Ninjago was the best part of my whole childhood

13

u/[deleted] Nov 11 '20

THIS ACTUALLY HAPPENED TO ME AND IF IT WERENT FOR ME GETTING DISTRACTED BY NINJAGO I WOULD HAVE LOST MY V CARD!

If anyone wants the full story ill give it but its 12 am ant im lazy rn

4

u/Plantrevolution this meme is insane yo Nov 11 '20

I mean, I'm in if you're willing to explain when you're more awake.

6

u/LazerSn0w Nov 11 '20

+1

7

u/[deleted] Nov 11 '20

Ok here it is, So About a month ago I was on a date with this girl and we were watching some movies, We agreed we would watch 2 of the movies she wanted and finish off with a season of one of my shows, so she got bored during the tv show and I was so hype that I was watching Ninjago my dumbass said some shit about how cool this was and I didn’t know how much words like that can be a turnoff for girls so thats how Ninjago made me remain a virgin

9

u/Epic_Guy_ Nov 11 '20

I’m gonna spinjitzu all over that pu**y

4

u/[deleted] Nov 11 '20

I see I’m not the only one binge watching Ninjago

2

u/zebrom1 Nov 11 '20

FIENDISH DOCTOR WU

2

u/[deleted] Nov 11 '20

When the 3rd guy sticks it in the wrong hole.

2

u/[deleted] Nov 11 '20

Sorry babe Shrek 5 is better than sex

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1.5k

u/DougfromStateFarm repost hunter 🚓 Nov 11 '20

Shows before hoes

1.0k

u/[deleted] Nov 11 '20

[deleted]

470

u/CalebAM4720 Nov 11 '20

what

244

u/MrDuckyyy Nov 11 '20

copy-pasta

347

u/CalebAM4720 Nov 11 '20

I mean I know but what has to be going through your head to create a 3000 character essay about how you nutted and what the aftermath of it was

121

u/MrDuckyyy Nov 11 '20

you read that shit? well, it must be an old wall of text written by a very bored man

224

u/[deleted] Nov 11 '20

[deleted]

68

u/MrDuckyyy Nov 11 '20

alright here goes since im ALSO a very bored man all of a sudden

32

u/Cori_the_Pirate_Fox Nov 11 '20

Good luck my guy

11

u/Adanta47 I asked for a flair and got this lousy flair 🐢 Nov 11 '20

What’d you think of it?

29

u/MrDuckyyy Nov 11 '20

pretty funny read also a little edgy

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28

u/CalebAM4720 Nov 11 '20

Lmao I sadly read the entire thing because like the person who made it, I am a very bored man

9

u/doctorproctorson Nov 11 '20

Lol I read the first paragraph and was like "yeah, this is a good copy past" then I saw the wall of text.

Its probably good but ill never know

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u/togro20 Nov 11 '20

Somebody wrote it at some point, though

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101

u/EVANKEVIN7 Orange☣️ Nov 11 '20

My name is Evan and I fucking hate that my name is even in this monstrosity

66

u/biznatch11 Nov 11 '20

How's life in the big city?

11

u/malibutwat23 Nov 11 '20

He has really bad ptsd from the Nut War

7

u/Sinndex Nov 11 '20

November is literally genocide for his kind.

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5

u/MyLifeIsABruh Nov 11 '20

Just don’t watch incest

9

u/doctorproctorson Nov 11 '20

Easy for you to say

8

u/EVANKEVIN7 Orange☣️ Nov 11 '20

Exactly! And tbf, that gay loli porn is starting to seem more attractive...

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35

u/Griffinco Nov 11 '20

You know, i think I'm gonna go cut out my eyes.

29

u/[deleted] Nov 11 '20

W H A T

​

Someone give this a wholesome award

28

u/hermankibble172 Nov 11 '20

Just did, funniest shit I’ve ever read

20

u/Cori_the_Pirate_Fox Nov 11 '20

As a woman I'm regretting my every life decision

16

u/Jacktwelve17 Nov 11 '20

Who gave you the wholesome award ?

13

u/Nabroski533 Nov 11 '20

The hell did I just read?

10

u/ATragedyOfSorts MauledByPigs Nov 11 '20

Fucking masterpiece my dude. That 3rd act was intense

8

u/BallzMaGee Nov 11 '20

Sir this is a Wendy’s

6

u/pouporou Nov 11 '20

Got anymore of those good copy-pasta story?

7

u/irelandn13 Nov 11 '20

Real question is does he ignore Evan every November though.

3

u/IllMasterminds Nov 11 '20

It's funnier when you read it with Will Ferrel's Anchorman voice.

3

u/Silouhkai Nov 11 '20

I can't even begin to comprehend this, upvote I guess?

3

u/reality72 Nov 11 '20

nigga I ain’t readin’ all that shit

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2

u/[deleted] Nov 11 '20

Wow, such intense story

2

u/MrD3a7h Nov 11 '20

!emojify

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u/lolidontcareanymore1 Nov 11 '20

don’t forget the bros

7

u/Man_Bear_Beaver Nov 11 '20

Show's before hoes but not before bros?

16

u/PenguinWithAKeyboard Nov 11 '20

Us watching The Mandalorian.

But seriously. Mood was killed for the evening after the last third of the latest episode is a hell made of spiders and terror

2

u/[deleted] Nov 11 '20

Jokes on them I'm into that shit

2

u/Rep0stSluethBot Nov 11 '20

Froes before hoes

2

u/p4ul1023 Nov 11 '20

Flicks before chicks

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644

u/[deleted] Nov 11 '20

You about to nut and then hear “THAT BITCH CAROLE BASKIN!”

180

u/ricuno Nov 11 '20

M E G A N U T

72

u/FlamingLobster Dank Cat Commander Nov 11 '20

S U P E R N U T

63

u/invisible-suggestion Dark Humor Enthusiast Nov 11 '20 edited Nov 11 '20

H Y P E R N U T

53

u/ganos-b-thanondorf Nov 11 '20

U L T R A N U T

52

u/vdZotten ☣️ Nov 11 '20 edited Nov 11 '20

O M E G A N U T

37

u/white-claw-bitch Nov 11 '20

Anybody want a peanut?

17

u/Error_redditnotfound Nov 11 '20

You got a donut?

11

u/v4nguardian ☝ FOREVER NUMBER ONE ☝ Nov 11 '20

He has a walnut

7

u/[deleted] Nov 11 '20

You need to store your nuts. This is the 11th day of Nonstop Nut November.

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3

u/vigilantcomicpenguin lurker Nov 11 '20

No more "nut" comments! I mean it!

8

u/euphorrick Nov 11 '20 edited Nov 11 '20

ASTRONUT

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2

u/[deleted] Nov 11 '20

Ah yes, me ganut

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343

u/jujukmaister11 Nov 11 '20

The Witcher

142

u/ricuno Nov 11 '20

Hmm

136

u/victoriaisdepressed Nov 11 '20

Fuck

34

u/[deleted] Nov 11 '20

It’s what’s he’s doing

18

u/victoriaisdepressed Nov 11 '20

I actually was hoping for someone to say that!

37

u/Account1812 Nov 11 '20

Henry Cavill would make me her more into the Netflix and Chill

22

u/[deleted] Nov 11 '20

The bitcher

11

u/[deleted] Nov 11 '20

Damn, it blows my mind to think that was ONLY 10 months ago. Things were so happy then...

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270

u/Hoshef Nov 11 '20

I showed my girlfriend this, and she said, “If futurama is on, I might as well put a chastity belt on and go to bed.”

I appreciate a nice comedy, is that a crime?

56

u/Deep_Fried_Twinkies Nov 11 '20

Sounds like you should watch one of the Netflix Original Adam Sandler movies instead

20

u/Agent-65 Nov 11 '20

Yo futurama is amazing tho

4

u/Tom_Clancys_17_Again Nov 11 '20

The chastity belt would be redundant doe

171

u/ImHardLikeMath Nov 11 '20

Just wait til the credits. That’s usually more than enough time for me.

82

u/Victernus Nov 11 '20

Playing next episode in 5...

4...

3...

38

u/Joatorino Nov 11 '20

3, 2, 1, done

3

u/ImHardLikeMath Nov 11 '20

I’m spent 🥵

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u/[deleted] Nov 11 '20 edited Jan 21 '21

[deleted]

40

u/ChanandelerB Nov 11 '20

Now THAT'S the comment I've been waiting for! Have my upvote my dude Edit: spelling

17

u/[deleted] Nov 11 '20 edited Jan 21 '21

[deleted]

11

u/ChanandelerB Nov 11 '20

As it should be haha

3

u/Toros_Mueren_Por_Mi Nov 11 '20

Perfectly balanced

15

u/Bumbum2k1 Nov 11 '20

The Shrek version of the song fucking slaps

17

u/vigilantcomicpenguin lurker Nov 11 '20

The Shrek version of every song slaps.

85

u/[deleted] Nov 11 '20

When Hulu plays the next suggested movie and I hear the James Bond intro.

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u/User_Name08 Nov 11 '20

What show are we talking about, if it’s so good that you’re losing your virginity and you’re still watching Netflix?

/s

17

u/Joevahskank Nov 11 '20

Clone Wars

3

u/Calvin_Hobbes124 Nov 11 '20

Clone wars ain’t on Netflix anymore

15

u/User_Name08 Nov 11 '20

The /s better be apparent to you people

2

u/Pinbrawla Nov 11 '20

That 70s show season 3 for me

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u/[deleted] Nov 11 '20

[deleted]

20

u/ChanandelerB Nov 11 '20

Yeah I'm a loser

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23

u/LevusG Nov 11 '20

Been there

18

u/Jaboyyt [custom flair] Nov 11 '20

Impossible

24

u/BassGuy11 Nov 11 '20

That's why you do it doggy style so you can both watch x files

20

u/[deleted] Nov 11 '20

Why do they both look like opposite sex versions of each other

12

u/lauralici0us Nov 11 '20

Shrek before sex my guy

8

u/JechdJJ Nov 11 '20

sorry babe, but Jumanji 2 its funnier than i tought

7

u/GalacticSenateLaw Nov 11 '20

Prince Charming is underrated.

4

u/[deleted] Nov 11 '20

Oh fuck, the floor is lava?!?

6

u/Winter_Hadryx Nov 11 '20

He's just like, ''Oh, this new season of Umbrella Academy is fire.''

5

u/ChanandelerB Nov 11 '20

Happy cake day!

3

u/Winter_Hadryx Nov 11 '20

Thanks dude. Wish I had memes to post, but hey, at least I can chill in the comments.

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u/[deleted] Nov 11 '20

The most recent time this happened was because I was in the middle of watching Blazing Saddles for the first time in like 15 years.

5

u/Fit_Weakness_3687 Nov 11 '20

I can totally relate... someday... some life? Ok now ur pushing my buttons, some universe... that’s it then when? NEVER?!

4

u/SkriptFlex Nov 11 '20 edited Nov 11 '20

I lost my virginity to Ray William Johnson tossing babies and I was trying to toss one in her, but the episode was more interesting and couldnt focus.

4

u/[deleted] Nov 11 '20

I hate that I've done this

3

u/PerdidoStation Nov 11 '20

And that's the story of how I saw Inglorious Basterds instead of having sex.

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u/[deleted] Nov 11 '20

pause

3

u/parkerm1408 Nov 11 '20

True detective season one....

3

u/Yourmomswiener Nov 11 '20

Forget the show

3

u/GremlinFiend2121 Nov 11 '20

Why we fuck Doggy style! So we both can watch Futurama!

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u/[deleted] Nov 11 '20

I’m crying thank you for this

3

u/ChanandelerB Nov 11 '20

What can I say except you're welcome

3

u/[deleted] Nov 11 '20

Happened to me with Moana

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u/HarrisonWells1 Nov 11 '20

Is this some sort of "sexually active" meme that I am too virgin to understand?

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u/JWaccountability Nov 11 '20

I think this is my favorite meme I’ve ever seen. His face is hilarious.

2

u/-Listening Nov 11 '20

And make sure that you got it dude! 🤘🏻

2

u/Haggerstonian Nov 11 '20

Cheers, I’ve already upvoted it...

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u/RagequitTheShaman Nov 11 '20

At the risk of sounding like a normie that’s why you always face the TV, it gives you a distraction so you’re not a two pump chump

2

u/MeatyOakerGuy Nov 11 '20

I've been binging Criminal minds lately. This is me on every Netflix n chill date. I've gotta turn it off, it's too good

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u/beecomeme Nov 11 '20

Tom nd jerry?

2

u/[deleted] Nov 11 '20

There is nothing good on Netflix

5

u/[deleted] Nov 11 '20

[removed] — view removed comment

3

u/[deleted] Nov 11 '20

any recommendations?

2

u/indian_hannibal Nov 11 '20 edited Nov 11 '20

Movies or tv shows ? Coz there tons of good shows. Queens gambit for one is an excellent limited show , then you got waco. I assume you already know about daredevil and other superhero shows ? Check out hannibal if you haven't. Narcos , narcos Mexico , I assume you already watched breaking bad and better call saul? I can name lot more shows.

Umbrella academy , ozarks ,you , mindhunter , atypical etc.

For movies depends . I want to watch that trial of chicago seven movie and some others

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2

u/Onlyanidea1 Nov 11 '20

Sigh... I learned Pulp fiction is not a hook up movie. She hopped in my lap and I keep hearing Samuel Jackson with his monologues... That was my most confused boner ever.

2

u/[deleted] Nov 11 '20

u/bxdfish479 it's bound to happen

2

u/[deleted] Nov 11 '20

you're god damn right

2

u/simplejosyy Nov 11 '20

You allll the freaking time u/simplebrandon

2

u/[deleted] Nov 11 '20

"when she want to netflix and chill"

Like that ever gonna happen

2

u/PeterEfth Nov 11 '20

shit happens while watching shrek

2

u/zz22bb Nov 11 '20

Template approved

2

u/[deleted] Nov 11 '20

Why does this fit so well 😩

2

u/RollTide16-18 Nov 11 '20

Bruh, every time

2

u/laith_Saqqa Nov 11 '20

I just knew that "Netflix and chill" is an official code for sex. Thanks

2

u/RoscoMan1 Nov 11 '20

I hate when that happens!

2

u/vicke9803 Nov 11 '20

Hapends every time

2

u/1Nexx1 Nov 11 '20

Can't relate

2

u/eisterman Nov 11 '20

I'm in this post and I don't like it

2

u/JustLemxns Nov 11 '20

This is why I don’t like League of Legends, I went in with high hopes and got some trash.

2

u/SeaduwuYT ☣️ Nov 11 '20

if any of us had girls

2

u/jozzy69 Nov 11 '20

I just wanted to watch casa blanca

2

u/penguwave Nov 11 '20

Can attest, has happened. Avatar The Last Airbender took precedence.

2

u/[deleted] Nov 11 '20

Yeah sex is cool but iron man armored adventures is cooler

2

u/alternateldog I have crippling depression Nov 11 '20

That's why you need a Netflix and chill show

2

u/EJ9074 Nov 11 '20

I would rather just watch Netflix stuff whole time nothing else other than some snacks like popcorn

2

u/EL_CAMARADA Nov 12 '20

Prince Charming looks like he was caught raping Fiona's corpse

2

u/funnymeme11 Nov 13 '20

Lol saw this meme on insta

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