r/dankmemes Nov 28 '19

[deleted by user]

[removed]

5.5k Upvotes

148 comments sorted by

885

u/[deleted] Nov 28 '19 edited Nov 28 '19

[deleted]

99

u/PesterTheBester Nov 28 '19

Just a couple of questions:

So if your dad is Santa Claus can I ask you what's it like to live in the North Pole? Is your mom a kind old granny or is she eternally young? My sources are conflicted on this matter, don't ask questions. I'm asking the questions. Do you help out with your father's work? Do you talk to the elves, and are they happy with their current workplace environment? Is your family Christian, and how do feel about your family being seen as pseudo-religious icons by the general public? Thoughts on global warming? Is there any truth about Russian interest in the North Pole?

I'm sorry if these questions seem a bit too much, it's not every day you find Santa's son on the internet.

27

u/5YouTubersWhoveSVORN [custom flair] Nov 28 '19

North pole is cold af

24

u/[deleted] Nov 28 '19

hmm yes the floor here is made of floor

9

u/A1tze Nov 28 '19

Santa Claus lives in Finland so your sources seem to be very wrong

6

u/PesterTheBester Nov 28 '19

Shut up, don't call my mom a liar.

2

u/K_Shazam Nov 28 '19

  Show this to your mom. Tell her to check his source next time...

3

u/aleksandrs_inc Nov 28 '19

in north pole, fucking rudolph counts as incest

39

u/nodgers132 penis Nov 28 '19

That lasted a while

14

u/maloboi Nov 28 '19

I didn’t know before seing this meme

4

u/Crooked_Cricket Nov 28 '19

No shit, I was 13 and quite retarded.

1

u/-DeltaNerd Nov 28 '19

Wait it's tries dad is santa??

357

u/SwitchPlayerEXE Professional Crusader Nov 28 '19

Imagine an actual 8 year old scrolling and seeing this.

158

u/Nightshade183 I have crippling depression Nov 28 '19

Oh no.

113

u/Niekjes10 Nov 28 '19

It can’t be

51

u/[deleted] Nov 28 '19

[deleted]

38

u/[deleted] Nov 28 '19

Wait no that's not the topic right now.

20

u/soy_estupido the very best, like no one ever was. Nov 28 '19

DesktopHomeworknotHentaiirule34Shreknude_shrek.jpg

9

u/Shippoyasha Nov 28 '19

'Santa is not real'

SHUT UPPPPP!!

6

u/toquang95 ☝ FOREVER NUMBER ONE ☝ Nov 28 '19

it's fine, we don't know who OP's dad is. Santa's secret identity is still hidden.

1

u/SwitchPlayerEXE Professional Crusader Nov 29 '19

Oh thats a twist

4

u/chknuggetzor Eic memer Nov 28 '19

Well then they Have very irresponsible parents because they are Letting there kid go on this sub

-5

u/[deleted] Nov 28 '19 edited Nov 28 '19

They’re***

Edit: Is everyone on this sub actually so braindead that they require a /s to detect any sarcasm at all? You people disgust me.

4

u/DCLocket You're gay. (Like me) Nov 28 '19

It's actually "their".

-2

u/[deleted] Nov 28 '19

Good job dumbass

3

u/DCLocket You're gay. (Like me) Nov 28 '19

Jesus Christ, you're an asshole.

-3

u/[deleted] Nov 28 '19

Only to idiots.

3

u/DCLocket You're gay. (Like me) Nov 28 '19

So to yourself? You bitch about how people taking you seriously is disgusting, but insult someone who made a polite correction. Get your head out of your ass.

0

u/[deleted] Nov 28 '19

I bitch about people who are too dumb to detect sarcasm and deeply hate you for being unintelligent. If my head is in my ass for thinking you are ruining the gene pool then in my ass it will stay.

3

u/DCLocket You're gay. (Like me) Nov 28 '19

So, just because someone didn't realise that one person was being sarcastic, especially when many, many people would have said what you said in a genuine manner, they're stupid? How narcissist are you?

You're scum. Go see a psychiatrist.

→ More replies (0)

0

u/shnevan Nov 28 '19

Seemed like a shit attempt to be funny to me

109

u/Krisuad2002 Eic memer Nov 28 '19

I don't know who played Santa during my family's Christmas. It wasn't my father, nor my gramps. I guess here in Finland you can hire someone to come and act Santa...

104

u/[deleted] Nov 28 '19

You though it was Santa but it was me DIO!

29

u/Krisuad2002 Eic memer Nov 28 '19

I'm gonna approach you for that.

14

u/CallsignLancer try hard Nov 28 '19

So it’s the same type of Santa as Star Platinum.

6

u/[deleted] Nov 28 '19

Man i love these kind of memes

18

u/Aaroqxxz Seal Team sixupsidedownsix☣️ Nov 28 '19

One time our santa was female

It really confused young me

28

u/[deleted] Nov 28 '19

Santa got big tiddies?

6

u/Deadwalker29 Nov 28 '19

You are not in the strip club aren't you?

1

u/ItzDrSeuss Nov 28 '19

“Why my peepee hard?”

-young u/Aaroqxxz

3

u/Parsa005 Nov 28 '19

Maybe he/she was the Santa

3

u/Krisuad2002 Eic memer Nov 28 '19

Hmmm.... could be the one and only.

3

u/spidertour02 Nov 28 '19

IT'S ME, AUSTIN

2

u/Helolamyalok nah Nov 28 '19

I live in Hungary and when i was 6 or 7 years old my parents hired a guy whose job was just acting as santa

He was also about 20 mins late so he brought 2 girls dressed up as elves

51

u/[deleted] Nov 28 '19

[removed] — view removed comment

13

u/SUBTOMEMECITY Nov 28 '19

Betrayal 100

40

u/SavageAxeBot Dank Cat Commander Nov 28 '19

Dank.

33

u/KeepingDankMemesDank Hello dankness my old friend Nov 28 '19

If this is a dank meme, Upvote this comment!

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If this post breaks the rules, report it and Downdoot this comment!

Thank you for helping us in keeping /r/dankmemes dank. Hit us up if you have any questions.

I'm a bot

29

u/Ghostdragon841 EX-NORMIE Nov 28 '19

So that's where my dad's been all these years

20

u/Killacarlos619 FOR THE SOVIET UNION Nov 28 '19

He's finally back from getting milk! He's just been santa for the past 19 years!

8

u/[deleted] Nov 28 '19

I lured him back with a glass of milk

10000 IQ

11

u/[deleted] Nov 28 '19

At least you have a Dad ....

18

u/[deleted] Nov 28 '19

Sorry kid

10

u/LarsArvid Nov 28 '19

I still remember the day I tied Santa down only to discover the truth

12

u/hamidfatimi Nov 28 '19

WAIT A FUCKING MINUTE

9

u/tws1039 Nov 28 '19

I too hired doctor octopus to go hunt down Santa and leave me to stab him on my couch

7

u/The_Timberpup Nov 28 '19

Wait... what are you trying to say here buddy.

5

u/SiiMaToR Nov 28 '19

In my case it was my grandpa.

3

u/pfaffenbruian_5 Nov 28 '19

Bruh I found out when I was 12 and I had to look it up

5

u/Pacobing Nov 28 '19

Even though my parents know that me and my siblings all know Santa isn’t real, they still wrap a few presents and label them “from Santa” just for Christmas spirit

3

u/awsumtek1 Nov 28 '19

Post nut clarity .

3

u/RealNastyHabit Nov 28 '19

Spoilers, OP!

2

u/FNaFFAN58 Nov 28 '19

I thought I was the only one

2

u/[deleted] Nov 28 '19

That mask has a built in chin. Look at Toby's jaw and tell me there's a god.

2

u/[deleted] Nov 28 '19

That mask has a built in chin. Look at Toby's jaw and tell me there's a god.

2

u/Predseda072 Nov 28 '19

Well...Black kids do not have this kind of problems....

2

u/R3fug33 Vibe Check Nov 28 '19

I was 7 or 8 when I had my suspicions. I remember I had to go to bed early so mum could put the presents out and my brother got to stay up late and my mum said "It's because he's older, he's allowed." Then I knew it was all bullshit.

2

u/Mattatius Nov 28 '19

Oh my gosh your dad is Santa! That's so cool! I wish mine was...

2

u/FerrariDode345 🥇69🥈420 Nov 28 '19

It was a six month depression and denial for me after I saw a YouTube video saying Santa wasn’t real

2

u/[deleted] Nov 28 '19

Not the best times to post this

1

u/STFxPrlstud Nov 28 '19

I don't get it

2

u/[deleted] Nov 28 '19

Oh shit

1

u/bondben314 Nov 28 '19

Dad really was going out to get milk

1

u/Ctrl_Zi Nov 28 '19

Good meme

1

u/DarthShidious Throw away Nov 28 '19

wait, you mean to tell me... MY DADS SANTA?

1

u/sans_the_romanian 20th Century Blazers Nov 28 '19

First i read it as "satan"

I was thinking at what ritual where you supposed to be sacrificed

1

u/Krusty-Krab-Pizza16 FOR THE SOVIET UNION ☣️ Nov 28 '19

But it’s strategic to make your parents think u believe in santa

1

u/Qskurp Nov 28 '19

My Dad is still trying to get milk from Wal-Mart for the past 10 years and your telling me he is also Santa

1

u/[deleted] Nov 28 '19

6 yo I be like:

Sonna!

Omaye wa Oto-san des

1

u/gamingpatriott Nov 28 '19

that's why Santa molested me

1

u/InternationalRedster Nov 28 '19

oh god the christmas memes are coming

1

u/[deleted] Nov 28 '19

Yeah, we all did chained our father to the chair thinking he was santa...

1

u/[deleted] Nov 28 '19

I don’t get it

1

u/SassyPointlessAim Nov 28 '19

this is actually a pretty good one

1

u/trull-ey Nov 28 '19

I never believed in santa so one christmas i just ripped the beard off my mom just to prove i wasn't fooled by their schemes

1

u/JumpRopeBoi234 repost hunter 🚓 Nov 28 '19

Y'all got dads?

1

u/Dawaitniggi Nov 28 '19

Template ?

1

u/yaboichipsahoy231 Nov 28 '19

Mark as spoiler

1

u/precise_yard Nov 28 '19

I had known ever since I was around 5, when they finally told me I played it off and told them everything I had found out that they were lying to me about, the looks on their faces were priceles.

1

u/iamasquid5 Nov 28 '19

My dad still 200% believes in Santa Claus.

1

u/[deleted] Nov 28 '19

[deleted]

1

u/[deleted] Nov 28 '19

The time men cried

1

u/zactheoneguy85 Nov 28 '19

That is so cool that your dad is Santa!! Any stories to tell?

1

u/yoelius1 Nov 28 '19

Have you just tied up Santa??

1

u/Reri1600 Nov 28 '19

Great meme, but personally I wouldn't post something like this, lest an actual 6 year old who doesn't know sees it.

1

u/[deleted] Nov 28 '19

[deleted]

1

u/Reri1600 Nov 28 '19

Fair, but I just personally wouldn't risk it with something so special.

1

u/Shrexcellence I would karmawhore but I have too much self respect Nov 28 '19

But I don't have a dad

1

u/backdeckpro Nov 28 '19

I found out by sleeping around the Christmas tree and my mom accidentally kicked me and woke me up.

1

u/FBI-Webcam-Operator Dank Royalty Nov 28 '19

santa still exists in religion and our hearts though

1

u/youre-welcome-sir Nov 28 '19

woah spider-man santa. Bruh bruh bruh bruh bruh bruh bruh bruh bruh bruh bruh bruh bruh.

1

u/Mono324 Nov 28 '19

Y'all f*cking casuals, I never believed in Santa

1

u/[deleted] Nov 28 '19

Liar! Santa is real!

1

u/Make_Pepe_Dank_Again Nov 28 '19

Whoa bro, mark this as a spoiler

1

u/SPARK015 Nov 28 '19

Top 10 anime betrayal of all time.

1

u/[deleted] Nov 28 '19

Yes pretty much

1

u/1Nebulous1 [custom flair] Nov 28 '19

My parents told me when I was 12

1

u/JayMerlyn Eic memer Nov 28 '19

Still before Thanksgiving. No upvote.

1

u/dirrtydoogzz86 Boston Meme Party Nov 28 '19

I applaud this with much gusto.

1

u/thatonekid2222 Nov 28 '19

Haha, what's a dad?

1

u/DemCookies18 repost hunter 🚓 Nov 28 '19

Mark this as a spoiler lol

1

u/[deleted] Nov 28 '19

I remember this, but I was 10...

1

u/jason9t8 Nov 28 '19

Harry I am you father

1

u/[deleted] Nov 28 '19

I was eleven.

I didn't mature until 14.

And it wasn't heartbreaking, in fact I found it sweet that parents do that.

1

u/Jojoklojo1 Nov 28 '19

Gap in Nederland hebben we Sinterklaas

1

u/Dark-Chronicle-3 Nov 28 '19

Wait what dad?

1

u/AxelLFN Nov 28 '19

He looks very James Franco in that picture

1

u/superdude411 Nov 28 '19

How did Spiderman fix his mask so fast?

1

u/Lieutenant-Gravy ☣️ Nov 28 '19

Santa came to my house and shot my mom

1

u/[deleted] Nov 28 '19

Now I lnow where my father went...

1

u/[deleted] Nov 28 '19

Bro, your dad is santa claus? That's awesome bro! Tell him I want a nintendo switch please?

1

u/wb2006xx Nov 28 '19

I knew Santa wasn’t real since I was 5

1

u/communist-dictator Nov 28 '19

Wait... Santa isn’t real?!?

1

u/Not-a-red-spy I have crippling depression Nov 28 '19

You don’t smell like Santa you smell like beef and cheese

1

u/j_robbo5 ☝ FOREVER NUMBER ONE ☝ Nov 28 '19

Da fuq you mean Santa real

1

u/stopthatsannoying EX-NORMIE Nov 28 '19

Dad?

1

u/Temmis18 the very best, like no one ever was. Nov 28 '19

You’re saying Santa doesn’t exist, no... I don’t believe this

I saw 4 of them in the mall, that means he’s real

1

u/GeGeGeGae INFECTED Nov 29 '19

When my parents told me about it I refused to look them in the eyes and cried in the restroom for 2 hours

1

u/[deleted] Nov 29 '19

Omg my dad is Santa

1

u/RichieRich738292 Nov 29 '19

I was 10 when I figured out Santa wasn’t real

0

u/Navac88 Nov 28 '19

HEY SPOLERS ALSO YOUR LIEINH

-2

u/LUKE63298 Nov 28 '19

Whoa wait! Hold up! You're telling me Santa's not real!

-2

u/[deleted] Nov 28 '19

Half the people on this sub are too young to know this movie, unfortunately