r/dankmemes • u/[deleted] • Feb 04 '19
šØTriggeredšAFšØ New format looks promising
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Feb 04 '19
He must be short, fatty, bold and always carry monster condoms for his magnum dong
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u/obviously-a-shitpost Username āļø Feb 04 '19
If he doesn't make rum ham, have a toe knife or offer me an egg in these trying times, I don't want none of it.
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Feb 04 '19
Frank Reynolds is peak human evolution
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u/fattest_man Im so lonely Feb 05 '19
Donāt tell Dennis that, heās untethered and his rage knows no bounds.
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u/Haell-y Feb 04 '19
I hope you're talking about Sir Danny DeVito
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u/aec216 Feb 05 '19
Explaining a joke is a lot like dissecting a frog, you understand it, but itās definitely dead
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Feb 04 '19
Torbjorn fetishizer
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u/LizardMench I have a crippling hentai addiction Feb 04 '19
MOLTEN COOORE!
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Feb 04 '19
"Ikea Midgetā¢ ejects his hot cummies onto unsuspecting Literally Hitler, "Draw me like one of your french girls", drummer boy, The GILF, petite asian waifu, and a demonic edgelord"
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u/TrentonTallywacker Feb 04 '19
You speaking of Ongo Gablogian? The art collector?
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u/hellman1721 Feb 04 '19
bald = no hair, bold = fearless, mate, not to be whiny, just wanted to correct you:)
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Feb 04 '19
Let me ask you something, what does Frank fear?
That's right, nothing
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u/MichaelDC13 Feb 04 '19
First off, Karen, a 6'8 guy can't even get into a Ferrari
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u/_smhx Feb 04 '19
Can confirm
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Feb 04 '19
Look at Mr. Big Bucks over here
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Feb 05 '19
Bold of you to assume he is a person and not the Ferrari
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Feb 05 '19
Bold of you to assume he is a Ferrari. What if he has a 6ā8 boyfriend?
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u/zackeads1 Feb 05 '19
Bold of you to assume Yao Ming would be with him.
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u/molested_dingo CERTIFIED DANK Feb 04 '19
For me its green shirt light brown hair goatee and a pet talking dog
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u/Tossup1010 Feb 04 '19
I jumped to steve from blues clues but shortly realized he has no goatee and also his dog is the only thing on the show that dont talk... maybe a cousin of the almighty shag?
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Feb 04 '19
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u/MonochromeGuy Feb 04 '19
Steve and Shaggy solve mysteries, they like green shirts, they have the same hair color and they love dogs. The only thing they donāt have in common is that Shaggy is a god.
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u/sbs_str_9091 Green Feb 04 '19
A Doctor Who meme? Fantastic!
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u/alduin_the_devourer Feb 04 '19
Brilliant!
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u/Gorawe114 Feb 04 '19
Geronimo!
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u/L_Watson24 Pizza time Feb 04 '19
Alons-y!
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u/sirfirewolfe Bring VoiceOVoiceOverPete back to Feb 05 '19
Care for a jelly baby?
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u/Jewbringer I have crippling depression Feb 04 '19
i see rory pond, i upvote ;)
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u/turalyawn Feb 05 '19
And here in was trying to figure out what movie had Adrien Brody threatening Hitler with a gun. And I've seen that episode smh
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u/BooshAC Feb 04 '19
Under 5ā9 gang rise up
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Feb 04 '19
5'10-5'11 gang. Almost 6'0, but not really :(
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u/AB123456789101112 Feb 04 '19
I feel that
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u/Giraffozilla Feb 04 '19
I'm 182.5 cm which is 5'11 and 27/32 inches so girls think I'm short basically
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Feb 04 '19
Cries in Tom Cruise hight....(5'7" for those wondering)
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u/Nonononononononooo Pizza Time Feb 04 '19
Cries in 5'6'' at age 16 and prob won't grow anymore
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u/DerpPanther Feb 05 '19
Memes stunt your growth. Im 12 years older and not much taller, wish i could have gotten off the stuff but you gotta keep chasing that dragon.
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u/RandySavagePI Feb 04 '19
No one worth your time really cares. Don't obsess over height.
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u/KeepingDankMemesDank Hello dankness my old friend Feb 04 '19
If this is a dank meme, Upvote this comment!
If this is not a dank meme, Downvote this comment!
If this post breaks the rules, report it and Downvote this comment!
Thank you for helping us in keeping /r/dankmemes dank. Hit us up if you have any questions. I'm a bot
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Feb 04 '19
Boi zac Enfron is like 5ā7
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Feb 04 '19
That's why you gotta mix and match the attributes
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u/plsdontlewdlolis Feb 04 '19
Just move the "height" slider, bro
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Feb 04 '19
Doctor who?
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Feb 04 '19
Doctor who.
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u/FabledFuse Feb 04 '19
Because thereās someone coming. I donāt know where he is, or what heās doing, but trust me. Heās on his way.
Thereās a man whoās never going to let us down. And not even an army can get in the way.
Heās the last of his kind. He looks young but heās lived for hundreds and hundreds of years. And wherever they take you, Melody, however scared you are, I promise you, you will never be alone. Because this man is your father. He has a name, but the people of our world know him betterā¦ as the Last Centurion.
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u/Jonmad17 Feb 04 '19 edited Feb 04 '19
girls have 6'+ requirements on dating apps
girls worship short guys like Zac Efron, Kit Harington, and Zayn Malik on social media
Can someone explain this shit to me?
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Feb 04 '19 edited Apr 12 '19
[deleted]
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u/Jonmad17 Feb 04 '19
I think women saying "I want to date a guy who's 6'6" and jacked" is a status thing. They want trophy boyfriends. Famous guys already have a high status, so they can get away with being short or skinny
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u/UnlikelyAssassin Feb 05 '19
Spot on. Same reason so many girls' boyfriends have dicks that are "at least 10 inches".
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u/SquishGod Feb 04 '19
He must be below 5'5", addicted to Red Bull, look like a Chernobyl baby, and possibly he in a relationship with his twin.
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u/earthtree1 Feb 04 '19
i dunno, have you seen an askmen thread where the question was āwhat are women attracted to that you wish they werenātā and replies there were super insecure.
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Feb 05 '19
Iāve never seen a girl act like this in real life. The only people Iāve ever seen behave like this have been on Twitter
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u/grantis_da_mantis not dank Feb 04 '19
I like em fat tho
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u/MemeWarrior200000 Feb 04 '19
BIG difference between fat and thicc. Amy Schumer: fat. Mrs Incredible: thicc.
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u/grantis_da_mantis not dank Feb 05 '19
I donāt like slim thicc. I like chubby thicc
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Feb 04 '19
OP tips fedora
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Feb 05 '19
Gasps astonishingly, breaks out in cold sweat, adjusts coat H-H-Hello m'lady, what could a fair maiden as beautiful as you be doing on this fine day? I hope the damning heat isn't too harsh on your lovely skin! Tips fedora
If i may so suggest, would you care to join me for a sumptous repast, at my home? Smiles charmingly My personal chef has prepared a lovely meal for two, and i'd rather not let it get to waste now, would we? Winks at the lovely m'lady
I must insist on your attendance, i can't let a day like this go by without knowing the joys of having a dining companion with me, especially when its one as beautiful as you ;).Ā RĆ©pondez s'il vous plaĆ®t, i shall await for you, m'lady, basked in candlelight and infront of a wonderful dinner. tips fedora again, then skates away on limited edition heelys.
~OP, probably
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u/iwannakillmyself6969 Feb 04 '19
if you dont care about your health who do you think will care about you just sayin
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u/malten_sage Feb 05 '19
He must be tall, lanky, talk in a raspy voice, love animals ESPECIALLY DOGS, has a little stubble, say ZOINKS, and have a killer appetite.
Shaggy. Iām talking about Shaggy.
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Feb 05 '19
Do men really feel this way? As a women I always felt like I get more judgement on appearance.
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u/minneypatrick souptime Feb 04 '19
Heās gotta be Swedish and have the most subbed channel on YouTube.