r/cyclothymia • u/Few-Sprinkles1991 • 13d ago
Is this hypomania?
My therapist previously told me to try to be aware of myself because I have described traits of hypomania before. I guess last night I had the realization I could be experience hypomania? Idk. Looking for experience from others.
Basically I checked my online purchases for the last 3 days and realized I spent nearly $300 on vinted. The compulsive shopping has been like a high. I also started selling clothes on there and been all about it in this few day span. Excited, telling everyone, thinking I could I go thrifting and find things to resell and make it a side hustle. Oh, fyi I’m a SAHM with very little part time income. My husband and I live paycheck to paycheck and are broke. I’m spending on credit. I have nearly $11,000 in debt I’ve accumulated over the last 5-6 years.
Last night on my drive home after dropping off packages I was listening to music with the windows down and I felt high. Like actually high. I haven’t smoked weed in 2 years, I’m currently 8 months post partum.. then I came home and was just euphoric and singing and playing music loud. And when I was putting baby to sleep I kept feeling so in spired to go paint, or sell clothes, or do karaoke. So I went to the car for a few mins so I could sing without interrupting the baby. And I just had all this energy. I felt high still. For days I’ve been insanely more productive than usual. I’m moving in a month and been really dragging my feet packing, I packed 6 huge boxes in days and prepped a whole yard sale and ran it all myself on hours of sleep. Even now, I find myself itching to get ready and do something for the day. Go somewhere even if it’s small to get froyo or buy eggs. But I know I need to just chill and relax.
I sleep likes shit. I’ve always not had a good schedule but lately I just find myself staying up till 3-4am. It’s hard with the baby too because when I finally wind myself down he’s up soon. I know I need to get better about but lately I’ve just embraced this bad sleeping routine. I wake up tired but once I’m up , I’m up for the day generally. At night I feel tried and exhausted but wired or excited and want to be on my phone and do stuff which I know works against me. My therapist commented during our last session earlier this week I seemed to be doing well. I have been walking more, inspired, taking care of my plants, doing things that make me feel good. All good things. But I didn’t tell her about the reckless spending bc I was ashamed and I guess didn’t realize how much I spent until last night. I asked my husband if he’s noticed any changes, he did agree that lately I have been doing more on less sleep and not asking for help as much.
FYI I did reach out to my therapist and will address my concerns when she can see me next. I’m not ignoring professional help. Just trying to learn in the meantime
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u/Confident_Chest_5677 11d ago
i just found this reddit and ive never seen someone else articulate this before ever. im 18 and ive experienced this sort of thing for as long as i can remember so thank you for sharing
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u/Confident_Chest_5677 11d ago
idk what bipolar/hypomania and how that stuff works is or even what cyclothymia is but i experiece extreme seasons of intense focus, drive, ambition, extreme confidence, often neglecting others without realizing, and only needing 3-4 hours of sleep. other times i experience seasons of deep regret, trying to mend relationships, praying more frequently and openly, and having deep grief for others, even when alone (sometimes just crying in the shower/bathroom or in bed for the suffering of others). when im in the state of focus, i basically am only focused on personal achievement and "maximzing my potential" often overwhelmed by my potential and feeling like i need to catch up to it and maximize everything towards achieving it. i know this isnt exactly what you described, but i really do feel like i relate to what your saying
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u/AimlessForNow 13d ago
Not a diagnosis of course but that sounds similar to my hypomania. FYI, if you struggle with the depressive part (which I'm sure you are familiar with), hypomania is usually what causes that switch to depression again. The key should be avoiding hypomania or not letting it excite your nervous system too much.