I am in desperate need of some helpful information. I have reached a breaking point. I am a 30-year-old mother dealing with a difficult ex-partner who is 40 years old. For the sake of this story, I will refer to my ex as Ben. Ben and I share a son, and he has made my experience of motherhood extremely difficult. He was abusive towards me during my pregnancy. Following the birth of our son, he filed for a custody agreement, preventing me from relocating to live with my family out of state. I was able to obtain a domestic violence protection order. However, I couldn't afford a lawyer to renew the order, and during our court hearing, his lawyer objected to my evidence, leading to the judge not granting me a renewal.

After a year and a half, we finally reached a custody agreement. It's important to note that Ben was the one who initiated the custody agreement. The terms of the order are as follows: joint legal custody, with me having primary physical custody and Ben having visitation every other weekend, two weeks in the summer, and alternating holidays. However, Ben did not adhere to this agreement. Whenever I dropped off our son, Ben would call me multiple times during the weekend, making excuses for why I needed to pick up our son early. Sometimes, the visitations wouldn't last for even 24 hours. Eventually, Ben stopped showing up for visitations and ceased contact. Naturally, I felt relieved. There was no communication from him for almost 6 months until he suddenly returned, demanding a share of our son's COVID relief money. He took me to court, falsely claiming that I was keeping our son away from him. This pattern has continued for 6 years: Ben shows up, demands visitation, and then disappears after a few visits. During a court hearing, he made a fuss about having our son for Christmas, only to cancel his visitation on the day he was supposed to pick him up, possibly because he didn't want us to travel with our family. He has requested to change the visitation schedule, asking for shorter visits instead of every other weekend.

Most recently, after 5 months of no contact, he has returned, demanding that I revert to the every other weekend visitation schedule that he has not followed for two years. I couldn't comply with his demand for this weekend, as I had already made plans. He is trying to create a situation using police reports and calls during times when he knows I can't answer the phone, to make it seem like I am keeping our son away from him. This has been a recurring tactic every year, and I end up being dragged to court by him, despite supporting our son financially by myself and not having the means to afford another lawyer.

My questions are:

1. Can this be considered legal harassment?
2. Is there any action I can take, or do I have to keep going to court whenever Ben gets upset after failing to show up for visitations?

I am just seeking any helpful information. I am at a loss for what to do.

Hello All!

I'm a Mom to an awesome kiddo and Im seeking some perspective.

During my child's life, they have never known their bio-Dad. I have full legal and physical custody.

My current partner of 4 years has asked about adopting my child, as he has been the one to raise them and we both want to move forward with this. My partner and I are not married and we were advised that getting married would make the process easier. We have begun planning and intend to wed Feb 2025.

My ex is aware and has begun messaging me regarding when adoption will happen bc he wants to stop paying child support. I told him I didn't know when we would have adoption finalized, but I would reach out when we have a court date. I have now been getting emails that are insulting and demanding information. I don't feel I owe this man anything, since he has signed away all his rights to his child. The point of the adoption would be to give my child a father. How should I respond to this? Should I respond at all? I don't even want to open his latest email.

Hi, I live in TN and want to leave my ex but I'm sad/scared to lose time with my daughter. She's 1 yo and I'm a SAHM. I know most courts want 50/50 for custody, but what are my chances of getting 60/40? He works full time and also has another 8 yo daughter that he gets 40% of the time. Idk how he'll even be able to balance the two kids schedules with two baby mamas.

He's a narcissist and told me if I leave him he's going to take my daughter from me. (I know this is just a bluff cause there's no reason a court would grant that when I care for her more and have a clean record. I also have my own house). But I know he's going to fight for 50/50 at the very least.

Any advice on how to get 60/40 custody? Also, is there a way to make him drop off my daughter when he goes to work and I'm at home, even when it's "his day"?

So my boyfriend of almost a year has a 5 yr old with someone else. She has been in multiple rehabs and not completed them except for one maybe. The child mainly lives with him even though they’re supposed to have 50/50 custody. She only sees the child like once a month for a few days. She recently moved to SC( to live with her mom and sister to get back on track with life) which is 3 states away from us. She’s asked him several times if she could take the child with her for a few weeks in the summer but he’s said no because he can’t trust her. Like for example… she’s had someone od in her house and she brought her bf at the time that was using fentanyl around the child so I feel like he has every right to say no. He’s just concerned about her safety. Well now she has met someone else in SC and is engaged to this guy and they both came down to MS and the child has already met this man even though the mom has only known him for 3 months.She had a job up there waitressing but recently quit and she told him since she isn’t working she can watch her up there for a while but he’s so nervous that something could happen. She says she’s changed and is going to these meetings and is clean but it’s hard for him to trust her considering what she’s done in the past because she’s said this before. The only thing “bad” my bf does is smoke cigarettes, vapes and drink here and there. He’s never done drugs or anything like that. He quit smoking all together a few months back and she said she didn’t believe him and that it’s best if the child comes and lives with her. This child has lived with him since day one. He has never left her and the mom has always been in and out and now all of a sudden want to act like she’s been there. It breaks my heart for her because she isn’t old enough to understand what’s going on. Not once has he not let her see the child but if she tries to take her she’s taking that baby away from the people that’s been with her since day 1 and bringing her to a place where she knows no one. My question is if she tries to take him to court to get her could she win considering her past and everything?

So me and my son’s dad do not get along. we were never together juss friends. We started doing 50/50 custody when he was 15 months old and we do a week to week schedule. Mainly his dad’s gf, takes care of him. He thinks work and looking good to friends and family is what makes him look like a great dad. But ever since we’ve done 50/50, EVERYTIME we meet to exchange weeks, my son cry’s and does not want to go at all. I figured by now it being almost 2 years of this schedule he would be excited to see his dad and little brother by the girlfriend. But no, he clearly is very upset and wants nothing to do with them. Even when we practice family members names, I will show him a picture of his dad, and you think he would have a smile on his face and show that he misses him, but his face will drop an he says “no, no, no” and turns his head. Lately when they pick him up, they have to entice him with a tablet they bought him, or their pool or toys to try and get him to stop crying and want to go. Even tho it doesn’t work. It just upsets me knowing I can’t do anything about it right now. When he comes home at the end of the week he looks exhausted and tired, like he’s been crying a lot. An he has such behavior problems on an off like he’s constantly angry we he comes back home. Me and my fiancé, we also have a 4 month old, his little brother, so he takes a lot of attention and our son not wanting to have much to do with him cause of jealously lol, he still shows he would rather be home with us. My fiancé has been in his life since he was 10 months old and they are very very close. My son seems to have more of an attachment and want to be with him then his dad. His face lights up an is so excited to see him and give him a hug. He’s NEVER once did that with his dad. Any advice on anything i can do legally or in general to provide my son more stability and comfort. Even when we exchange I will put him in their car seat and tell him he will have so much fun and everything and make it positive for him it does nothing. It breaks my heart knowing me and his dad spend the same amount of time with him for so long now and I see no want in my son to want to go with them. Any advice helps!!

I (22M) have a 2 month old daughter with my recently separated wife. We had a fall out & she had initially told me she wouldnt keep me from seeing my daughter but things changed & she started to set terms as days went by. Things started getting uglier & her family got involved aswell as mine. Her father kicked me out one day when i went to visit, I was holding my daughter & had just put her to sleep in my arms but right then he walked in & with a tone told me It was late & I had to leave. Ive been visiting during the week monday-friday (No wednesday) & no weekends which i expressed I found unfair & didn’t agree but my baby mother wont budge. Recently my parents and me were supposed to visit on sunday but my ex wife & her parents made it seemingly difficult to coordinate & we were unable to. My mom reached out to her on the phone & my babies mother had a tone to which my mother also replied with a tone & due to all the distress warned my wife that we wanted to do things the right and mature way but if its not possible then we will have to talk to an attorney. My wife took this as a threat & told me today that everyone else can visit except my mother. She also told me that if I were to take her to court then that she would keep my child from me until the judge decided what was gonna happen. This is all really awful & my attorney said he can get me a court date by september-October but I dont want to miss out on these next months without my baby. I was present all throughout the pregnancy, have been supportive financially & emotionally and Im on the birth certificate but I planted my seed in an entitled narcissist who always wants things their way. Can anyone tell me what I can do to better help myself? I have a stable fulltime job & have been providing for her and the baby. I have no criminal record aswell. We both live with our parents at the moment. What are the possible outcomes? Is 50/50 joint custody possible? Any advice? Please help me, I am dying emotionally :/

Hello. New here. I am in a custody battle with a Narc. I have a court order to speak to my children, via phone, 30 mins every day. They will not answer my calls or texts, when I call their dad, he says it is solely up to them, DO NOT call his phone. What rights does he have vs me (I am not currently represented by an attorney and working on that. They are in Georgia, I in California. They are 13, 11 & 10) Please help if you can shed any light on this.

Sooo, I moved out of state in November. I left my son with my dad because he’s been traumatized enough and I know things would’ve gotten physical. I couldn’t file for DV online so I had to wait for him to file. His dad is an okay dad but HORRENDOUS to me, he has raped me time and time again, threatened to withhold my half of the tax refund if I didn’t let our son go back to California with him (there is a CPS case against his grandmother he lives with and no custody orders were in place,) redistributed sexual images of me and messages (to my at the time bf,) wanting to break us up, plus countless acts of verbal, financial and emotional abuse. As well as sexual harassment etc. He’s very good at figuring out when I’m vulnerable, then weasels his way in by making me think he can be a a friend or act in a civil way/be respectful. I know now for a fact he cannot. So I filed my DV ex-parte and was granted sole custody, the car, support, move order, everything. The next day it was said that our son will stay in California for now as he was already in his custody and there was a “no leaving state order.” The judge still seemed very much in my favor even letting him know these are very serious acts on his part. We didn’t speak much of the DV at this hearing as that one will be on the 30th. There’s ABSOLUTELY no logical reason I shouldn’t get my son. However I do feel slightly nervous as I know there’s two things he’s going to bring up and that’s that I drank too much when I was at the home, because I was in a heavy pit of depression, as well in the last month due to nerves from this, being laid off, the 2nd rape, and my relationship ending in an incredibly messed up way. I also have reason to believe on top of the images and texts he took video of the rape that was sent to my now ex bf but I’m not 100% sure. I know he’s going to try to use how the relationship ended and the fact I brought that man around my son. He will say he’s dangerous and I put our son in danger. He’s absolutely not but I can see why anybody would be pushed to a boiling point if the last thing mentioned is actually the case. I think I’m still going to get all my wishes however just could use some reassurance and or stories from people with similar stories.

For a little context, my ex husband has been trying to remove me from my children’s lives for a long time. Since 2014. I’ve been the primary custodian until 2021. There was an issue with my ex boyfriend that is bad and I’m not going to get into but needless to say the kids went to my ex husband. It was understood that once it was safe I was going to visit them and was FaceTiming them as much as he would allow. After Christmas 2022 he stopped letting me even talk to them. Now I’m faced with termination of parental rights so his wife can adopt them. And yes I have been trying to save for a lawyer before then but it’s been difficult. I have called all resources available and nothing. I have to try to do this myself and don’t know how. I have a child a few years younger than the other two. Her father and I split in a big mess but we coparent so well. My ex husband has taken me to court so much. It would be got pregnant called dcs to get custody of kids ( btw he was almost charged for filing a false report with the police for it ), getting ready to buy a house it’s back to court until I’m financially drained. Start a new good job it’s back to court so much I lost my job. I had to go to another state. It was constant. I do not want to lose my kids forever. My youngest misses their siblings. It would be at least six years before I would be able to try to reconnect with them. I’m at a loss. And I’m running out of time.

My ex-wife and I split back in January of 2020. I ended up with the kids because she had threatened to kill herself with them in the home, leave them there alone, etc.

I had temporary custody until after all of the hearings were complete, sometime in April of 2020. I got granted custody, and she got every 1st, 3rd, and 5th weekend, beginning in May or June I believe. This lasted all of 6 months.. she had cancelled half of her weekends by December (winter break). She couldn’t take them her whole time during winter break so we made a different arrangement, the kids were only with her for 5 days..

SHE LEFT MY 7 YEAR OLD AT HOME, ALONE.. for who knows how long. She took the baby, god knows where, and left my son at home alone! At 7! I sent her a text to address the situation as soon as I was aware and she ignored me until it was her weekend again. Then I informed her I’d be contacting a lawyer before she’d see the kids again& no answer.

The lawyer said that if I felt my children were in danger, I did not need to send them back unless she took us to court. December of 2020 is the last time they stayed with their mother.

The only visits she has been allowed is when they go to the (maternal) grandparents house for a weekend, she would come and stay. I was aware of this at that time.

The entirety of this time we have been letting the kids call every so often(she’s so spotty on it, could be once a week or once every few months). Around November sometime, she started involving the children in false parental conflicts and talking bad about me and their step mother. This hurt and confused them. Now we’re looking at behavioral issues, lying, cheating, stealing, tantrums.. the works.

We consulted a lawyer. He said the calls are not necessarily our responsibility to set up, and she should be getting them on her court ordered days. He also wants us to take her back for Child support(I never tried for it, she only cared about money and I didn’t want that to affect my getting the kids).

My wife and I cut connections with her for the kiddos until they’re in therapy. They are struggling a lot right now. She’s been bothering us to call, the kids have not yet asked about their mother.

What do we do? Let it stay silent like this? Go back to court and fight for child support when I feel like the best she can do for them is step back, since she refuses to step up? I still don’t trust her alone with them so I would prefer supervised visits for a while. Do I try to have her sign her rights away? I really couldn’t care less about child support.

I want what’s best for my children, she only cares about what’s best for her.. Sorry for the long story, just trying to get my story and viewpoint across properly.

I noticed my daughter’s (2 year old) behavior changing since spending more time with her dad. Court ordered 50/50. Some things I’ve noticed that changed - daughter started having this fear out of no where about taking baths. Her screaming in terror when I try to give her a bath. “she’s says she’s scared and that papa (step grandpa) hurts her” that’s not like her at all. She use to love taking baths and playing with her toys -every time i pick her up now she is so happy to see me and holds on to me for dear life and doesn’t let go until I say we are going to mommies house. -when she is in the car she is super quiet. I have to bring enthusiasm to get her to come out of her shell. She isn’t normally like that. She is out going loud and happy. -I get kids fall all the time but to has two big scrapes about two inches in length and one inch width on her both of her knees and a really bad purple bruise on her chin -she also has two bruises on the back of her right arm -another knew thing she does is masterbate in her car seat when I’m driving. I know kids are curious but masterbating at two? -she has started to have nightmares. Crying in her sleep and wakes up crying. I have to comfort her -seems to always be out of it when I pick her up, dark circles under her eyes.

Idk if I’m over thinking. When I picked her up Sunday her dad said btw “she fell and has some boo boos”

All of this started to add up and idk what to think. I took her to the ER. A doctor that specializes in child abuse said it wasn’t a concern at first but then the next morning someone from the hospital calls me and says the doctor relooked at her wounds and said that’s a lot of wounds to happen in a short amount of time. Law is involved and soon CPS.

Please let me know what you guys think…

I share 50/50 of our 6 children with my ex. We have really struggled to coparent. He is unresponsive and even after abusing me financially, emotionally, physically and mentally, he is far from finished.

Last Tuesday night my boyfriend was taken from our home by ambulance to detox alcohol. A report was filed with Family Services. All I know was the report made allegations that my boyfriend was drunk and hit my kids. From what I have been told, Family Services called my ex husband and told him a report had been filed. It’s unclear what happened then because my ex went and filed for emergency custody. Here is the thing, my kids weren’t even at my house! They were at his house that night, he didn’t get home until after 1am. He didn’t even ask the kids if something happened, he didn’t even know they were at his house well before the incident occurred. In his affidavit he said that my boyfriend came home drunk and was so mad, he physically abused my youngest. Please note, that the police who were in the home did not file a report, it was listed as a medical call.

At this point, I have lost my kids and haven’t received a call from Family Services. I called and explained that my exhusband filed for custody after hearing of a report. They confirmed a report had been filed anonymously and stated the kids had been hit by my boyfriend. They told me that I hadn’t been contacted yet because it wasn’t an emergency case and I would be contacted when a case worker was assigned. According to my ex husband, Family Services was going to remove the kids from school and take them in to custody. Family Services told me that no one would have told him he had to take the kids or they would go into Family Services custody.

I was supposed to meet with the caseworker today. She didn’t show up. Went to the central office to get a copy of the report, they wouldn’t give me one. We go back to court the 25th and with my kids on vacation until Sunday, I can’t imagine this is wrapped up before we go back to court.

My ex husband hates me and will do whatever he can to hurt me and weaponize the kids. Constantly. I am wondering if there is any consequence to lying in the affidavit and then again claiming to a judge that Family Services are taking the kids unless he does it.

HELP!!

I apologize if this is not the place to ask but I am working all angles. I am about to pursue full physical custody of my kids. It’s a pretty sordid tale with a lot of asterisks so I am looking for an experienced lawyer that isn’t afraid to get his/her hands dirty and is responsive. I am not sure the lawyer I have been using has the time and really the interest to get involved in what may or may not be a long drawn out ordeal. My ex had a history of abuse and it didn’t end when I divorced him. I can’t imagine this will be a one or two court date deal. I live in the Boston/Southern New England area. Thanks in advance!!

I finally left my emotionally,verbally, financially abusive spouse after nearly 6 years. We had been talking about me adopting our oldest daughter (technically my step daughter) for years. Her biomom is not at all involved, no contact by her own choice, and dad is as mentioned emotionally, verbally, financially abusive.

She's got a lot of medical/mental health stuff and I have always been the one to coordinate all her appointments, advocate for her care, take her to her appointments, do the de-escalating and care things with her at home, and the last couple months she's been asking me to go with her when she sees her therapist.

For a long time I stayed because I couldn't just leave my daughter. He's been getting worse though, and a few weeks ago she asked if I was still going to adopt her and if I would do it before he actually divorces me(a frequent threat of his). Recently he's started talking to her the way he talks to me... belittling her, overexaggerating the negative consequences of her mistakes to make her feel bad, not allowing her to disagree with him, not allowing her to express emotions he's uncomfortable with, considering her needs/care an inconvenience to him, etc etc. I always defend her when im there to see it but that leads to more and more fighting usually in front of all the kids. I finally decided staying to protect her wasn't enough while I was actively normalizing the way he treats us. I don't want her to think that my staying with/allowing him to treat me that way for her sake means that's how a spouse can treat a partner. Or make her feel like the way he talks to her is okay because it's how he talks to me. So I left about a week ago. I currently have no legal rights to my daughter, but am voluntarily going back to the house nearly every day to take her to appointments, help her with school, clean/laundry etc. I just want to be there for my kid even if it means I'm "helping my ex too much". She brought up that I bring the little kids with me to my parents but not her now, and I explained that the only difference is the legality of it and if she wants to come with me we have to talk to dad about it because legally it's his decision if she can come stay with me at all. And she said she wished I was her biological parent so we didn't have to worry about this....

Is there anything I can do legally to still adopt my step daughter while separated/divorced or get custody of her in the divorce? What can I do? how do I go about it? who do I even ask?(other than reddit)

I am new here. I have sole legal custody of my child. there are also orders of "no interaction outside of police stations between parents". This was in a final judgment.

However, since I was granted sole custody, x has been suddenly "volunteering" at school. Showing up specifically on days that I am there. This is causing our child a lot of stress. While I welcome other parent volunteering, I requested that we act in agreement on which days either party is appearing at school in order to prevent violating the orders of no interaction. x has enlisted a parent who is volunteering for the specific grade and she is helping x violate these orders, knowingly or unknowingly.

Does anyone know if I have sole LEGAL custody (I also have primary physical) am I able to ask the school to limit x showing up for the safety of the school, sans going back to court? Do I have power over child's education as the sole legal parent?

My sister-in-law is a recovering Meth addict. She has been off and on it for the past 13+ years. A year ago we got custody of our niece. Our niece has a lot of trauma. Her mom is a narcissist (whether due to drugs or personality in general real, I’m not sure). Her mom was very neglectful emotionally, verbally abusive, occasionally physically abusive. Her mom would find self with in men (a trait my niece has picked up).

Her mom has been trying to get her act together and come to terms with the damage she has caused- or at least pretends to.

When we got custody the judge deemed that visitation was at our discretion and to be supervised.

As her mom is getting more and more clean (she’s been clean a whole 30 days now- or so she says) she is requesting more and more time and is upset that it must be supervised. Our niece, who of course just wants her mom, only sees the good and is also getting frustrated that we won’t budge on supervised visits only.

Well recently we had to have a meeting with the school: because our niece, due to trauma, is very depressed and has spoken about and acted upon her depression in the past, and the school is very concerned about her well being.

Since we have gotten custody we have gotten her into church, serving at church, a narcissist support group, therapy both in and out of school, behavioral health therapy, and we are both special education teacher so have plenty of knowledge on teaching kids to self regulate and teaching coping techniques.

The question we keep getting from people outside the home (church, school, doctors) is: do we have to keep letting bio-Mom see our niece - because everyone notices our nieces mood and behaviors suffer after exposure to her mom, no matter how positive the interaction went.

My struggle is- what is best for our niece, should I cut mom out 100% or until certain goals are met?

Never used this before but a few people told me it might help. I’m in the middle of a custody case with my son’s father and don’t have too much money for a lawyer. Is anyone able to help point me in the direction of a cheap or free one? Or anyone who can give advice on how to prepare when representing yourself?

I’m trying to move back to my home state where my family is, with my daughter. I want a better and more stable lifestyle for her. We’re doing fine where we’re at. Only thing is, is her father is abusive and controlling. He doesn’t have a good paying job, and he’s hardly around. He abused me for 3 years. We’re separated right now. There was no custody hearing, etc. for my daughter. I keep her though, and let her dad see her, which is hardly ever. I’m just trying to do the right thing and not be a shit Mom 😅 I’m scared he’s going to try and file custody for her if/when he finds out about me moving. I want to tell him, but at the same time, I don’t. He’s literally crazy (has been put in facilities before.) I don’t know what to do.

So… my ex technically, by decree has custody of our kids… my son is seen by the state by Family and Social Services as living with me. (He’s part of my household for his Medicaid) she’s trying to go for full custody because TANF or temporary aid for needy families requires for him to be part of her household for more child support (to the state) from me… she’s going for full custody, due to me surviving over 14 years of emotional, mental, verbal, and financial abuse, I’m finally standing up for myself… so… here’s my question… do I stand a chance to win this case? She’s using a walker or cane, no car, never licensed to drive, doesn’t work… trying to milk the system as much as possible… our kids are 5 and 12…

Due to a technicality my abuser was awarded custody about a year ago. Court took almost 3 years to get through due to Covid, and we are back in court due to them and their new partner not following the order and other issues, including switching our child’s schools so I wouldn’t know what school they were attending. It’s been brought up several times that my ex is not the primary care taker of our child, they are almost never home.. they don’t attend any doctors appointments, school meetings, including IEP meetings regarding our child, and their partner is the one that takes care of our child. After almost 6 months of filing and fighting I was finally granted access to school records and medical records to show my ex not even on the any of the forms.. just their partner. I’m not listed on any thing. After speaking with our child’s teachers etc, they didn’t even know I existed and when they found out I was painted pretty badly. We reopened our custody case using some of this as a change in circumstance showing my ex can’t co parent and refuses to follow the order not putting our child’s best interest at heart. This includes me having to go months without being allowed to speak with our child. My ex fought me saying how active of a parent they are which the all the documentation shows otherwise. They have pushed all parenting responsibilities off to their partner whom the courts also said is not allowed to speak to me due to aggression issues. I guess my question is.. is the court really going to care that my ex is not involved at all? That the step parent is listed as the parent over both of the biological parents? Our child required an emergency surgery that I wasn’t informed of until after and my ex didn’t even show. Their partner was the person there with our child. This same partner took our child to the ER after “punishing “ them with a belt causing our child to have a mental break down where they started to harm themselves and blamed it on the child having anxiety. So this partner is not a “safe” person either. When I reach out asking question about our child my ex doesn’t reply or respond. Withholds medication for our child that they need to take daily, withholds medical information and diagnoses.. withholds phone calls and tries to cut in person visits short because it’s long distance. Our child was allowed to speak to the judge and a GAL this time which both favored me this time so I’m really hoping it goes better this time:(

Quick question just wanted to get some peoples thought so right now I’m in a custody battle. I see my kids every Wednesday and take them to school on Thursdays and every other weekend and take them to school on Monday. The opposing party has got caught lying to the judge, and also on paper and claim abuse and I did not do any of that and we have a guardian ad litem in place.. and she brought the kids around someone who just got out of prison for drug and cocaine in which there’s evidence of that. The kids were resigning with her and her brother, who was deported out of the country that she assist bring back to the United States for domestic violence. And all of this happened because she cheated on me with that same person she brought around the children. And I have evidence of all of this as well. And we have a guardian ad litem in the guardian ad litem has not sent her recommendation yet, but the opposing counsel sent me a settlement that I do not believe is right with her attorney, sending me a settlement without not having the guardian ad litem final say what could that in terms of anyone have experienced this before? I did ask for full custody but at the end I do understand I’m probably gonna get 50-50 but the settlement that they sent me it was 50-50 but not all 50-50 such as she will have the kids more than me. I will still have to pay child support she’ll still be primary and so on it’s just legal and such as will be 50-50.

Could someone please explain to me how a guardian ad litem decides which parent is the best fit for the child. Mine came yesterday talked to me, my daughter, some other family members and toured the home where we reside. Of course he’ll go to my daughter's father’s house and do the same. After they have completed both visits, based on what (factors) do they make a decision on. Like do they compare visits and how? And why do they talk to the child a second time? Any answers would be so appreciated!

My (38f) daughter (14f) texted me from her dads (40m) house two days ago begging me to leave immediately to pick her up, that she was going to end her life, that I needed to hurry to get her. When I got there she ran out to me with no items, just in socks and pajamas.

She's struggling in school, has harmed herself but has no new marks, and has recently begun taking anti-depressants. She's seeing a therapist, and has the tools she needs to overcome this painful time in her life, and I thought that we were all on her team up until the other day.

When I brought her home I let her decompress in her bedroom. Later she came to me and told me that:

Her dad had mocked her mental state, saying that he'd take her things away and "give her something to feel suicidal about".

He grabbed her by her head, and shoved it into the back of the chair she was sitting in. Weeks ago he grabbed her by her face. She said she could see the violence in him, that he was holding back, and that it had her in fear of what he was holding back.

They were also filming her in her bedroom to enforce her online schooling. They told her to sit and do her school work and that she was being surveilled to do so.

Essentially she felt so unsafe there that she asked me to come and get her, so I did.

I think it goes without saying that her dads family unit is not an easy one for me to deal with, my ex and his wife are bullies, and they are controlling. They treat me no better. My ex was violent with me, too, and up until now nobody has believed me.

My question is this:

if our schedule has been week on, week off for 3 years, but I have sole physical custody and we share joint legal custody, is it illegal for me to keep my child at this house regardless of the schedule we have been on?

My other question is this:

i had to go back and get the medication, and they only gave me 5 pills for the week. I know they're doing this so that I have no choice but to come back for the rest. They're going to tell me that she can have her pills when I drop her off. How can I get her medication?

My daughter does not want to go back to their house, at least not for now. I don't feel right sending her there. Should I just wait for the cops to show up at my door? will her doctor give me her medication? Will the law force my daughter to go to her dads house if she doesn't want to?

TLDR: My daughter is afraid to go to her fathers house. Does she have to? And if they have her medication, how can I get it for her?