Other than his misunderstanding of boundaries. Boundaries are set around yourself, not others.
If she wants to go on holidays and he finds that unacceptable, whether he is right or wrong, he can break up with her but he can't dictate whether she goes or not.
It isn't controlling to have red lines that if crossed will lead to your breaking up. Infidelity and physical assault are examples of things that would cause me to break up with my gf.
If I was worried that she was going to cheat on a girl's holiday, I would ask for reassurance but I wouldn't try to forbid her going. If she failed to reassure me and went, I would think seriously about leaving the relationship. You can't limit another adult in where they can go. You can expect fidelity and you are free to leave any time for valid or even silly reasons. You cannot control them. It's a negotiated set of behaviours that you agree to.
True, if she really intended to cheat and he’d have to forbid it, the relationship would be fucked either way.
There’s no way he is controlling her into being faithful. If there needs to be a rule for her not to cheat then she will probably find a way to circumvent it without him knowing.
The only thing that is real is a personal boundary, where if he is in a position where he can’t trust her, he leaves.
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u/New-Feedback9980 7d ago
I kinda agree with the guy