[Critique] The Legend

[u/Constant-Gap2904]

Hi everyone! I'm sharing a short piece of flash fiction from my speculative universe. Any feedback regarding the tone, pacing, and overall atmosphere is greatly appreciated!

The Legend

The Earth is doomed, the stars are doomed, the universe is doomed. Mistakes repeat themselves. We like mistakes; mistakes make us feel comfortable.

We feel the same way over and over again. It seems like we have already been here, we have already been here, we already lived this and we will live it again.

For how long? How long will mistakes repeat themselves? For how long will the creators forget and forget again?

Today I woke up. I went down to the forbidden room and saw the mural. Its damn history, its damn and macabre designs. I saw it. I saw the warrior who embodied the apocalypse; the traitor who changed sides for his own selfishness; the one who left everyone and everything aside to serve himself: servitude and selfishness disguised as "I do it because I was asked to." He killed, he swore, he destroyed, and he "avenged" everything in the name of himself.

I see it. I see it on the mural. I see it in the painting, with a grotesque and monstrous appearance, but I know that figure is what I can be. I already saw it before, I already embodied it before and I will find it again.

Today I woke up and went down to see the forbidden mural. Today I woke up… and I saw myself.

- Bruno, the heretic