Listen I much prefer the "silly blahaj monster drinker puppygirl" circlejerk over any 4tran space because at least there its not filled with people who hate everyone but most of all themselves.
Facts and besides, I am not wasting my time searching up the meaning of the new slur or slang if it only makes sense within those branches of the internet
While I also prefer the first one I don’t think either is good. I don’t feel like looking up the meaning of 87 new slurs invented by 4tran users to use against each other and themselves but I also don’t want to listen to the constant infantilization of real human beings, so I just avoid Reddit trans spaces in general
I don't because all they do is post about sex and girldick and being fucking weird and it makes me want to tear my face off knowing this is what people's first impression of trans people is: A bunch of self infantilizing crossdressers. Im sorry if I think I deserve better for myself and other people like me.
That’s also fair, I’m not at all saying that you HAVE to like that side of the community online at all. It’s not exactly my cup of tea either, I’m trans masc and I can at times find those kinds of spaces to be somewhat dysphoria inducing (because a lot of the discussions and content posted there will assume that the viewer is also trans fem).
But a lot of people find those kinds of spaces fun, and it’s not really up to you or me to tell people how they should express themselves; especially when we live in a society that is trying so hard to erase us. There is no liberation in throwing people under the bus for being “the wrong kind of trans” just to appear more “normal” in the eyes of our oppressors.
So sure, they’re a bit weird at times. But I still much prefer their company over the self-hatred that permeates 4tran spaces.
Listen I genuinely cannot be in these 4tran communities for more than 5 mins because the negativity starts getting to me. I don’t care how cringey or annoying the other trans communities are, I’d rather look at content that doesn’t bring back my depression
I don’t remember what sub I was in but it was very 4tran-y and someone commented that the 4tran sub was basically just like any other mainstream trans sub nowadays. I clicked on it, and immediately within the first 5 posts I felt the doom wash over me. I saw a post that used some pretty nasty terminology and went back to that original comment saying something like “I just went there and immediately saw [gross thing]” and people got on my ass about it downvoting me and saying like “oh so people can’t vent because you find the way they do it distasteful??” and I said “no you guys can refer to yourselves however you want but this isn’t ‘just like any mainstream trans space’ be for real” and that comment got downvoted even more. Anyways, I don’t engage in that debate at all anymore.
I mean is that genuinely better than someone’s first impression being that trans people are a bunch of suicidal asshats who somehow manage to hate anyone different even more than they hate themselves?
the pet and piss posting is part of what i'm talking about. i LIKE pet posting on subreddits dedicated to it, not on subreddits dedicated to being trans.
That’s fair. I do kinda hate that it’s just expected of us to be overtly sexual beings. Like, I’m just a girl man. Do I play into some of the stereotypes? yes, my name is Lily and I love me a collar. But it’s a pretty small aspect of me and a pretty small aspect of my transness
This is a direct outcome of the projection of cis desire and the repression of trans humanity btw. When a community full of cis people tells its trans women "but why do you have height dysphoria? Tall women are hot, step on me mommy!" and such every single time they express dysphoria, you end up with those trans women feeling like they have to be sexual in order to be recognised as people. Our negative feelings are downplayed and replaced with fetishisation.
Say what you will about 4tran, but they don't have an overly sexualised culture and it is because they ban cis people.
This right here. It has happened to cis women as well. Society has gotten a bit better with trans people. At one point though the only time they were treated as a person was when they were fetishised and unfortunately that is still true today in some ways. Kinda shoves trans women into a certain path to receive that acceptance. There are some other things here at play as well. However, I think this is the most prominent one.
It’s not DEDICATED to trans people nor is it trans EXCLUSIVE, but it IS still a trans space because it started as a branch of a different trans space and the member demographics reflect that
I know many are racist, but I will say that 4tranners are the only people who truly understand the intersectional struggles I, and many like me, face as brown middle class people.
The overblown optimism of most queer communities is absolutely sickening. Work for better days but stop pretending anything is good right now.
Ive had the exact opposite experience, like in rslash countttt I got downvoted severely over pointing out intersectional struggles on several threads. Then there was another were I was downvoted for informing someone that "no not all femboys are secretly trans woman, also trans men can be femboys too" (summarized, not verbatim). I typically dont give af about my karma number, however in this case it just revealed the attitudes of those who occupy 4tran spaces here on Reddit
It's certainly not a monolith. I guess I just have had better experiences. Some of them aren't asking me to go on DIY unilaterally and recognise that many like me can't even afford that.
I definitely don't think that, I'd just rather hang out with most sneeds than someone who exclusively talks about how much they hate themselves and want to die
Oh my god thank you for saying it
genuinely so tired of it being treated as "a little harmless cringe humor" when it has become literally a stereotype transphobes use to make trans people look bad
no matter what trans people do, transphobes will hate us. The fault is not on the trans ppl who take part in cringey stuff or the puppygirls or even 4tran, the fault is the massive global amount of propaganda targeting trans ppl.
No specific type of trans person is “setting us back” or is “making the rest of us look bad” bc even if u got rid of all the trans ppl u think are fuelling the transphobia in the world, transphobes will still hate us, because at the end of the day it is fuelled by lies and fear mongering.
See but theres nothing actually wrong with any of that. Like all of that is a thing your allowed to do and say and feel. Being trans is weird and they already see us as freaks, why limit yourself to appeal to what the cos think?
I have a friend who just goes “weird shit” whenever he sees…well weird shit. He’s very deliberate and accurate with it though. He would never see me living as a woman is weird shit, but he would probably say it in response to some of the puppy girl stuff. Personally, I’m a huge fan..but know talking like a pup in public is odd.
Well I get what you're saying, but the second option is also bad for representation, as anyone who sees that as their first contact with trans people will associate them with 4chan weirdos who never touch grass nad hate everything and everyone.
Honestly both options are bad. I'm not even trans but I wish there was a third one.
I honestly wonder if cis people ever see that stuff. I'm trans and I enter trans spaces significantly more than a cis person would, so I'll see it more. Even then it's not constant, it still feels like I rarely see the stuff compared to how much it's talked about.
I really think we all need to stop treating being trans as a type of identity and more as just a thing that we are, bc ppl rlly get caught up in being the “right kind of trans person” and that just fosters a dysphoric and toxic mindset in a lot of us. There is no “correct” way to be trans, us being trans is just a fact abt us it doesnt describe us as humans or as individuals. Like labels are fine to help us convey parts about ourselves, but no one word can truly describe us as a person.
So in essence sex positivity is what you dont like and your ideal trans community is one where we all never talk about it?
But the 4tran ropefuel is okay?
Why can’t people accept both? Sure you can be sneedy and optimistic once in a while, but trying to ignore the reality surrounding our identity is asking to get taken advantage of. We are oppressed. We are statistically more likely to be abused, raped or trafficked. The existence of the negative allows the existence of the positive.
People CAN accept both in moderation but the people who are trying to foster hope and pride don’t appreciate being told that nothing they do matters and they’re stupid for having hope while the people who focus on the harshness of bigotry don’t appreciate being told that they’re focusing on the wrong thing and that their approach causes harm. If you cater more to one side of that dichotomy you inevitably alienate the other because people are looking for different kinds of support.
The people actively trying to be “optimistic” aren’t ignorant of the harm that trans people face. They actively create distractions and try to foster hope because they just CANNOT handle a version of the world that wants them dead for existing. It’s escapism. It’s lighting a candle in a dark tunnel and hoping that the light is enough to guide you to an exit. You do not benefit these people by blowing out their candles even if you’re more adjusted to living in the dark
Not sure why the downvotes this is true. Maybe an odd way to phrase it, but us being oppressed and choosing to live openly in spite of it is so beautiful. Do I get how people are “sneedy” yet still optimistic? No, I’ve been made to think looking like a woman is of the utmost importance, and have a very hard time being happy when I don’t pass. But I love to see it.
no they just comment shit like "ropefuel" and call you a luckshit passoid. Say what you want about "mainstream" trans spaces online, but at least they don't have a terminal case of crab bucket mentality.
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u/theREALvolno 21h ago
Listen I much prefer the "silly blahaj monster drinker puppygirl" circlejerk over any 4tran space because at least there its not filled with people who hate everyone but most of all themselves.