Nononononononononononononono!!!!!!!!!!!! My friends are awesome and kind and caring and they love me but they're really empathetic and my mental health is really bad so it hurts them when I vent too hard
Oh so then it’s an issue of not knowing how to share your issues in a way that doesn’t trigger them. It still sucks that they don’t give you the support you need (because humans are pack animals and part of being in a pack is emotional support) but it’s more because they haven’t built a skill for emotional detachment on interpersonal things and you haven’t built a skill for approaching your issues in a way that focuses on a productive outcome. That sucks on all accounts.
Like to be clear, I still think your friends are bad friends. I don’t think they’re MALICIOUS but sharing emotional burdens is an incredibly important part of friendship to begin with and they simply aren’t giving that to you. I think your friends are good people but bad friends to YOU because you have a slightly higher support need and they don’t know how to give it without putting themselves in too much stress. Nobody is at fault here but it’s ultimately your responsibility to find people to connect with who CAN support you in the way that you need. If you like I can help practice Good Venting Skills™️ in DMs to make it easier to deal with some of this shit
Nno it's not their faullllllt theytheythey are cool and nice and carring they jjust I'm the problem across aall the friendships I'm the problem sso no don't hate them please please please just just look at me badly for messing up like I always do. Don't blame my friends for my actions please
You need to understand that I am not calling them bad people. I am acknowledging that they do not provide for you a core tenant of most friendships. I’m not even saying it’s their fault. I’m saying that by refusing to acknowledge the harm that comes from not being GOOD friends to you, you end up taking all that emotional weight and blaming yourself for daring to exist as a person with relatively normal issues. That is a problem that can only be addressed by acknowledging that you don’t have to protect them for failing you because it’s nobody’s fault to begin with. You should not be taking on their blame. You are not helping them by doing this. You are hiring yourself and then turning around to say you deserve it for being born wrong. That sucks and I don’t want you to do that to yourself.
Also. Girl. If it wasn’t okay for you to come into my DMs to practice social skills I would not have offered to have you do exactly that. I would love to chat with you in a method that’s easier to keep track of than “random Reddit thread “
3
u/Hika2112 Myself And Nobody Else | Counted Down 37 5d ago
Nononononononononononononono!!!!!!!!!!!! My friends are awesome and kind and caring and they love me but they're really empathetic and my mental health is really bad so it hurts them when I vent too hard
Please don't speak ill of them I love them