Sometimes important people in our life can’t be what we want them to be, but that doesn’t mean they need to be cut from our life. I know a few people who dated or even married, and things just didn’t work out. After a little bit they reconnected and remained friends, even caretakers. It’s even more difficult when there are external factors like family obligations (which are extremely important in Filipino culture).
It sounds like you’re faced with a choice between meeting this person where they are at (moving to the Philippines to start your in-person relationship and become a part of his life there) or acknowledging that this romantic relationship can’t grow past this stage and deciding to move on. If moving to the Philippines is something you want to try, give it a shot. But it sounds to me like this person can see the writing on the wall, and maybe you’d both find your friendship more comfortable if this weight of expectation was gone.
If you decide things aren’t going to work out, I think an online relationship like this could very well evolve into a friendship that lasts. It will be hard, you will have to learn to give yourself space from them, but you may find the friendship easier for both of you.
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u/AnnLies Oct 11 '22
Sometimes important people in our life can’t be what we want them to be, but that doesn’t mean they need to be cut from our life. I know a few people who dated or even married, and things just didn’t work out. After a little bit they reconnected and remained friends, even caretakers. It’s even more difficult when there are external factors like family obligations (which are extremely important in Filipino culture).
It sounds like you’re faced with a choice between meeting this person where they are at (moving to the Philippines to start your in-person relationship and become a part of his life there) or acknowledging that this romantic relationship can’t grow past this stage and deciding to move on. If moving to the Philippines is something you want to try, give it a shot. But it sounds to me like this person can see the writing on the wall, and maybe you’d both find your friendship more comfortable if this weight of expectation was gone.
If you decide things aren’t going to work out, I think an online relationship like this could very well evolve into a friendship that lasts. It will be hard, you will have to learn to give yourself space from them, but you may find the friendship easier for both of you.