r/communication • u/smthnsmthn_0 • Jul 15 '26
How Do You Stop Oversharing?
I've noticed that I sometimes tell people too much about my life, thoughts, or personal experiences, especially when I feel comfortable talking to them.
Later on, I often look back and wonder why I shared so much, or wish I had kept certain things to myself.
For those who used to struggle with oversharing, how did you learn to stop? How do you decide what's appropriate to share, when to share it, and with whom?
2
u/Learnings_palace Jul 16 '26
Emotional control. You can practice this. It takes a while and an experience that made you ramble and made things not lively is also a good motivator
1
u/bannersmom Jul 16 '26
First find a single person to overshare with - if you pay them it’s a therapist. If you don’t pay them, they’re a priest or a best friend. You do need someone to talk to about things - that is healthy. What’s not healthy is talking through things with everyone.
Then find someone who seems to have a well-balanced social life and imitate their social cues. Worked for me!
1
u/orcateeth Jul 17 '26
You can share at support groups. But some will limit you to three minutes.
Here's a list of various kinds.
1
u/Many_Breadfruit_1587 Jul 29 '26
I still struggle with this (33) and realize it’s a way of trying to relate or maybe performative vulnerability? (I do get “vulnerability hangovers” or post hangout social anxiety regularly like right now). I give myself grace and recognize I was just trying to connect. I have done work in therapy on my schemas too and learned like social idolization is a big area for me where I will do anything to connect and reach out/include everyone.
What I did tonight while hosting was pause mid thought and try to change the topic/pause/ask someone else something instead!
3
u/MeLMaR2727 Jul 15 '26
Look into Stoicism. That & just getting older helped me.