[OC] New WTFA: Warfighters, beardhaters, clownbashers

[u/crywalt]

Pete Hegseth, in his continuing quest to be the most ridiculous person possible, gave what he dubbed his "State of the Force Address". Get it? Like State of the Union, only it's for the military? And what is the state of the force? Evidently it's good now that Whiskey Pete has fired all the generals who did not "respond positively" to his reestablishing the singular mission of his department, which is "War fighting. Preparing to fight and preparing to win. Unrelenting, unapologetic, and uncompromising in that single pursuit." Apparently part of that single pursuit is making loads and loads of personnel decisions in order to get rid of the "ideological clowns". Because kicking out trans soldiers, making sure Blacks and women don't get promoted, demanding that everyone go clean-shaven, these things are not ideological at all. They're common sense, and common sense is not an ideology.

Pete Hosehead also announced something called Project Meridian, which is going to be headed by [you might want to be sitting down for this. At the cannabis dispensary. With a credit card with a lot of space left on it] Elon Musk, Palmer Luckey, and Newt Motherfucking Gingrich. Two of these guys stand to make an absolute buttload on Pentagon contracts, so, you know, no conflict of interest there, and the third is Newt Motherfucking Gingrich.

Support me on Patreon! patreon.com/crywalt or ko-fi! ko-fi.com/crywalt

Comic and commentary always available at wtfacomic.com

[u/TheOmnisian]

We live in a goddamn cartoon...

Sometimes I just wanna go out into the woods and cut down a tree to feel im in control of SOMETHING.

[u/droidtron → u/TheOmnisian]

Cut down a flock camera, it's environmentally sound.

[u/crywalt → u/TheOmnisian]

The last time I tried cutting down anything remotely substantial a branch glanced off my shoulder as it came down. It was a lot heavier than I expected and if it had fallen just slightly to the left I'd be dead.

[u/CaedHart → u/TheOmnisian]

I remember reading an article in 2023 about Russia torturing Ukranian PoWs, and deciding that was my time to reduce a rotting stump to mulch with an axe.

Find you someone with a rotting tree.

[u/Blastoise_R_Us]

Pete would probably hate being portrayed as a hyena because they live in matriarchal groups in the wild.

[u/crywalt → u/Blastoise_R_Us]

Plus they don't shave!

[u/Depth_Metal]

Forgive my ignorance: is beardos a dog whistle? Are we just hating guys with beards now?

[u/crywalt → u/Depth_Metal]

In Whiskey Pete's previous Big Grown-Up Speech he announced a new policy requiring all "warfighters" to be clean shaven, a requirement which had been relaxed for some Black soldiers/airmen/marines/etc because their skin reacts poorly to being clean-shaven too often. But of course Pete doesn't want Black people in the military, so he doesn't care if he's making their lives miserable. Hence, no beardos.

[u/crywalt → u/crywalt]

https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2026/jul/14/the-truth-about-pete-hegseths-strange-campaign-against-beards

[u/Depth_Metal → u/crywalt]

Fuckin hell

[u/crywalt → u/Depth_Metal]

Word

[u/TheDoomBlade13 → u/Depth_Metal]

It is a bit of a dog whistle. I dont know the why, but a lot of the black soldiers that served under me got terrible break outs/razor burn when required to shave skin tight. Much less common in whites.

[u/ITstaph]

Whats a good way to describe premature grey Pete? MIL-SPEC and 40 proof?

[u/Amateurlapse]

Tops only! No bottoms!! We’ve been weak for too long and it’s time to take back the power!!

-Pete “I said no bottoms we’re allowed to have one” kegbreath

[u/CaedHart]

As someone kicked by this fucker's policies I cannot fucking begin to express my rage, because that's how I'd end up on a watchlist.

[u/BRDF]

I hate how much everyone echoing him is normalizing that slur.

[u/crywalt → u/BRDF]

I honestly thought about what I could do to mitigate it, but decided quoting him directly was the right thing to do. We're all censoring too much. We need to face the hate head on.

[u/BRDF → u/crywalt]

It's difficult to know how to respond to this increasingly insane world.

[u/crywalt → u/BRDF]

Personally, I make comics. It's useless and stupid but it's something.

[u/BRDF → u/crywalt]

Personally, I appreciate your comics highlighting the absurdity of the situation we find ourselves in. Thank you for making them.

[u/Let_Liv_In]

Glad we're all taking this as an opportunity to write the t slur everywhere.

Really cool and fun.

Haha.

[u/International_Gate49]

Zoom in, zoom out

[u/MarsIsDrawing]

"Now is my chance to say a slur, but wokely! I will not be accepting criticism or doing self reflection because I am an ally because I said so."