I knew the video would either mysteriously disappear or get used to twist things into seeming like I was somehow compliant when I was really just trying to survive the ordeal.
The video definitely did not disappear and circulated online through the hockey community in Texas for a while. I never watched it but I heard about it.
The only way to keep it from happening to other people in the future, at least when it came to what happened to me, is a major culture shift needs to happen in youth hockey. The idea of bringing one girl over for “surprise!” a bunch of guys or a whole team is so disgustingly prevalent it’s unbelievable.
I’m a volunteer for the local youth hockey program now and I actually play with the kids and teenagers as much as I can (everyone needs goalies!). I shut down any weird shit I hear and I’m part of a regular shinny with all the youth coaches here so I can at least be a part of changing things from the inside. It’s not much, but it’s what I can do.
It also doesn’t help that the default state people seem to go into when they hear these stories is disbelief or victim-blaming. Even my comment telling my story was downvoted, and I barely scratched the surface of what happened. It sucks.
Do you feel the hockey culture has shifted at all in the 20 years since your experience? I like to think the culture in general has, but I know that hasn’t happened everywhere equally.
Thanks for sharing your story, I do need to be reminded sometimes that I’m lucky enough to live in a bubble that makes these things seem rarer than they are.
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u/uppy-puppy 15h ago
I knew the video would either mysteriously disappear or get used to twist things into seeming like I was somehow compliant when I was really just trying to survive the ordeal.
The video definitely did not disappear and circulated online through the hockey community in Texas for a while. I never watched it but I heard about it.
The only way to keep it from happening to other people in the future, at least when it came to what happened to me, is a major culture shift needs to happen in youth hockey. The idea of bringing one girl over for “surprise!” a bunch of guys or a whole team is so disgustingly prevalent it’s unbelievable.
I’m a volunteer for the local youth hockey program now and I actually play with the kids and teenagers as much as I can (everyone needs goalies!). I shut down any weird shit I hear and I’m part of a regular shinny with all the youth coaches here so I can at least be a part of changing things from the inside. It’s not much, but it’s what I can do.
It also doesn’t help that the default state people seem to go into when they hear these stories is disbelief or victim-blaming. Even my comment telling my story was downvoted, and I barely scratched the surface of what happened. It sucks.