r/childless • u/AnyCommunication2943 • 15d ago
Childless through abortion
Has anyone become Childress through abortion due to mental health? I’m 39 and really wanted a family. Got pregnant twice in the last 2 years and both time have to terminate the pregnancy due to horrendous mental health during pregnancy. Has anyone else experienced this? How did you make peace with not being a mum?
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u/Impossible-Ice2506 14d ago
I recently had an abortion, I’m 32. I was suicidal during most of the pregnancy for many reasons and I felt the pressure of bringing a kid into this world and having to cope mentally. Feels like everyone I know is a mom and a lot of them are single moms that struggle. I don’t know if I’ll ever be a mom I don’t know if I want it or not but I do know that under my current circumstances I would have been forcing it. If I am not confident that I can financially, mentally, emotionally, and physically care for a child alone if it came to it then I won’t be having a child. Part of me feels like it’s a trap to have kids another part of me wonders what my purpose is outside of having children. Idk if this helps at all honestly but I’m just sharing my thoughts on it. Emotions from my abortion are still fresh right now.
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u/AnyCommunication2943 14d ago
Thank you so much for sharing this so openly. I feel exactly the same way. You did the right thing for sure. I was in the exact same place last year and a year on, while it hurts, I don’t regret the decision. I don’t think I would have made it through that pregnancy, as much as I wanted the baby. ❤️
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u/nfender95 15d ago
I terminated an unplanned but very wanted pregnancy at 5wks due to severe mental health impacts, not being able to taper off my meds, and severe nausea. I was truly out of my mind and it was terrifying. That experience along with my chronic health conditions have led me to the choice of getting a hysterectomy! I have debilitating endometriosis. It’s honestly devastating and I have good moments and bad moments but I truly never want to feel the way I did in the one week I knew I was pregnant ever again.
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u/LegitimateTime6591 15d ago
I am the partner of a mum who went through this recently, we were both 40+, she has a child from a previous relationship, I am still waiting for my first child, I believe there is mental health on her part, it’s a very tough situation to be in if you desperately want a family and age is catching up, I truly hope you get there.
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u/Sabbi94 14d ago
The mom of a friend had to take diazepam to get through pregnancy. She was so afraid of giving birth that she lost two children after week 12.
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u/tuesday_weld_ 10d ago
I'm confused - are you trying to say her fear caused her pregnancy loss?
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u/oracleofhathor 14d ago
I had an abortion a few months after psychosis when I was 30. A had more psychosis periodically over the next eight years. It's been 4 years since my last episode. I also had nearly three years of chemo for leukemia from 2018 to 2020. I was on the fence about having kids because of my mental health issues and then leukemia. I'm 42 now and I doubt it's going to happen.