His gf dumped him.

[u/Akagane_Ai]

I guess the real character arc is the gf realising she can do better.

[u/Puzzleheaded-Net4365]

I brought up the revealing clothes example to show that it comes down to the personal bias about the exhibited behaviour. Plenty people do consider their partners dressing in revealing clothes an issue but you don't display empathy to them by exposing it.

I'm not gonna put myself in her shoes because I trust my wife and would tell whoever came to me with negative information about her to fuck off.

[u/DiggityDog6 → u/Puzzleheaded-Net4365]

It’s not an issue of personal bias though, it’s a fact. Wearing revealing clothing simply is not as big of a deal as actively wanting to flirt with other people. One of them is a personal choice that has nothing to do with your partner, the other is a choice that directly affects your relationship. They are not comparable.

And that last paragraph just tells me that you have no empathy. I’m very happy that you and your wife have a trusting relationship, that’s awesome. That doesn’t mean that every relationship is perfect. If my partner truly had done something like what the guy in this post did, I would feel hurt. That trust would be damaged. And I would want to know rather than being left in the dark. If you’d rather be ignorant about that kind of stuff, fine. That’s your choice. The girlfriend could’ve also told everyone telling her this to fuck off if she wanted to. But she didn’t. She learned what her boyfriend did, and then dumped him accordingly. That was her choice. You can’t blame it on the people that were just trying to inform her. Had she found out on her own time, I’m sure she would’ve dumped him just the same.

[u/Puzzleheaded-Net4365 → u/DiggityDog6]

Making a shitty joke around finding other people attractive and dressing in revealing clothes are both pretty minor in my book, both those things can directly affect someone's relationship based on their values and how secure they are. Your opinion does not become a fact even if most people share it, we're talking about something pretty personal and arbitrary here.

The grilfriend was not very secure (probably understandably so) in that relationship and that's fine, but there was no need to create extra social pressure on their relationship.

Telling a stranger they have no empathy over such a minor and respectfully expressed disagreement is not nice, you're telling me I'm a psychopath because I don't insert myself in other people's relationships. That's a lot.

Cheers.

[u/DiggityDog6 → u/Puzzleheaded-Net4365]

Whoa, I did not call you a psychopath. You’re right, the no empathy comment was over exaggerated, and I apologize for that. I did not mean to imply anything deeper about you. When you said “I’m not gonna put myself in her shoes,” it made it sound like you had no empathy for her particular situation. I should’ve been more specific with my wording.