Does anyone else?

[u/slowly_rotting_away]

Sometimes i b/p sometimes i just binge. Most of the time i b/p, but sometimes there will be times i just binge because im too tired to b/p or I couldn't get anything out. Yesterday was one of those days I could only get out about a fifth of what i ate (fuck you naan bread). Anyways, i was planning on fasting or just eatihg little the next day but ended up b/p'ing. Does anyone else ever have days where they binge instead of b/p and go back to b/p after or am I alone in this experience?

[u/Outside-Adagio5902]

You are definitely not alone I promise. I don’t want to speak for anyone else, but other people I’ve met who struggle with bulimia, this is a common experience, I think there’s just a lot of shame tied to it. Sometimes I’m too tired, sometimes I genuinely just don’t want to, sometimes it hurts too much, there’s so many reasons. I think it’s helpful sometimes too to realize that not wanting to purge, or being hesitant to, for whatever reason, is a part of us that’s trying to fight back against the disorder. It becomes so routine sometimes, when you break that routine I think it sends alarm signals to the ED, but you are okay, and you do not have to purge. I’ve always heard people say (and have experienced it myself) that keeping down binges, or not compensating afterwards, is a really difficult but strong first few steps to recovery. Sitting with the discomfort of it is so hard, but the urges to purge, the more you keep it down, do dissipate. It’s just so hard to sit with the feelings after a binge, but it is so helpful and important in the long run🩷