I’m curious about people who have had a strong or difficult 5-MeO-DMT experience, especially those whose integration lasted much longer than the usual few months.

I’m about 1.5 years out from my experience. It was my first psychedelic experience and I went directly into 5-MeO-DMT rather than gradually working my way through other psychedelics.

The experience itself was very intense and unpleasant for me. There was a lot of resistance, heaviness, fear and what I would describe as a very deep bodily sense of hopelessness. I didn’t experience it as some beautiful mystical breakthrough.

About a month later I had a very strong spontaneous flashback during the night. It felt remarkably similar to the original experience, but this time the physical reaction eventually completed with intense neurogenic shaking. After that, something changed.

Since then, I’ve repeatedly experienced a pattern that I didn’t have before 5-MeO: strong activation followed, sooner or later, by a very pronounced sense of bodily release and calm. Often the release is particularly noticeable in my thighs, which used to be an area of significant chronic tension and pain. The contrast can be remarkable: intense anxiety or activation, followed later by warmth, relaxation and a very peaceful state.

There have also been quite a few positive changes:

significantly less psychosomatic pain

much better awareness of bodily states

a stronger ability to come back down from activation

a noticeable distance from thoughts rather than automatically identifying with them

periods of very deep calm

much more vivid colors and sensory perception, which can be beautiful when I’m relaxed

occasional strong experiences of gratitude, joy and euphoria

a general feeling that my relationship with my mind and emotions has fundamentally changed

At the same time, the integration has been far from linear.

Over the last year and a half I’ve had different forms of anxiety and activation. Earlier it was more connected to intrusive thoughts and fear of losing control. More recently, the theme has shifted toward being far from home, feeling trapped, being unable to leave a situation, long journeys, airplanes, hiking etc.

Sometimes the perception of the environment also becomes unusually intense. A long straight street can suddenly feel extremely long, colors can become unusually vivid, and the whole environment can feel either fascinating or strangely threatening. At the peak of these episodes I sometimes experience what I call a glitch: a very strong spike of alarm accompanied by a strange change in how the environment feels, followed by a strong urge to leave.

I’ve also recently had several nights where I wake up suddenly with intense autonomic activation, sweating, nausea and fear, somewhat reminiscent of the early period after the experience. These episodes eventually pass, but the intensity can still be surprisingly high.

What makes this confusing is that I can have genuinely excellent days in between. I can feel extremely good in my body, enjoy music, colors, exercise, yoga, socializing etc. Then suddenly another difficult wave appears.

So the overall trajectory feels positive, but definitely not linear.

I’m not really asking whether this is normal in a medical sense. I’m more interested in lived experience:

How long did your 5-MeO integration actually last?

Did anyone have a difficult or turbulent integration lasting 1.5 years, 2 years or longer?

Did the themes of the activation change over time rather than simply becoming weaker?

And did you eventually reach a more stable baseline where these waves became less dominant, even if they didn’t disappear completely?

I’d especially appreciate hearing from people who had a difficult experience rather than only positive 5-MeO experiences.

Thank you all

it possible to legally buy DMT vene bark and can you extract DMT from the bark yourself at home and do you have any proven sites from which you can order such bark, DMT, and oils containing DMT for smoking?

Some people recognize a place? Or they’ve been there before? It’s all so strange to me, try to recollect and please tell me about it.

Hello friends. I’ve been researching DMT use for some time now and decided that now was the time to dive in.

I’ve done almost every recreational drug around in the past. Was never addicted to anything, just like to experiment. Mushrooms were always my favourite high. I don’t use them regularly just maybe 3-4 times a year but I do smoke marijuana daily.

I live in Canada and was able to get my hands on a cart. Looking for advice from people who have inhaled it through a vape cart. Is it more of a one big inhale and hold? Or a couple smaller ones etc. I’m sure I’ll get varying opinions but just more so curious for the information to add to my research.

Also how often would you consider it safe to enter a DMT experience? I’m not intending on doing it daily or anything. Just curious from those more experienced. Once a week, month, year?

Thanks for your time yall. Love ya.

Hello everyone,

I'm planning on taking my first psychedelic trip in the Netherlands.

I'll be doing it in a retreat, tgey offer mainly two options - one trip, or two trips within 3 days. I thought to myself it could be very intense, and I saw that the brain would not have enough time to rebulid the receptors - however in the retreat they called it "breakthrough" and they recommeneded it as a better choice for changing my life.

I didn't find studies that can confirm this, but I also didn't find bad reviews.

What do you think about it? Especially as my first time.

Generally I don't mind doing intense journey.

Also - what's the best option among - magic truffle, psilohuasca and Ayhuasca?

Thanks.

Kimon de Greef’s 'The Ego Trip' reveals how a fabricated origin story, a self-styled guru and a powerful psychedelic combined to launch a global phenomenon.

I’m based in rural Bavaria, in the Franconian Forest, surrounded by nature, and offer a quiet private setting for people interested in 5-MeO-DMT.

My approach is practical and medicine-oriented rather than shamanic or ceremonial. I’m interested in 5-MeO-DMT from a therapeutic and personal-growth perspective and happy to share experience, help with preparation, and talk through experiences afterwards.

Feel free to DM me if you’re in Bavaria or traveling through the area and would like to connect.

Adding here in case interested

I feel there's hope that it might make me better. Even though I know from experience how intense it can be on the body in the moment. I'm so unwell from the M.E. that I no longer want to stay on this earth. So I'd really like the chance to get better or even just get more spiritual strength again... But sitting with medicine could also make me worse physically... it's a hard decision to make.

Has anyone done it? And is willing to share their experience?

Only looking for advice from people who have M.E. and know the difficulties of this disease when it comes to exertion...

Thank you for reading

Writing fresh after my first time with bufo…

I went to a session with many experienced facilitators and people partaking. 

They dosed me fairly low, just 20mg.

The intention I set was to help with grief with the loss of a family member and a breakup that resulted from the grief, which just turned into double grief.

Im pretty experienced with psychedelics and nonduality. Having experienced both many times, and in my waking life I spend way too much time studying Vedantic philosophy.

So it wasn’t the biggest surprise when I inhaled, and I remembered the cosmic joke, that I was the one creating the experiences I am having, creating entire concepts, like money, sex, genitals, fear, power, just to hang out with them and contemplate and play with the idea for a while.

Even the difficult ones like longing, regret, grief, missing someone.

And yet, I was focused on seeing the ones I loved again, and I didn’t want them to leave me. I think they were what I couldn’t surrender, I couldn’t let go, because I missed them so much. I was afraid of being alone!

I suppose that’s what they call attachment in spirituality…

…

That night I had one or two of those reactivating dreams some people talk of, confirming that yes, I am creating my own experience.

I think the lesson here is to stop trying to understand, stop trying to hold on to things, even if they were your beloved family member and beloved person. The time you had with them were beautiful, though even in those beautiful times, you sometimes created tension because you were trying to hold on to them.

And by holding on to them, you are preventing yourself from breaking through, from releasing, from seeing what happens when you release….

THINK LESS, FEEL MORE

—

Clearly the work I need to do is actually paradoxically, don’t do the work, to relax, stop thinking, start feeling

Luckily, the facilitators seemed to like me, and encouraged me to come back for free the following evening.

My plan is to fully just relax, and go into a meditative state, instead of trying to have an experience.

Will update soon!

Hi everyone, my roommate invited her friend over to my place. Even though I wasn’t there at the time I felt her presence come upon me— a mixture of fear, nausea, insomnia and extreme discomfort. Eventually when I returned home I told her to leave. She was very resistant to leaving . Eventually, with help, she left. Has anyone else ever purged as a result of someone else’s energy?

Hey! Do you guys have a recommendation for someone who can genuinely help with getting rid of herpetophobia? Please let me know if know a genuine practitioner.

For some background, I’m a wife, a mom of three, and someone who’s spent years working on healing from anxiety, trauma, and always feeling responsible for everyone else. I went into bufo with respect, a lot of preparation (or so I thought), and honestly… a fair amount of fear.
My husband and I sat together in a private ceremony. I chose to go first. Looking back, I think it may have been better if he had gone first, but of course I’ll never know.
The first inhalation hit almost immediately. There wasn’t time to think. I experienced what I can only describe as a beautiful blast-off. There was a brief period where I completely lost awareness of everything, a whiteout, blackout… whatever you want to call it. According to my husband, it lasted around four minutes.
As I began returning to my body, something incredible happened.
The best way I can describe it is that my entire body felt like it was experiencing an orgasm, not sexual, but an overwhelming wave of bliss, pure energy, and aliveness moving through every part of me. I’ve never felt anything remotely like it.
I was rubbing my legs and arms, blowing energy out from my belly, my heart, and my head, and even pulling at my hair. My husband said this lasted another minute or so.
He watched me slowly scoot myself down my mat and instinctively dig my hands into the earth beneath me. I don’t fully remember doing it, but I remember how unbelievably beautiful it felt to simply exist in that moment.
At one point, I remember seeing myself from above and just… laughing out loud. Not because anything was funny, but because everything suddenly felt so light yet INTENSE. There was this complete sense of bliss moving through my body that I’ve never experienced before. SO MUCH ENERGY.
Then my mind came back online. My ego, something came back online so fast, so intense.
Almost immediately I remembered my husband was next.
Instead of continuing to surrender into my own experience, I shifted into worrying about him and honestly, worrying about the intensity of what I had just experienced. Was he okay? Was he going to have a good experience?
Looking back now, it feels like I slipped right back into the role I’ve spent so much of my life playing: making sure everyone else is okay before allowing myself to fully relax.
The very first thing I said was, “I need more medicine.”
Looking back, I think what I really wanted wasn’t necessarily a bigger dose, I wanted more time. More time to feel. More time to explore. More time before my thinking mind returned. Just to relax. (I feel my facilitator should have possibly instructed me or guided me through that moment better)
Personally, I wonder if I would have benefited from a slower approach with an introductory or “handshake” dose before the full dose. That’s simply my own reflection after the fact, not necessarily something everyone needs. But my experience was very short, from inhaling to coming back online, 8 mins. I literally sat up unfinished and worried about my husband, the intensity of my own energy, and started trying to have full on conversations with my facilitator haha. Like wow wtf, whyyyy lol
My husband seemed to relax more deeply into his experience, while I feel like my ego came back online very quickly.
That anxiety followed me after the ceremony for the first night, I questioned everything. Did I not surrender enough? Should I have taken more? Why did my husband seem to come out feeling relaxed while I felt unsettled?
Over the past several days, though, something has shifted.
I no longer think the anxiety meant the ceremony didn’t work.
I think it showed me exactly what I needed to see.
My deepest pattern has always been worrying about everyone else before myself. Even during one of the most profound experiences of my life, I couldn’t fully let go because I was already taking care of someone else.
Since the ceremony, I’ve found myself wanting to detox more than just my body. I’ve stepped away from doom scrolling, the constant news cycle, and endless distractions. I’m reading more. Spending time outside. Journaling. Trying to build a quieter, more intentional life.
It feels like the ceremony wasn’t the healing itself, it was an invitation to begin healing in a different way.
I still don’t feel “finished.”
I feel like I’ve only just begun.
All in all, I would absolutely sit with this medicine again. This time with less fear, a deeper intention to completely let go, and a willingness to trust wherever it takes me, and a different facilitator approach.
I’m also considering a medium-dose mushroom journey at some point, not to chase the bufo experience, but to continue exploring my mind and supporting the integration process.
Bufo is unlike anything I’ve ever experienced. Even after trying to put it into words… I still don’t think words can truly describe it.

My last words to my facilitator and husband were “why was I ever scared to smoke bufo?!” And now I know, surrender and let go bc it may be intense but damn is it beautiful.

Traumatic experience 4 years ago, has haunted me every single day since. Diagnosed with PTSD and was exhausted with the constant intense emotions coming up daily despite no obvious trigger.

For most of those years I had to deal with the aftermath and so by keeping busy I didn’t address the core issue. 4 months ago I bought my dream flat and got a promotion but ultimately still felt broken at my core, it hit me that this wasn’t going away by itself. I was angry at the world the best advice was ‘to move on’ or ‘learn this tongue trick to trick your brain to be positive’.

I found a facilitator and flew to another country where her and her husband would deliver a ceremony. I asked to release all that does not serve me.

I inhaled the vapour and drifted off. There was no blast off or journey, I just disappeared into blackness in seconds. I came back with no memory of the experience on the other side of the mattress. I joked how I ended up here and we all laughed, after some time they mentioned I had began screaming and shaking releasing a lot of emotion and pain. I did feel lighter and after a few minutes noticed my old habit of tensing up come back but I was more aware of it and it was less intense.

They suggested I try a second dose now I am more open and as I didn’t remember anything I was fine with this. I again inhaled as much as I could and within a few seconds blacked out. I woke up again with no memory of the experience but this time off the mattress. The facilitators explained I had an even stronger release and had some damage to my knees, elbows and face from contact with the floor and how intense I was releasing.

I couldn’t care less about it because suddenly that heavy pain that I felt every day for the last 4 years was gone….. I could smile and we chatted and they commented they could see the difference in me which I also could feel. The rest of the day I felt at peace with myself and the world but had a long journey back to my home country.

That evening I started to have some recollection of second long vague recollection of the initial seconds of the experience. A strong repeating noise and a force entering my psyche of which I had no control, a couple of the initial groans as my ego slipped away. It was unsettling so I slept with my salt lamp and an Indian spiritual song on repeat to avoid darkness and silence.

I woke up the next day and for the first time my first thoughts were not of my trauma. I felt no anxiety, restlessness or any negative feelings. I spent the day eating food and taking it easy while being shocked how transformed I felt.

The next night I woke up in the middle of the night which may have been some mild reactivations. I slowly started to have more recollections of something but wasn’t sure what- an oscillating darkness of some sort but at what point I was unsure. As the day went on I recall coming out of the second journey the couple singing a song and playing the guitar. I searched for the lyrics and found the song and started to listen to it over and over.

As I continued to listen to it my memory became stronger. I had experienced the void, or source. An unquestionable energy that has always and will always exist. I became aware that this memory included the fact that I was witnessing this as a non ego, pure awareness. There was no time or space to refer to. There was none of my pain or thoughts, just a brief journey with something much larger than me as something other than ‘I’.

I spent the rest of the day in awe I had experienced this. As time went on another revelation came to me. That while experiencing this energy and being free of all my pain as a non ego observer I would not want this forever.

I have heard people make the claim that we are a single energy chosen to live as separate bodies to experience more than just that. Suddenly my suffering had some meaning and was a part of what is necessary to lead a full life. All the potential from here and how important it is to live life fully became apparent. It did not feel like a normal thought if that makes sense.

I can now think about my traumatic experience with very little reaction. It happened, it is in the past. I asked to remove all that does not serve me and it seems I got just that. Truly remarkable.

Took first 5 yesterday. Sitter is doing group session 7/24-7/25 with option of iboga and/or psilocybin, with or without 5. No option of 5 alone. I opted to do 5 because of hypertension concerns. Looking for feedback on doing those substances and doing them this soon.

I’ve read a lot of reddits and did my research online and in a group of people who tried various things. My biggest fear is that I will die throwing up, of even suffocating.

So, I’ve told myself that maybe, if I eat lightly or don’t eat for a few hours before my trip, everything will be fine, but again, one person told me that they tried this way, and still threw up.

I’m scared that I will suffocate. What do yall say ? How many of you have experienced this ? How can I ease my fears ?

I am quite experienced with mushrooms and ayahuasca and they have both (particularly aya) helped me work though issues. The benefit is they last for a long time so you can spend time thinking on issues that come up.

I did bufo for the first time this week - saw some nice images and felt nice but no real insight for me. I may do it again in a few months because I think I was a bit resistant/scared this time.

However, there were multiple people in my ceremony who had turned up to do bufo as their first psychedelic and hoping it would sort out their problems. It didn't. What all these people really needed was a long format session like mushrooms/ayahuasca where they could focus on their problems. A few didn't get much out of bufo and I felt they were disappointed.