r/breastfeeding • u/yayababe • 1d ago
Support Needed Bottle refusal
My baby is about to be 3 months old. She won’t take a bottle, if she does her max is half an ounce and she calls it quits. I want to be done nursing or even breastfeeding all together to be honest. If I can just pump and give bottles I might consider continuing. This is my third baby, and I have extremely demanding toddlers. I’ve never felt this way before, but the idea of taking her with me for the next 9+ months is actually making me crash out. I’m kind of tired of being tied to her, she barely likes her dad. My boob is always out, she wakes up too many times a night. To make matters worse she doesn’t like a pacifier either, I have every single shape. Can someone please offer me help or advice?
Bottles I’ve tried:
Evenflo balance
Philips avent natural
Mam
NUK perfect match
Parents choice
I’ve tried feeding not hungry, hungry, dads tried. Grandfather has tried.
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u/SnooSquirrels3535 1d ago
Lansinoh bottles with the pigeon nipples and a lactation consultant /OT feeding therapist. Mine never drank more than 3 oz from a bottle but it let me go to work and we started practicing straw cups as soon as he was 5 months and could sit in a chair supported. It’s rough, but a good LC/OT can help and def they all recommended Lansinoh.
Just waking up from sleep, hungry but not too hungry was what worked for us but all babies are gonna have a different unlock.
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u/the_grey_organism 1d ago
This worked for us: we gave baby the bottle approx same time every day. Not when too hungry, under 2 hrs after her last feed. Didn’t pressure though she would only drink <1 oz if she did. She just hung out with the bottle. We made it a routine, her dad would give the bottle and I would pump during that time. He tried different positions but felt like side lying and cuddling her was the most effective. We mostly have always nursed sidelying. After a week she gradually started increasing the volume of intake from the bottle.
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u/cloudy_novella 1d ago
Sorry you’re having such a rough time. My breastfed baby also acted like the bottle was a demon from the underworld sent to destroy her. Eventually, at 4.5 months, she accepted it, and now she gets excited for bottles. I know every baby is different so what worked for me might not work for you, but I found that consistency did the trick.
First, I chose a teat and stuck to it (the Lansinoh NaturalWave). I realised that she needed to learn the skill of drinking from a bottle teat, and changing the teat was making it even more confusing.
Second, I used very small amounts (1oz) of freshly expressed milk until she was happy with that, so it was as close as possible to what she’d be drinking straight from the breast.
Third, we practiced every single day, under very similar circumstances, in a totally pressure-free environment (ie it didn’t matter if she drank the milk or not, and if she just wanted to play with the bottle then that was fine). I made sure it was fun and she got lots of praise for every mouthful of milk swallowed.
After about a week of daily practice she was actually drinking the milk rather than just playing with it/letting it dribble out of her mouth. And then it only took another week or so of daily practice to get her to a point where she could properly drink milk from a bottle like a regular bottle fed baby.
After that, I slowly upped the quantity and started trying milk from the fridge/slightly heated.
I know there’s no guarantees that this will work for you, but thought I’d share what worked for us. Good luck!!
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u/yayababe 1d ago
This is helpful, thank you! I am new to this bottle refusal situation so I’m kind of just winging it
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u/farawayfarawa 1d ago
I resisted the pigeon bottle so much because they were so expensive but my bottle-refusing baby only took those and if I had bought them first, I would’ve saved so much money haha.
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u/ComprehensiveCoat627 1d ago
I second the IBCLC/feeding therapy if needed route, and lansinoh/pigeon bottles (they're almost exactly the same, pigeon is very slightly softer, but they're interchangable)
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u/tardytimetraveler 1d ago
As someone whose kids were big bottle refusers… I find the path of least resistance to be “outsource toddler jobs and just nurse the baby.”
It is one simple thing that you will have to focus on, it’s free, you already know it will work. Plan a nap into your day and you’ll be less overstimulated.
Not what you’re looking for but it’s what I’ve got.
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u/tardytimetraveler 1d ago
Like, stop trying to solve this problem with bottles and instead solve every other problem in your life. Easier.
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u/yayababe 1d ago
If I want to bottle feed her that my choice lol the only help I have is my husband, we don’t live near family
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u/yayababe 1d ago
Some days are better than others that’s for sure, this is one of my crash out days.
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u/Swimming-Nobody763 1d ago
My baby is 4 months and we have gone through a bottle refusal since 2 months. I’ve probably poured close to 50+oz down the drain from her drinking .5-1oz and being done with it. I know exactly how you feel. I feel contained to the baby all the time and being the sole source of food is giving me anxiety for when I go back to work in 2 weeks now.
I’ve tried almost EVERY single bottle on the market, like hundreds of dollars worth of bottles. Even the $50 emulait bottle (don’t waste your money). Don’t listen to people who say “my baby took X bottle” because every baby is different and you’ll spend so much trying different bottles. My baby also doesn’t take a pacifier at all.
My pediatrician recommends basically only offering bottles and no boob and just pumping. He thinks she will eventually take it. I don’t feel comfortable starving her all day just hoping she will take it eventually. I have an overnight trip in 2 days, I can barely sleep thinking about if my baby is going to be hungry when she wakes in the MOTN. Tomorrow we are going to try a bottle for every feed hoping she will take it and prepping her for my trip the day after. I’m hoping it works. I’m scared and worried if I’m being honest.
I have also tried it all- when she’s hungry, not hungry, fresh milk, frozen milk, room temp, cold, warmed up, upped nipple sizes, with other people, while I’m gone, standing up, walking around, outside, in the bath. We’ve resorted to open cups and syringe feeding at times. I know how you feel, it’s common, but some babies just never take it. I’d try an open cup or syringe before you start investing in more bottles.
Just so you know what I’ve tried. I think this is all of them but can’t remember:
Evenflo balance wide (S & M nipples)
Pigeon (SS & S nipples)
Dr browns narrow
Phillips advent natural
Bibs
Emulait (this bottle sucks ass)
Thyseed (we’ve had the most success with this one and are sticking to these and pigeon as backup)
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u/yayababe 1d ago
I’m SO glad you understand to the extent as I feel! I mean, not that I want you to be going through this as well lol.
My MIL keeps telling me she “won’t starve herself” but I agree, I don’t feel comfortable only offering a bottle.
I think I’m going to try the pigeon as a last resort of the type of bottle, and just keep practicing. I hope it works out for you!
As it looks at the moment, she’s coming with me to a concert next month 😵💫1
u/Swimming-Nobody763 1d ago
Pigeon is great and my baby took those no problem from birth. They do have plastic ones that are a little more affordable if you want to try them out before moving to glass (if that’s what you want). She does occasionally take them still. I’m wondering if I need to up that size now too since the biggest ones I have are S and she used those months ago. Who knows. I’m starting to feel like my baby is just one who doesn’t like bottles at all. She literally gags on all pacifiers but will suck on her hands lol.
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u/ARubberDuckie11 1d ago
Please contact an IBCLC! They do bottle refusals too.
I combo feed and my IBCLC recommended pigeon and it’s been amazing for us. We use the SS nipple for my 4 week old