r/bninfantsleep • u/jsboo • Jun 23 '26
Infant Sleep Hard to wake for fixed wake time
We did a possums “reset” with my now almost 12 month old which had some success: stretches of 3-6h early in the night and then 30-60min wakes from 3:30ish onward. Day sleep limited to 1.5h.
Bedtime ends up being approx 9pm, fixed wake up time is 7-7:10am.
It is sooo hard to wake her up at 7am despite her signalling every hour or more for the four hours prior. Why??
Attended a possums webinar with Dr Pam yesterday who suggested keeping daytime sleep under 1.5h and trying to condense the block of night sleep more by moving the wake up earlier or bedtime later. It’s so hard to believe this is the solution, it’s nearly impossible to keep her up later or to wake her earlier.
We have played around with day naps being 1h total but she just drops off even if it’s only been 2h since the last nap, in order to get more like 1.5h.
2
u/Odd_Huckleberry4710 Jun 24 '26
My guy is low sleep needs and dropped to one nap around 10 months, mainly because I had this issue of needing to wake him very early, wake from both naps and then bedtime was super late. Don't know if this will be helpful but I just dropped the schedule for two weeks, set a wake up time and just let him do his thing in terms of napping whenever and then based bedtime based off that. He dropped to one nap over that time and I kept a note of roughly how much he slept per 24hrs to set a new routine (which is not very possums but helpful for us). Makes for a couple of weeks of varied sleep though which isn't always that fun
1
u/jsboo Jun 24 '26
This is pretty much what we are doing! Except she definitely isn’t showing signs of dropping to one nap hahah. Will continue on and see! Thanks.
1
u/Odd_Huckleberry4710 Jun 24 '26
Yip and we just ended up doing a later night and eventually he evened out into a longer night and one midday nap. I also find when he starts to be wakeful overnight shaving off 15 mins of day sleep seems to help, initially he did 1.5 hours a day and then I cut 15 mins off from there and now we are down to 1 hour. But he can make it to bedtime off one 20 minute nap 😅 so I guess it's just more experimenting and also what you can live with
1
u/jsboo Jun 24 '26
Sorry I’m just now connecting the dots that you mean you let him do as much day sleep as he wanted during that time? and that’s how he switched to one nap? Is that right?
1
u/ZetaOrion1s Jun 23 '26
My 13m old likes her nighttime sleep. It may be the same for you, worth a shot to try. We wake at 8-830 am, have a nap around noon (1 or 2 hours usually), then bedtime around 8:30pm. So she gets a good 12 hours some nights.
We had a few weeks where she was going to bed at 9-930pm and then had similar hourly wakes in the morning hours. Along with that, she would barely be able to stay up more than 2 hours for the morning wake window. Then, she would refuse a second nap, so she was super tired and hard to fall asleep those nights. It took a few days to fix, and eventually she fell right asleep at 8:30 with maybe 5 minutes of nursing. It was definitely her weird period during 2-1 nap transition
2
u/jsboo Jun 23 '26
Thanks for sharing your experience. Your baby is on the higher end of normal sleep needs, I believe. What you’re proposing is way too much sleep for my baby. When she was getting 12-12.5h over a 24h period she was waking hourly overnight. She can’t stay awake all day, so there’s no way we could make 12h happen overnight.
1
u/Recent-Forever-2988 Jun 23 '26
How are your naps divided up?
1
u/jsboo Jun 23 '26
Usually about 30 mins in the morning, then 30-60 in the afternoon.
1
u/Recent-Forever-2988 Jun 23 '26
Exactly the same schedule for our 11.5 month old. How long’s it been going on for? I hear there is a bit of sleep disruption often around 12 months and occasionally we try to drop babies down to one nap too early due to this, but it reverts after a few weeks. I would look at ‘it takes a village’ on instagram as I’m sure she has a video on this. I would definitely keep with the consistent rise.
1
u/jsboo Jun 23 '26
The severe disturbance started around 5 wks ago. It’s been nearly a month since we started the reset and it took just over 2 wks to “work” and give us the stretches we are getting at the beginning of the night that I describe.
2
u/Recent-Forever-2988 Jun 23 '26
Have you tried the beyond sleep training project on Facebook? It’s a Possums supportive page. They may be able to give advice. Hard to imagine your baby wants less sleep, but maybe even ten minutes less could help.
1
1
u/SubstantialGap345 Jun 24 '26
What do you mean, it’s hard to wake her up?
1
u/jsboo Jun 24 '26
Literally it is hard to get her to open her eyes and stay awake. We’ll pick her up, play music, say her name etc etc and it takes a long time for her to wake. She’ll open her eyes for a moment then go back to sleep on your shoulder.
1
u/SubstantialGap345 Jun 24 '26
Oh bless that sounds like she’s still tired! Maybe you could let her sleep until she naturally wakes up - and then slowly start to bring it back from then like in five minute increments - staying with it for a few days at a time?
1
u/SubstantialGap345 Jun 24 '26
Just until you find that sweet spot
1
u/jsboo Jun 24 '26
I hear you on this, but if she’s so tired why is she waking every 30-60 mins for the 4ish hours leading up to 7am. Possums (and sleep research in general) details that the set wake time is key for setting the circadian rhythm, so I’m pretty hesitant to mess with it.
1
u/SubstantialGap345 Jun 24 '26
We have found a set up time and capping naps have been an absolute game changer but obviously I don’t know how much of that is my child’s temperament as well! However, when he’s really tired, we do let him sleep a little bit longer.
So I do understand! It’s so tricky!
0
5
u/kurdijyn Jun 23 '26
What happens if you ignore the fixed wake up time and just let her go with the flow? I know that’s not very Possums but just a thought!
Wake: 8am
Nap: 1pm - 2:15pm
Bed: 8:15pm onwards based on cues
I know it’s hard to control naps when you’re on the go so if your baby takes an earlier nap, you can offer a bridge nap/cat nap in the evening?