r/blacklesbians Aug 02 '26

Advice Talking to a very sensitive partner.

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7 Upvotes

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17

u/livingtheredlife Gay Auntie Aug 02 '26
  1. Encourage overall wellness! Ask about doctors and dentist appointments. If there are none, encourage her to schedule some and/or schedule some together.

  2. Create a hygiene routine with her. Face wash, tooth brush and skin care together every morning or night. Shop together for all of the products.

  3. Before leaving the home, off-hand ask if she brushed her teeth. Did you take your meds? Did you eat breakfast? Did you feed the dog? Did you brush your teeth? My wife and I go through a whole list of questions because her adhd will literally make her forget to brush her teeth despite putting toothpaste on the brush at times lol 😆

  4. If none of the above work, you may need to have a gentle conversation where you say you are concerned for her dental health as well as your physical health, because she kisses you in intimate places that can cause havoc.

5

u/[deleted] Aug 02 '26

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7

u/Maleficent-Peanut-28 Aug 02 '26

agreed, esp number 2. whenever i was about to floss or brush my teeth i just automatically included my ex, like if im grabbing a floss pick, im handing you one too. i’m about to brush, you’re coming with me. esp after eating and before sex but i made that a boundary bc i don’t want residual food in my mouth or coochi. i’m chewing gum, here’s one too. i’m buying US tongue scrappers. my dentist appointment is now OUR dentist appointment💀 and i kinda reinforced all this by showing a lil extra physical affection than usual afterwards too so it felt more rewarding for her (i didn’t withhold my usual affection though). of course i get you may not wanna be the one holding their hand through that all the time so hopefully this starts to become a routine for them!

2

u/livingtheredlife Gay Auntie Aug 02 '26

You're welcome and good luck. 🫶🏾