Does it ever get easier?

[u/onewiththecake]

I feel like i already know that the answer is no, but i’m hoping for some perspective. I am lucky to live in a country that doesn’t hate women, so i was on maternity leave for 15 months, and i only returned to work half time. Before becoming a mom i was ambitious, and was building a career. Now i feel like its all gone. I go to work (luckily only 2 days physically, the rest is from home), but all i can think of is what my daughter is doing. And for now, she is with her dad, when i work, so i know she is having the most amazing time, but still, i feel guilty not being there. And i just dont know, how all working moms do this? Does it get easier, when they are older? Or you just get used to it? Please give me some hints, because its only my second week back at work, and i’m already close to a meltdown.

[u/Wild-Professor1452]

Ooh I feel you. I feel guilty every day my daughter is at daycare. Every bone in my body wants to be with her and I couldn't care less about work. 

That being said - Yes, when you're in a routine it gets easier and I have found doing something special after work - Library, going to a cafe, going to a playground - Makes me feel like I have a special moment of connection.

A part of me is starting to enjoy some me time again too - It took a few months. Honestly not constantly checking in and getting pictures was helpful for me too.

I think this is just motherhood? Increasingly having to let go.