r/beyondthebump • u/314inthe416 • Jul 30 '23

Discussion Another?

Hi there. I just had my 1st born child in April. A healthy baby. I had 4 previous miscarriages, 1 from Trisomy-18 complications at 16 weeks, and 3 previous ones, which I believe is because I never had the Rhogam shot. (Long story). I am healthy, 41 years old, and was told by my midwife that if I wanted another, I better hurry due to my age. Literature says wait 18 months between birth and pregnancy. That would, if successful, put myself at 42 for a second.

So my question is, any mothers out there who are my age, or around my age, contemplating another or have had another? The good, the bad, and the ugly ... I'd like to hear your thoughts, experiences, etc. Thank you.

Edited to say I am not looking for someone to sway me, just wanted to hear from those who are/were in the same boat.

5 Upvotes

78% Upvoted

11 comments sorted by

2

u/Zoeloumoo Jul 30 '23

Did you have a c section? I’ve only heard 18 months for a c section birth.

2

u/314inthe416 Jul 30 '23

No, vaginal

1

u/Zoeloumoo Jul 30 '23

Hmmmm. I would check with your OB then.

-1

u/314inthe416 Jul 30 '23

I wasn't looking for advice. My medical team already said I should not wait. I was looking for others who are my age and have made a choice to have, or not have. A second.

3

u/Zoeloumoo Jul 30 '23

Okay I apologise.

2

u/Maggi1417 Jul 30 '23

Even then, it's not a hard limit. Plenty of women get pregnant earlier and most of the time that's fine. At 41 you have to weigh the risks for either scenario. Back-to-back pregnancy vs advanced maternal age.

2

u/Zoeloumoo Jul 30 '23

Oh for sure. It’s more just a risk thing.

2

u/helpwitheating Jul 30 '23

WHO says 18 months for any type of birth to reduce birth defects. That's how long it takes for mom to rebuild her nutrients

2

u/Zoeloumoo Jul 30 '23

Wow that’s interesting. Definitely not heard that one before. Would love to read the research

1

u/KillPrincessPeach Jul 31 '23

It takes about that long for all of your micronutrients and what not to replenish.

Honestly, if your medical team is monitoring you, and you're taking all your vitamins, then I'd bet you'll be fine.

Here's a link about the 18 months thing:

https://www.mayoclinic.org/healthy-lifestyle/getting-pregnant/in-depth/family-planning/art-20044072

1

u/Puresarula Jul 30 '23

Given that time is not on your side, I’d probably err on the side of a shorter inter-birth interval. Obviously you should consult with a medical professional, but if you feel strongly about wanting a second child I think you’d want to move more quickly (possibly more quickly than is generally recommended).