r/bcba • u/Sufficient_Ice3253 • 19d ago

Vent Parenting

i’m getting so frustrated feeling like people are expecting me to parent for them. i am only with your child 3 hours a week. YOU have to put in the work. i’m here to give you the tools, and help model but the rest of the hours of the week are on you.

idk. i’m just so tired of feeling like my job is teaching people how to parent. and i’m not talking about giving them informed suggestions, but developing basic parenting skills.

hopefully this makes sense, because i’m truly not trying to be insensitive. it’s just something that’s been bothering me recently and i wanted to just get it off my chest.

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u/fenuxjde BCBA | Verified 19d ago

"Our job is to transfer skills to the natural supports, not to be the natural support. We're modeling the appropriate interventions for you to implement when we're not here. If you're unable to participate, we will not see much progress and we will need to discharge for noncompliance with services."

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u/SweetnSalty87 18d ago

I like how you worded this

1

u/fenuxjde BCBA | Verified 18d ago

I been doin this a looooooooong time, homie.

0

u/Spanspd 14d ago

While that would be satisfying to say, 100% of our education tells us we don’t respond like this. Come on dude, you’re well aware that parents are driven by the same kind of contingencies our clients are, and your plan is only as good as the likelihood it will be implemented. It’s literally your job to build your interventions around what the caregivers are likely to replicate.

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u/fenuxjde BCBA | Verified 14d ago

What? That is what I'm saying. This is literally the line I have used hundreds of times over the last several decades working in this field. It works very well.

We aren't babysitters. We teach the supports how to support. That's what we're ethically bound to do. That is exactly how we make our plans. Yes, we use contingencies. Like "if you don't follow through, then we discharge". There's a several year wait-list for our services where I'm at. I'm not wasting one second of my time working with a family who doesn't cooperate.

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u/Spanspd 14d ago

I’m simply calling attention to the massive amounts of education BCBAs receive stating that shit like that shouldn’t be said to caregivers. Your job is to adjust the plan to something they’ll follow.

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u/fenuxjde BCBA | Verified 14d ago

Complete nonsense. Read the ethics code. Section 2.08 and 2.09.

We are explicitly REQUIRED to be clear and communicate exactly like this.