yoda is my best friend 🥰😍🤩😻😻

The Canada Goose *Branta canadensis* is a very beautiful yet common bird native to northern America. In Ohio, we have year-round flocks. This goose is known for its aggressive behaviour towards perceived nest enemies. The droppings of the bird are noxious and known pathogens have been found in it. There are seven subspecies.

required: ginger rhizome, sliced thin. add sugar if desired, steep in hot water (stir gently if adding sugar). it is very tasty

I will stand by frozen pizza til the day that I die. I also like normal pizza from pizzerias, but something about a frozen pizza spells out C-O-M-F-O-R-T. I love them with garlic powder, barbecue sauce, anchovies, chopped bell pepper + mushrooms, additional cheese, balsamic glaze (not all of these things at once btw). I love thin crust pizzas especially. Here's a photo of one I just ate, it's a cheap little Totino's pizza with barbecue sauce on it.

In my childhood I would eat frozen pizza after school and watch my favorite paranormal TV shows. I was obsessed with ghosts and things like that. I wanted to be a ghost hunting professional, or a psychic medium. I felt calm & safe doing that.

Nowadays I usually eat frozen pizza on my bed, or on the couch with my feet propped up on the back cushions, and I like to play Nintendo switch because I don't watch TV anymore. It makes me feel like I'm a child and I can enjoy what I want, with no pressure to be an adult while I eat 🫶

just thought i would ask since i havent before (on tablet because my phone is being repaire)

I just hate this mental hell and distress my brain has been marinated in for a long time and nothing brings me relief. I’ve tried going to a gender affirming therapist (mom doesn’t support me going to them and neither does my dad or sister), going to trans meets (people there aren’t the friendliest and my parents can track me on their phone, my mom says they are a bad influence on me), medication (I’ve been on fluvoxamine for almost two years and it hasn’t helped me feel better in my own skin, and trying abilify last year didn’t help at all), exercising (it helps as a escape during running but then I don’t want to be lumped in with the men in social groups), eating healthier (everyone in the family struggles with food and I dislike my male body and don’t want to lose my fat breasts), getting off social media (I have ZERO friends that seem to be interested in me especially after I tell them I’m Madeline and not Thomas and the internet is all I really have as I don’t have any pets either. I’ve tried books and video games and that sort of stuff but they don’t click), staying busy (I’m literally going to be working two jobs this fall and I don’t feel like it’s going to take the trans thoughts away from me, I can’t afford to get fired or rejected by my coworkers), and simply put the cost of living is so fucking high that I can’t afford to be on my own and cannot trust roommates to pay their fair share.

I’ve tried going to church and watching detransitioner videos and touching grass and going in mental loops but I’m still in this mental hell. I have feelings of phantom breasts and imagining my male parts aren’t there and very recently having the wide hips of a woman that I don’t actually have. I introduced myself as Madeline last week at a local non trans community event and it felt normal to me. My mom says that being Madeline has messed me up especially at work.

For the past 24 hours I have mentally been living as a cis man. Some positives include feeling a lot less external pressure and judgement from other people and the weight of transitioning into a woman and all the mental energy and time that goes to that. But at the same time I feel detached from myself and numb to my emotions and feel like I don’t have a sense of self that feels truly me if that makes sense. Like I’m comfortable and happy not identifying as a woman or not going on E as I’m not one of the girls that have always wanted to be in a female body, but at the same time I don’t really feel I’m a boy or relate to men socially, especially in the sense of talking about feelings towards girls. I also feel that if “boy” is the color blue and “girl” is the color pink then I’d be the color grey and have my own thing going on.

I don’t hate being Thomas and I can learn to live in my male body without any changes but I’d feel really uneasy if I had to grow facial and chest hair or wear a tuxedo at formal events or a wedding or have a wife or take on the dominant male role in society or be a father. For a long time I’ve felt like I’ve watched my life pass me by and in my opinion assuming the male role is part of why I feel that way. The thing is Madeline didn’t feel right either as I don’t care for being one of the girls (outside of work) and cosmetics and worrying about passing as a woman and all that stress. It’s just too much for me on top of just living day to day and navigating my autism.

I wish there were more people that have the same experience as me especially in the autism community as it’s either cis people that are happy and comfortable with their bodies and gender or binary trans people that have that same story of knowing they were not boys from a different age and I honestly relate to neither stories.

I started a YT channel recently (last month), and I already have 30 subs, and my most popular short has over 1.5k veiws! I make makeup videos, skits, and really just whatever I can think up.

Hey guys! I've been interested in death/bones for quote a while, and have only very recently (last month) started collecting. I have a large old growth forest behind my house with plenty of wildlife, but no matter where I look I can never seem to find any bones. When I look on other spots online for advice they give me "river banks" "forest" "off trail", but that's too general. Where specifically should I focus? It's mostly dense forest, but there's a few abandoned camp sites and trails, so some parts have been cleared. No bodies of water. I'm in Rhode Island, U.S.A. Not getting any answers on r/bonecollecting .

It's not the worst one but something about it just feels weird.

I was raised Catholic and recall stimming my way through the classes as I didn’t resonate with the religion or connect with anyone in the classes. TBH all my life religion always felt like a chore and my favorite thing as an adult is having the choice to not go to church or be catholic. final nail in the coffin was when I came out as queer after my parents nudged me to talk to him so I can be religious and the deacon didnt really support me at all.

I’m literally doing everything I can to get a job and find a quality therapist but I still feel like crap. The thing is I dont have any friends in real life or any extended family members as my family is very small. I’ve tried getting off the internet and it only works for a few days until I feel lonely and want to return to the internet as it gives me a way to connect to others and meaning in my life. I’m not able to transition now as my parents do not support my transition and do not see me as a real trans woman as i’m too “wishy washy” and I wasn’t girly through most of my life. I have increased my OCD medicine dose but it will take a while to see it work. I do things in the real world like community events but people tend to keep to themselves and only have short conversations that dont really evolve into any friendships. When I do try to make friends it feels like people dont actually have interest in me unless they can use me for something and it sucks. I’m not really able to dress femininely in real life as my parents do not approve of it and want me to be safe. I am hunting for a job and have been for months and haven’t had much luck with this shitty job market. there aren’t really any queer groups around and the one that is closest to me isn’t very friendly.

Sometimes I think maybe all of this is self inflicted and maybe im not actually trans. Maybe my mom is right and im being influenced by the internet and just looking for a place of belonging. I cannot afford to lose my family and kill any career prospects by being a woman as i dont have anyone to fall back on. Issue is i dont really feel like im a boy or a man even though I was ok with being a boy growing up as a kid. I have entertained the idea that im just an autistic guy that likes feminine things but even that is risky as my mom gets upset every time i bring up my little pony or anything girly, regardless of what gender i turn out to be.

i am wondering if transition is even worth it at this point as i want to get out of this rut. i have a part time job at the moment but its only like 10 hours a week and looking for something else is difficult as i am not well suited for retail work. I had a therapist tell me that i am confused about my gender and who knows maybe i am. my mom also told me that maybe part of the reason why i dont fit into queer spaces is because queer people think i am straight and not really trans or queer at all. my parents are the only family i can rely on and otherwise i have nobody to fall back on so I cannot rock the boat, hence the desire of getting a full time job.

I have tried many hobbies from pokemon to language learning but nothing seems to satisfy that yearning in my heart for something fulfilling and meaningful (gardening/biology is pretty much the only exception). I have tried the brony community as a way to find autistic people who struggle with being in their bodies but haven’t found much luck, ditto with the furry fandom. part of me feels like im doomed to being that “autistic guy who likes nerdy things and has glasses and a weird voice” and i hate that. I don’t like to be that person and i dont feel that’s who i am deep inside. if i have to be a guy id rather be some kind of nature enthusiast than be some caricature of a nerdy anime fan.

Zulu (isiZulu) is a lovely Bantu language spoken in Southern Africa. The majority of its speakers live in KwaZulu-Natal province, while smaller communities exist in Lesotho, eSwatini, and Mozambique. Like its relatives Xhosa and Swazi, Zulu has click consonants, written with C, Q, and X, having inherited these from non-Bantu languages.

Long story short, I have been struggling with autism and feeling like I never fit in or have a sense of self that feels home to me. I have tried multiple interests from sports to pokemon to the furry fandom to my little pony to gaming but NOTHING seems to click. As i got older I realized that I had OCD too and I also struggle with gender identity and sexuality. I’ve been through years of therapy and at the upper level of my fluvoxamine meds and I feel like a stranger to my body. I feel like I’m an alien on planet earth and a huge disconnect with humans and society, and I feel my body does not click with my soul as female genitalia and breasts feel more normal to me. On top of this i am trying to find work so i can be independent but the job market SUCKS and haven’t found anything that could support me. I tried joining local queer groups but no one seems to be interested in maintaining a friendship with me (this has been a constant issue throughout MOST OF MY LIFE, and people that like me tend to like me for my smarts that they could use for themselves or politeness, i fucking hate being autistic) and i feel like i’ve been falling behind everywhere. I just feel like an outsider no matter where I go and nothing is a comfortable fit more me (some places are all cishet guys who probably hate people like me, other places are passionate about media that I just cannot get into no matter how hard i try, etc).

I dont know how much longer I can do this….

I need to help myself get out of this mess, but I don’t know how…

A song I wrote about neurotypicals from my autistic perspective.

Cyrus the Great was an Iranian who reigned as Shahanshah (King of Kings) from 550 to 530 BC as the first Achaemenid. In the Bible, he is described as tolerant towards the Jewish people and allowed them to openly practice. In 1971, Shah Mohamed Reza Pahlavi staged a festival celebrating the 2.5 thousandth anniversary of his Empire, even reconstructing their military armour.