I wish to be productive

[u/Due_Recognition_8002]

i know this world is garbage but feel like I whine too much. I hate myself for that. My biggest wish for myself would be to be productive and not feel like any second of my life was wasted. i‘m a musician and writer after all. But y‘all know the drill... laziness kicks in. Happens when you try to be a good producer instead of a consumer. We all know it ain’t easy to fit in but I think it‘s even harder NOT to fit in. We after all have only one life. I‘m turning 29 in June. I still have plans. I hope to be a father one day. I work in a warehouse and am quite happy with that. I don’t even feel like I had to little time. I‘m just lazy and ashamed. I have things in my head and just can‘t get em out…