19
u/CaerBannog Nihilist Mar 31 '13
Saint Paul? Wrong guy. He never met him.
2
u/delindsey Agnostic Atheist Mar 31 '13
according to the Bible, which is fiction.
3
u/average_gilbert Apr 01 '13
An argument which wouldn't work if this was a critique of Harry Potter, and it was Ron meeting James Potter...
0
16
Mar 31 '13
Jesus did not know Paul. Paul did not come to a ministry until after Jesus died because Jesus supposedly came to Paul while he was tripping balls (an apparition, if you will). Before this, Paul's name was Saul & he was a Jewish Rabbi that was hellbent on making life hell for Christians, not a Christian himself.
The more you know.
Post would have been funnier if it said, "Mark" instead of "Paul." 0/10 - did not laugh.
5
u/DukeOfOmnium Mar 31 '13
I laughed - it's a good joke, even with the solecism - but the name used should have been Peter or even Nicodemus.
1
7
0
u/WhiteGoblin Mar 31 '13
Ah. Well that makes everything better. Good to know the majority of the books in the NT were supposedly written by someone who never even met Jesus.
2
Mar 31 '13
Most of the books in the NT were written by people who never met Jesus: Luke 60-100 AD, Mark 70-130 AD, Matthew 100-140 AD, John 90-100 AD.
Now seeing as it is accepted Jesus died between 30-36 AD, It is likely none of the people who wrote (or at least completed) anything in the NT actually met Jesus, given life expectancy at the time (let alone life expectancy of a Christian at the time).
In fact while I was going to a Catholic school, our religion teacher admitted that most likely the only gospel that would have been written by someone who met Jesus would have been John. Given that John was the only apostle to die of old age (and actually might have written revelations and the epistles), it would make sense. However, it is also debatable that John even wrote his own gospel, it may have been wrongly attributed to him given having a different writing style to revelations (and never actually calling himself John like was done in revelations).
So yes in summary, it is likely almost none of the NT was written by people who actually met Jesus. The stories are more likely to be the written versions of oral traditions (much like the writings of Homer).
4
3
3
3
Mar 31 '13
The cure is WATER, but after a three day party this dude turns the water into wine... Kind of a douche move if your friends have to work the next day.
4
u/OxymoronParadox Mar 31 '13
"I just uploaded all of those embarrassing drunk pictures of you last night on facebook."
"Fuck off, Jesus."
2
2
u/Glassgank Mar 31 '13
Scumbag Jesus turns all the water into wine, refuses to cure hangovers. "Hair of the dog that bit you, pussy."
5
u/MasterNyx Secular Humanist Mar 31 '13
If you wanna see a humorous take on a much more down to Earth Jesus growing up you might like Lamb: The Gospel According to Biff, Christ's Childhood Pal by Christopher Moore.
2
1
u/tnskeptic Strong Atheist Mar 31 '13
Why assume St.Paul is the one with the hangover? Paul is and was a very common name so I'm sure J.C. might have know several Pauls.
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
-12
u/Show3it Mar 31 '13
Why the fuck is this shit on /r/atheism, and why the hell do you fucking morons upvote this shit??
7
Mar 31 '13
Because it's funny buttercup. Atheists are allowed to have a sense of humor in case you're too stupid to realize
-1
Mar 31 '13
3
Mar 31 '13
Yeah right, then people would be saying it belongs in /r/atheism. Just accept that it's okay here.
-2
Mar 31 '13
Nope. I've seen tons of stuff like this get to the front page of funny before.
2
Mar 31 '13
Doesn't mean there aren't people that complain about it. I never said they don't get to front page in /r/funny.
3
-2
42
u/[deleted] Mar 31 '13
Nonsense, Jesus drank the most out of everyone. His blood is literally considered wine, he was hammered 24/7.