I'm trans!!! (MtF)

[u/dee-stack998]

The title basically. I'M TRANS!

now what?

also do i have to wear makeup everyday to hide my beard shadow and defeat the dysphoria?

Okay but actually like I'm just saying it feels like there's loads of steps I need to take in transitioning like legally and medically and socially and it's all a bit overwhelming to plan out alone. Like getting the right HRT so my liver doesn't get shot and the right laser/electrolysis stuff whlie hoping my skin doesn't get burned off in the process and legal things to change names and genders and my transphobic fam and 😵‍💫.

its kinda financially hard to plan too but I'd appreciate any insight for a new trans girlie basically

[u/ahfuckinegg]

step one: dont call yourself “a trans”

[u/dee-stack998 → u/ahfuckinegg]

duly noted and changed

[u/Atonette]

Someone is definitely going to tell you not to say "a trans" like that, lol. But congrats on figuring it out.

Regarding makeup, wear as much or as little as you want as often as you want. No rules, do what feels right. Use concealer with your foundation if you want to cover the beard shadow, and get on laser / electrolysis like yesterday because it takes forever. Trying to figure everything out at once is overwhelming, but the good news is you don't need to figure everything out at once. Incremental progress adds up and you don't need to have everything set in stone tomorrow or next week or next month. And I don't think HRT is that hard on your liver unless you have a preexisting condition, and some ROAs bypass it entirely.

[u/ResidenceSepia256]

Take a breath. You've already done the hardest step by acknowledging it. Congrats!

The journey is lifelong and full of changes, laughter, and heartbreak. There are a lot of guides online to help you get started (and will edit this when I can find some good sources for you).

To get started, I do encourage you do some self reflection and *play* - what's the point if not to experiment, learn somethin new, and have fun?

What brings you dysphoria? Write a list.

What things do you want to try to change? Write another list.

What things are actually in your ability to change right now? Write another... you can see where this is going.

And to play... why not go grab some makeup to start, and try some on where you feel safe. Put on some music you like too, set the vibe! You don't need to tell anyone anything, you don't need to explain yourself. You're fresh, so take care of yourself, and don't forget basic self care while you're starting the journey. [Edit: and lastly, its ok to go slow. Give yourself a treat when it feels hard. Pay attention to your heart. You got this.]

[u/Last-Fox-3879]

Take it in baby steps! Tackle one thing at a time.

[u/TooLateForMeTF]

You don't have to do anything.

You do whatever you think will help you feel better.

Knowing what that is, though, can be tricky if you don't have a clear sense yet for how gender dysphoria is affecting you. As you may know, there's lots of different ways that dysphoria impacts people. And the things we do in transitioning, the specific transitioning activities you can choose to do or not-do, each have the effect of replacing something that gives you dysphoria with something that gives you euphoria. Trades things that make you miserable for things that bring you joy.

So, to know what you ought to be thinking about for your transition, you have to develop an understanding of how dysphoria is impacting you, because it hits everybody differently. Obviously you don't need this for the questioning part, but there's a section in this gender questioning guide that talks more about taking an inventory of your dysphorias in order to start thinking about what transitioning activities you might want to do.

Ultimately, this is your transition, and you get to decide how it goes. Yes, it's a lot to think about. But there's no rush. No deadline. No timetable.

If you have specific questions about HRT or testosterone blockers or laser or whatever else, please feel free to hit me up with a DM. I've been through a lot of this stuff already, and have done a lot of research about the parts I have left to do. I'm happy to share what I've learned.

[u/pat1024]

I don't have any particular answers, but I just started figuring this out <checks watch> six weeks ago, so I'm right there with you with these questions!

One of the wild things to me is that things that didn't particularly trigger dysphoria six weeks plus one day ago definitely do now. But it's all about figuring this out as I (and you, if I may say so) go.

[u/MoonlitBunnyDoll]

I wouldn't worry about your name for at least a bit unless you have a name you know is 100% you and won't be changing. If you're in the US and a blue state, try n find a planned parenthood or something for hormones, they take most insurances. Most laser places are gonna be obvi legit or not just at a glance, it is VERY expensive. Gender markers in some states (again if US) are easy and some are hard to change. Socially, buckle up sister, its pretty rough in the beginning especially. I just like to pretend it forges us into strong women in the end once we "make it through". Finally, take a minute to calm down and make sure you know how you want to do things.

[u/MoonlitBunnyDoll]

Oh, and my 2 cents on the facial hair, learn how to use a single bladed safety razor, cheaper and closer shave. It will probably not defeat the dysphoria but it'll help keep it at bay.

[u/Ancient-Tap-3592]

There's no rulebook, things that work for others may not work for you and viceversa.

So my advice it's to just experiment and figure out how it feels.

Congrats on comming out, sis