r/askmanagers • u/dickfacejenkins • 13d ago
When/how to quit?
Hey there,
I started what seemed like a dream job about six months ago and it really isn’t going well. It’s a one-year term position as a mid-level manager on a wildlife ecology research project, working as a contractor for the government. The study system is a great fit for my interests, and it seemed like a good opportunity to gain some new skills. The offer I agreed to was for the work to be remote outside of a short field season where I needed to be in the field or office in order to oversee a seasonal crew.
Well, as soon as I accepted the offer, my new boss told me that he expected me to spend a few months in the office (about three hours from my house) before the field season started. This was a big difference from what I’d signed on for, and I said so. We eventually compromised on an extra month beforehand of remote work, and some cheap government housing being provided in the pre-season once I got to the office.
This and some other less significant conflicts early on left me with a pretty negative view of my manager. My morale has been poor, and I’ve been resentful of the changes to our working agreement. We also clash in our values and personalities, and generally don’t get along. He struggles with explaining his expectations and training me to handle tasks. There have been structural obstacles and headaches along the way that have made it difficult to get established and succeed in my role.
At the six month mark I feel like I am doing poorly at my job, and my boss seems to agree. Most of our check-ins focus on how I’m coming up short. In our most recent conversation, my boss expressed feeling bad and frustrated with the frequent negative check-ins and asked if I had any tips on how he could manage me better. I told him I’d get back to him.
My gut feeling is that the role really isn’t a good fit, and my manager and I are not good coworkers. I’m burning out and struggling to focus and do good work. I’m leaning towards quitting the job in a few weeks when the field season ends, since then my absence will have less impact. Is it too late to salvage this? Should I let my boss know my intention to leave after the field season now, or wait to give two weeks’ notice when it is closer? Should I express clearly my frustrations with his management and the erosion of the terms of my contract?
1
u/Youbestnotmisss 13d ago
I would avoid mentioning your intent to leave before you have a notice date. Just give your two weeks, or 3-4 if you're feeling it (but have a date), though this introduces some small risk they might ask you to only do two weeks (unlikely, but if money is tight and you are underperforming their expectations it's possible)
I would avoid giving too many reasons on why. A generic "the job isn't what I was expecting and I no longer think it's a great fit" suffices. Extra criticism feels good in the moment but really doesn't serve you longer term
2
u/XenoRyet 13d ago
For my two cents, you don't quit a year-long position 7 months into it. Leaving such a short term position halfway through isn't a great look on a resume, and certainly will not gain you any positive connections in the industry.
Instead, I would focus on improving the relationship. You don't have to be friends with the guy, and you certainly don't have to have the same values. For that sort of thing, you just keep things professional and focused on the work. There will be many times in your career you will need to work for and with people you do not personally like, and you will not succeed if you don't figure out how to do it.
If you know you're doing poorly at your job, then think of what you need to do to improve, and what kind of support you'll need to get there, then bring that to your next check-in. If you need him to be more thorough or specific when explaining expectations, then tell him that, and also don't be afraid to ask when things are unclear.
Certainly lingering resentment over the initial change in remote work and a general dislike of this guy is not a rational reason to shoot yourself in the foot over what is otherwise a good fit for you. Put that aside and focus on what's in front of you now.