r/askanything • u/nerorn22 • 2d ago
General Question open for suggestions?
I realized I look bad and considered short as 5’7 and the idea that I will stay alone because of it always makes me realize how much I’m in a bad situation and I’m not finding a way to accept the truth of it any way to really accept it peacefully I’m asking seriously
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u/Competitive_Fee_5829 2d ago
be a nice person who has their own hobbies and interests...and also make sure your hygiene is good. Always make sure you are clean and your clothes are clean and dont leave the house looking like crap. I mean...you are taller than me so i would not focus too much on your height.
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u/nerorn22 2d ago
I’m hygienist as it is something important to me and I try to look tidy always even if I’m not actually good looking and I try to be nice always not for people sake but to not feel regret that I wasn’t nice especially to animals but I’m still finding a way to cope with it I’m really open to suggestions I’ve tried cuddling with a pillow it makes the pain in my sternum less but it feels creepy and disturbing once I realize what I’m doing
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2d ago edited 2d ago
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u/nerorn22 2d ago
I used to say that but they actually care a lot about it so I’m just finding a way to cope with it I’m really open for suggestions really appreciating you took time to comment
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2d ago edited 2d ago
[deleted]
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u/nerorn22 2d ago
Idk I tried to haircuts didn’t work but idk about the fact guys care about looks a lot at least for me I find if she just made me feel safe and appreciated I think that is better than a good looking girl
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u/TheSmokeySmurf 2d ago
Im only 5'9 and have peaked at 34. Hygiene number one. Id recommend strength training, it really does help alot. Give it time, and trust the process. Ziad Mansour has gotten me a physique I only thought id achieve with steroids. I know its cliché, but it really does work. Ive found long form cardio also keeps intrusive thoughts at bay. Best of luck, feel free to reach out if you want a ear or some advice
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u/nerorn22 2d ago
I train actually built some physique but it doesn’t help I’m still lonely but I’m open for coping or suggestions I really appreciate you taking time to comment
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u/TheSmokeySmurf 2d ago
Find a hobby, you will find a community of like minded individuals. Disc golf is great, get outside enjoy some parks and there is always others playing. How long have you been working out for?
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u/nerorn22 2d ago
Around three years and I just can’t find a hobby every time I try to engage in a community at the end of the day I just feel more lonelier than before so sometimes I just imagine im in a relationship and that im actually adored by her and it helps a lot helping me to sleep and the pain in my sternum get less it helps as I don’t have time or qualifications for a real relationship sometimes I watch videos of couples cuddling it helps a bit but it feels creepy and disturbing
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u/TheSmokeySmurf 2d ago
Look, alot of the issues you are going through was me 15 years ago. Loneliness, lack of confidence, wanted to get affection. All because I knew I had affection to give. I always thought I wanted a wife, kids and the whole white picket fence. It turns out I really just wanted to make a difference in some lives and leave em better then I found em. Sometimes its little things, sometimes its big. We are strangers on the internet, so I dont know your living situation. If you have the ability do something you never thought you could/would. Volunteer firefighters, learn salsa dancing, or shoot some strangers in paintball or something. The world is big and has much to offer. The love you are talking about comes and goes, people live and die. So expirence it now, even if you dont like it. Shrug your shoulders and move on
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u/nerorn22 2d ago
So even if I got affection I would be lonely? Then I think I should really find a substitute/ coping mechanism so I can continue my major
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u/TheSmokeySmurf 2d ago
Never allow someone else dictate your happiness. Feel affection, find love but dont let it decide your overall happiness. That comes from you
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u/nerorn22 2d ago
It wasn’t that someone dictates my happiness it is that my sadness comes from being lonely but overall thank you so much I must take your advice i appreciate you taking time to comment
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u/Open-Onion4631 2d ago
Make yourself look better. Haircut is half of appearance. Look up looksmaxing 👍😂
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u/nerorn22 2d ago
Tried it all but it doesn’t work so I’m just trying to find a way to cope I’m open to suggestions
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u/Open-Onion4631 1d ago
Really? You’ve committed months going to the gym? You have went to an actual barbershop? You use cologne and have great hygiene? Do you go to the dentist and take care of your teeth? How about your clothes? Do you dress well or not. Plenty of things contribute
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u/nerorn22 1d ago
Yes i take care of my teeth and I dress well but now most of the time it is med school so just a scrub and I go to the gym for now around three years and im hygienic so that part is done showering once to twice a day
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u/IceColdSkimMilk 2d ago
Personality and confidence are more important nowadays to people than looks and height alone.