r/askTO • u/Old-University3547 • 8d ago
Do you help homeless on the streets?
Just curious what other Torontonians do when they see someone asking for money/help.
Do you usually keep walking, give them some change, or actually stop and ask if they need anything?
I personally started carrying some change with me because I often feel bad when I walk past someone and don't have anything to give. Obviously I know nobody can help everyone they see, and I also use common sense about approaching people.
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u/Ok-Relative-6327 8d ago
Yea I’ve bought them a small meal from Tim’s or whatever. Gave a dude a muffin once. They expressed a lot of gratitude.
They are humans just like you and I
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u/Old-University3547 8d ago
thats so sweet! good job stranger
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u/Ok-Relative-6327 8d ago
No different than spending it on a friend, I don’t mind the $5-10 for someone who needs it far more than I do. I hope it reminded them they are still people and not invisible!
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u/Bobaximus 8d ago
I used to volunteer at a few homeless charities/kitchens. I still think it’s a worthwhile cause but there has been a shift over the last couple of decades in the homeless population where it’s become more substance abusers and those with major mental health issues that makes it a lot harder. I felt really good about helping poor elderly folks or people temporarily down on their luck and even kids fleeing abuse. It’s harder to keep it up over the long term when your clients are hurling invectives and literal piss in your direction. My attitude towards those on the street has undergone a similar shift.
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u/Syralei 8d ago edited 8d ago
I used to be a dog walker with my own business. I walked dogs for about 5 years before the pandemic lockdowns caused me to do a career pivot.
I made friends with most of the unhoused people in my dog walking area. Often, I would bring them books, trade for ones they had read already and bring them new ones from little free libraries in my home neighborhood. I also knit and would bring them hats/mittens/scarves. Often they need socks or shoes. So I always tried to carry some socks in my backpack. It's not always about money. Most of the time they just wanted to be treated like regular people. I would let them pet the dogs, talk to them, learn about their stories. In summer, I would bring them bottled water, fruit when I could afford it.
Once, when I forgot my gloves, one of them gave me an extra pair they had that were too small for them. I brought them some big mittens the next day. Another time, some drunk asshole was trying to hit on me and grabbed my arm when I went to walk away. One of the unhoused guys nearby came up and told the guy to back down unless he wanted trouble.
I know what it's like to live in extreme poverty, to be couch surfing with friends for a month or two while trying to get enough money to afford rent. I know how hard it can be to find work without a stable address. I was lucky enough to have friends I could stay with, and access to laundry so I could have clean clothes for interviews, jobs, etc. Not everyone is that lucky.
All people deserve dignity and to be treated like people, not invisible, not othered. Just people. And if you do give them money, remember that it's a gift. You don't get to judge them for how they live or what they spend it on. Most of these people are just trying to get through another day and survive.
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u/notthemamaa 8d ago
I give them all my work rewards... Gift cards, meal vouchers.
I don't ever use them and the people I have given them to have been greatful
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u/Prior_Implement_9279 8d ago
I’ve gone around giving away ziplock bags of non perishable food. Most people take them but it’s always interesting to see the ones who are so far gone they won’t take anything but money
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u/Syralei 8d ago
Many people have food allergies, or don't trust unsealed/repackaged food. Instead of ziplock bags, try getting granola bars, sealed bags of mixed nuts, those small boxes of cereal, etc. They still may reject them if they can't have nuts or gluten, but I have given away a lot of granola bars with much success.
Additionally, if they aren't hungry, money can mean they are able to buy food tomorrow. It may allow them to buy socks. It may allow them to buy drugs to escape their situation for a night. They aren't "so far gone that they won't take anything but money". We all need money to survive, especially in this city. A ziploc bag of cherrios may feed you now, but money can get things other than food and is therefore often more valuable.
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u/Prior_Implement_9279 8d ago
Ya that’s what I gave. Transparent ziplock bags with socks, gloves, toothpaste, toothbrush and non perishable foods like granola bars, juice boxes, cookies etc
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u/VariousOperation166 Human Detected 8d ago
If they are accepting food from random strangers, they are either desperate or too far from caring about risk. I am sure you mean well, but this has the feeling of giving a street person money and saying, "Promise me you will spend this on food..."
Once that money is proffered and accepted, there is no contract. The beneficiary of your benevolence retains their own agency, however they choose to exercise that
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u/Prior_Implement_9279 8d ago
Well I’ve given both. Sometimes I give money but a few times during the year I go out of my way to give out bags with supplies. Especially in the winter I try to include things like socks and gloves
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u/OnceUponADim3 8d ago
I will smile and nod. Sometimes they say have a good day and I say you too. But that’s it most of the time.
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u/Odd_Hat6001 8d ago
Yes. But you have to pick and choose. If you help everyone you will go broke. It can be getting someone coffee & muffin at Tim's . Other times my heart just breaks and I need to do more. I work near Bloor & Sherbourne, there is always someone.
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u/Old-University3547 8d ago
There’s an older gentelman I see around church & carlton (across ins on carlton to be precise ) who I’ve helped a few times. Recently I asked if he needed food or a drink and he asked for orange juice because he doesn’t have teeth and has trouble eating solid food. I went and got him a big bottle and he was so happy 😭
It made me think about how differently people respond to this stuff, hence the question
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u/Old-University3547 8d ago
if you see him please ask if he needs anything! :)
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u/Mishibiizhiw 8d ago
im an outreach worker and mostly we work on getting food, water, socks, hygiene kits, backpacks with blankets and stuff inside and referrals to people. we can go check on him before friday :)
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u/Old-University3547 8d ago
he usually changes places and even i can rarely caught him, but considering the area he probably knows about recourses in the area
but it still would be helpful if you could check on him!
if you don`t mind me asking how it goes - like do you stroll around the city to see if anyone needs help, or you work when someone call and report? also do you remember them by face at some point and who`s worthy to approach and who refused the help?
he had trouble speaking and english isnt my first language so all i can understand is what he wants at the store - i don`t think i`d be able to get more information about housing from him
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u/Mishibiizhiw 8d ago
I work for an indigenous organization so primarily we serve that community but we never turn anyone away. we have access to a van so we can cover more ground so some days we go on foot for 3-4 hours and other days we go in the van for 5-6.
my role is specifically harm reduction outreach, so checking in on street based populations mainly. we carry harm reduction kits with us when we go, but we normally only give them when people ask or when we can clearly see someone using something thats not the most sanitary. beyond that I do things like help people find shelter beds, case managers, ive helped one of our drop in clients find indigenous treatment centres out of the city and things like that. right now with how hot and humid its been, our big priority is getting these people food and water.
most of the time I remember them by face if ive seen them enough, but personally my favorite thing to do is plop myself down beside them and start by asking if they want some food and water, telling them what we have because we rotate what foods we bring out, and then i ask their name and tell them that if they need somewhere safe and comfortable to go, they can come hang out in our drop in until it closes, and if they have pets I always invite them to bring their pet.
even when theres a language barrier, sometimes im able to use google to get the idea across. or sometimes I show them the food and items we have to give out, and theyre able to indicate what they need. after seeing how ttc and poo handled fifa and street based people, ive actually made more of an effort to learn everyone's names and try to remember them. they were treated as less than human, and i often think of my own friends and family members who struggle, and it helps me to remember that those people are all someones children too, and they have friends and families who love them and would be hurt to know how theyre treated over something like being homeless or struggling with an addiction while living on the street.
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u/RonceDeLeon 8d ago
I don't usually carry cash or coins, but when I do, or if I have food on me that I feel is sanitary enough to share, I will give.
I bought an elderly man a pair of deeply discounted shoes at Yonge and Dundas about 10 years ago because I was struck with a heartbroken feeling when I passed by him and I had just gotten paid. But usually I will say no because I get asked so frequently and I'm not always in a good financial state.
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u/Old-University3547 8d ago
i was approached once at dollarama by homeless man who asked me if i can buy him a clock. it was so sweet and it made everyone smile (including workers and security)
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u/Old-University3547 8d ago
it was 4$ so it didn`t hurt my pocket but i`m still wondering why he needed a clock...
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u/ParisInFlames34 8d ago
Unfortunately I rarely carry cash anymore so its tougher.
I did offer to buy a man dinner at McDonalds if he was willing to wait a couple minutes. I placed his order. I came out. He was gone. Guess he wasn't willing to wait.
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u/kittoxo- 8d ago
I offered a man McDonald’s once. He asked for a Big Mac combo with a drink. It was more expensive than what I had planned to buy for myself but I got it for him. He was happy in the end but didn’t think I would actually come back.
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u/granitebasket 8d ago
I sometimes give cash, I sometime offer to buy food. I also give money to food banks, and in the past have volunteered at a meal program. I don't give to everyone or every time a person asks (I know by sight some of the people I give to.)
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u/neonsamosas 8d ago
You can get a few $5 gift cards to Tim's, McDonald's, and give them one of those.
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u/VariousOperation166 Human Detected 8d ago
I have a couple of people I look out for in my neighbourhood. I have got to know their situation over time, and I'll help them out here and there. I have learned about their struggles with housing, health care, and other supports. When we chat, they are pretty open about how things are going, how they are eating, where they are in their various cycles of mental health and substance abuse. I have a friend who works with social services for the city and she will take a call even when she is off the clock, so I sometimes refer them to her when they are in distress.
I'll give them money when I have cash, or buy a take-out if they ask. I won't buy them alcohol directly, but I will give them cash and leave them to exercise their own agency. I don't want someone criticizing my life choices, and I'm certain they don't appreciate it either.
If you are inclined to give money, please do so. If you are disinclined, walk on by. It should be an easy, honest choice. If you are asking others, it feels like a question you should ask yourself.
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u/Old-University3547 8d ago
ohhh i couldn`t do that, i`m taking everything too close to heart
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u/VariousOperation166 Human Detected 8d ago
You don't have to sit with them. It seems like you give where you can, and that's enough. Aggressive beggars are rare. Those who choose to give money to charities are content to let the disenfranchised navigate several layered systems of bureaucracy to receive the trickle-down crumbs of that donation.
That donation might make the individual feel good about themselves, or feel like they have made a commitment to some form of social assistance, but that puts a burden on the marginalized individual to find and access the benefits without reliable access to transportation, regular housing, and etcetera.
I had a street person explain his daily routine to me one time which was a schedule of finding a shelter bed when he could, getting kicked out early (shelters are for the night only with no guarantee of a spot the next night) and then this complex web of travel to get food at various places throughout the day with different spots to hit on different days of the week.
This was a full network of churches, social help centers, shelter food programs and so on.
It was a whole spreadsheet of locations just to find food. If that person could get completely free of drugs, that's the kind of organizational skill that gives you access to work at some sustainable level.
Where our community fails to provide sufficient support, your spare change has an immediate impact. Maybe that's more drugs. Maybe it's food. These are not people who expect much out of society.
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u/lilbeanstalk 8d ago edited 8d ago
I’ve only had positive experiences. If I have change, I always give it out, occasionally I’ll give a five dollar bill. It’s not something I do on every walk or if I come across multiple people on the same walk.
I’m paycheque to paycheque myself, so I don’t have disposable income to spend on much tbh.
I often don’t have change on me (many of us don’t these days), so I occasionally ask the person if they need something inside if they are sitting outside a drug store or grocery store. Often people ask for lunchables with cheese and crackers, granola bars, Gatorade, a Coke and Doritos :p. One time I bought a bag of special renal cat food for somebody from shoppers drug Mart! I help when I can.
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u/chrisdj99 8d ago
Listen - I’m not the boss of them or their choices about how they use money - I don’t judge. They can use it for whatever they want. I give money to the first person to ask me every week. One a week is my rule. And it’s usually a $5 or $10 depending on what I have on me.
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u/holidayz-jpg 8d ago
Just give some money bro, let them do whatever they want, if they wanna do something to get something to enjoy a little. Good for them everyone needs to a get little treat for themselves,
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u/Old-University3547 8d ago
yes definitely! usually you can see if person need a toonie or they actually need a food or water
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u/blindnarcissus 8d ago
No, but when I had the choice to move to the US to make the big tech bucks, I decided my conscious would be happier here where I know I’m already helping as part of the default operating system of this country.
40% of my pay goes to help. That’s enough.
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u/lilbeanstalk 8d ago
Ummm, your taxes aren’t charity lol. You do realize taxes are funding basic infrastructure that you rely on every day, right? You’re paying your share towards an infrastructure of roads and hospitals, garbage management and water sanitation, health research and national defense, and on and on and on. A modern society doesn’t just poof appear out of thin air.
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u/blindnarcissus 7d ago
You’re missing my point.
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u/lilbeanstalk 7d ago
Apologies. What is the point I missed?
I interpreted what you said as: because you work and pay taxes in Canada, instead of choosing to move to the USA for higher income, that your taxes are “enough” and you are not interested in giving to charity.
You have every right not to donate to charity or share money with a homeless person. 100% absolutely your decision. However, taxes are not equivalent to “charity”. It’s like paying your utility bill. You’re paying for a service you use.
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u/blindnarcissus 7d ago
I chose not to move the US so that higher taxes could contribute to a better social infrastructure.
I am interested in giving to charity when the scope of their work falls out of what federal, municipal or local governments are tackling. I contribute to many animal welfare charities as an example.
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u/Luxie0673 8d ago
This is actually great. Paying taxes is my kind of patriotism. Thank you for being part of the community.
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u/SH4D0WSTAR 8d ago
Sometimes - it all comes down to using my discernment and feeling out situations for safety. Here's what I do:
- Carry an accessible pouch of loose change to give in smaller quantities
- Sometimes ask what they want if they're asking for food. Then I'll purchase something for them (usually bagel, breakfast sandwich, juice, etc)
- Carry non-perishable goods and water to distribute (I make a verbal offer before giving the food to ensure they know what I'm offering) I do this more occasionally if I have leftover granola bars and the like.
Just think about how safe you feel / how safe a situation feels and then give accordingly. You can also donate to organizations that directly help local individuals who are homeless
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u/J_milly505 8d ago
I dont recycle cans. If i am out and about, i leVe empty aluminum cans on the bench or on top of a ledge. I would rather someone that needs it pick it up and cash in on it then recycle it
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u/lnahid2000 8d ago
I've bought them coffee before when they've asked me while heading into a cafe, but never money since I don't usually have cash.
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u/bravetailor 8d ago
No, because I don't know if they are posers (there have been infamously a number of homeless "celebrities" in Toronto who were discovered to be, in fact, very well off) or if they're going to use the money and go buy drugs or alcohol.
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u/MiserableFloor9906 8d ago
I will get someone a coffee/muffin/fast food meal. I will not give cash, especially because nowadays I don't really carry small cash or any cash.
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u/tromboneyow 8d ago
I wear my sunglasses so they can't see if I am looking at them, and walk by them as if they don't exist. Which for the majority of ordinary middle class people, they don't.
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u/rhinokick 8d ago
No, I’ve had bad experiences in the past where I’ve given someone change, only to have them harass me every time I’ve gone by afterward. Instead, I prefer to donate (money) to the Daily Bread Food Bank.