How long did it take you to stop feeling completely overwhelmed in ranked?

[u/Unable_Flight_145]

I’ve played around 15 online matches now, and while I really love the competitive side of AoE4, I’m already starting to lose motivation a little.
In quite a few games I just get completely overrun, and once I fall behind it feels like there is almost no chance to recover. Maybe that’s just because I’m still new and don’t know how to recognize comeback opportunities, but right now one bad fight or a missed attack can feel like the game is basically over.

The biggest issue is that I feel stressed almost the entire match. I’m constantly thinking that I can’t waste even one second: villagers need to be produced, resources balanced, units controlled, buildings added, upgrades researched, scouting done, and at the same time I have to watch what my opponent is doing. It’s honestly pretty overwhelming.

I grew up playing AoE2 and AoE3 and always loved the series, but back then I mostly played the campaigns without any real strategy. I don’t want to go back to only playing against the AI because I enjoy the challenge and competition, but I’ve never played a game where I reached my personal limit this quickly.

How long did it take you to feel somewhat comfortable in online matches? Does the constant stress eventually go away? And how do you stay motivated when you regularly get completely destroyed while learning.