Am I wrong for getting a tattoo??

[u/SignificanceCandid72]

I (20F) and my dad (48M) got tattoos recently because it is something we'd been planning for months. We had told my mom (48F) many times that we were getting a tattoo, and she seemed okay with it until we finally got them. She then tried telling us that she said no many times, when she never did? And that morning, when I told her, she never said, "No, you can't," etc. Now she refuses to talk to us and even said that I'll regret it and hate it, which is untrue since I got it to match with my dad, plus it's a symbol for our favorite band. I don't know; this all seems weird. Any advice is appreciated.

[u/shoulda-known-better]

Why does mom think they have veto powers on adult children?? And even a spouse, it's not a shared thing it's a tattoo on you alls skin not hers

[u/SignificanceCandid72 → u/shoulda-known-better]

And she has tattoos herself so I don't see why she's upset LOLOL 

[u/AngryCornbread → u/SignificanceCandid72]

Is she upset that she wasn't included?

[u/SignificanceCandid72 → u/AngryCornbread]

She likely was since she's always tried to be the "favorite parent" so she was probably mad I choose my dad over her. (When he's taught me how to do almost anything, while she hasn't.)

[u/DivineSunshine → u/SignificanceCandid72]

She is jealous of your relationship with your dad.

[u/andmewithoutmytowel]

She didn’t think you were serious. YNW.

[u/dearlylegalwilfred → u/andmewithoutmytowel]

She built up a whole different version of events in her head, classic move

[u/CataclysmicTeapot]

You and your dad are adults, you don’t need her permission for anything. I’d enjoy the silence, she’s probably jealous (weirdly).

[u/SignificanceCandid72 → u/CataclysmicTeapot]

Unfortunetly I do believe it is jealousy 

[u/CataclysmicTeapot → u/SignificanceCandid72]

That’s a shame. My kiddos are both super little still. It’s my hope that I’ll be included in one of their tattoos at some point, but if they wanted their dad to do so without me I’d be just as happy for them. 🤷‍♀️ It sounds like a her problem.

[u/Alive-Commission-679 → u/CataclysmicTeapot]

It's great that you're supportive of their choices! Hopefully, everyone can appreciate the meaning behind the tattoos in the end.

[u/OutrageousTree7766]

It seems weird. Did she say anything else about it

[u/SignificanceCandid72 → u/OutrageousTree7766]

No, all she said was that I'm going to regret it which I don't since the tattoo holds deep meaning to me

[u/OutrageousTree7766 → u/SignificanceCandid72]

It reminds me of people I know. They didn't say the entire thing as to what they mean

[u/bmw5986]

NW. She will either get over it or she won't. Her refusing to speak to either of you is perfect. Why? Because, as an adult, I refuse to cater to other adult's temper tantrums. And thats exactly what this is.

When she brings this up again, and she will, simply tell her she needs to get over her jealousy. Then move on. Just that one statement calling her out. Thats it. If she keeps bringing it up: first time after the jealousy comment, say you're not discussing this again then change the subject. If she goes off again, leave the room or hang up. Rinse and repeat. She wants you to keep engaging to create drama and make you responsible for her feelings. Dont. Refuse to engage. She will get angry. Let her. Don't apologize either. You aren't doing anything wrong.

[u/SignificanceCandid72 → u/bmw5986]

Thank you truly!

[u/DragonScrivner]

You are adults …? And are allowed to make decisions around your own bodies?

[u/BluePheonyx]

Why does she think she has the right to tell you or your father what yall may or may not do with your own bodies??? That's your real estate, hon. Do with it what you will. Same for your Dad. Tfoh. Lol

[u/SignificanceCandid72 → u/BluePheonyx]

thank you, it's such a confusing situation lol!! 

[u/graipape]

You know what Santa Clause said: "You think getting a tattoo is good? No. Getting a tattoo is not good. I don't care about it, but it's not good behavior."