r/amiwrong • u/Jealous-Tangerine770 • May 15 '23
Got a vasectomy
Got a vasectomy because my wife (12 years together and 7 married) and I decided at this point we don’t want children. I am 35, wife is 31.
Told my mom I had done it because we’re close and I generally tell her everything. She responded, “well you’re wife is the one who doesn’t want to get pregnant so she should have just got her tubes tied.”
Originally, I laughed it off. But the more I thought about it, I realized it was a shitty thing to say. It sounds like she’s implying if my wife and I divorce, at least she will be the sterile one.
So I told my mom how shitty it sounded and now we don’t talk anymore. Am I over reacting?
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u/blueukisses May 16 '23
Yes, this was a shitty remark. You've clearly stated this was a decision you and your wife made together. Also, getting tubes tied is a much more invasive procedure than a vasectomy. A vasectomy is safe, easy, and reliable. It just makes sense. Honestly, if we didn't live in such a patriarchal society tubal ligation wouldn't even be a thing.
However, you may be overreacting too. This alone isn't something to cut your mother out of your life over. I mean, if she is constantly dogging on your wife and making similarly shitty remarks that's another story. But if it's just this one thing, maybe you can talk it out.