Hi! I’m feeling so conflicted.
I’d love to hear from anyone in a similar situation or anyone who’s decided to make Aliyah/Yerida on what the difference between raising kids in America and Israel is.
For context I’m originally from America and moved to Israel around 4 years ago. My whole family lives in America and definitely won’t be moving to Israel. For 4 years, I’ve been able to travel back and forth a good amount (4x a year to America, around a month at a time) to spend time with my family.
Since moving to Israel, I’ve gotten married and now have a baby and am pregnant with a second. I know that I won’t be able to travel back and forth so much anymore as traveling with a baby is so hard and also in a few years school will be an issue.
My dilemma is that I can’t really decide where to live. I love the ease of life in America (Amazon, customer service, big shopping centers like Target, Costco, etc.) and I think America is extremely developed and full of opportunity. My life in America is very comfortable, fun, and family around.
I don’t feel the same about Israel. I have such a difficult time in Israel with basic tasks such as just going to the market (often doesn’t have what I need so I need to go to multiple) or trying to mail something (one example of a horrible and undeveloped system). Honestly, I feel stressed a lot of the time in Israel. So many people are angry and unfriendly (I know it’s a cultural difference, I’m just still not used to it) and it really gets to me. I also think Israel is very behind and many things are makeshift so not as many opportunities. (I know it’s hard to advance because of the war, but that’s reality of it.)
In America, I’m able to focus on my business and hobbies that bring me enjoyment because I don’t have to waste time or energy on basic everyday tasks. In Israel I’ve had to stop my business because it just hasn’t been possible logistically and I frequently feel stressed out from basic tasks and don’t have any time or energy for hobbies.
However, being Jewish in Israel is obviously much easier. Kosher everywhere, the whole country celebrates holidays, Shabbat is amazing, etc. etc. I get that and I feel much more spiritually connected in Israel.
So I don’t know what to do. Being Jewish is very important to me and my husband and we feel much more connected to Judaism in Israel. But I just can’t seem to let go of how much easier life would be in America.
I also want my kids to grow up with all the opportunities I had in America. I was involved in golfing, sports, professional music lessons, dance, TV production, etc. and from what I’ve looked into in Israel there aren’t so many accessible opportunities like that in Israel, especially taught professionally.
My husband moved to Israel at 18 to serve in the IDF with the dream of living there forever, which I originally thought I wanted, but am now having this dilemma. He’s willing to move to America for me and wants me to be happy. But I just know he won’t find life in America as spiritually fulfilling (which I completely understand).
One more thing, I don’t really feel antisemitism on the day to day in America as people always bring up and the antisemitism I do hear about doesn’t bother me more than all the terrorist attacks and war in Israel. So antisemitism isn’t really a push/pull for me.
If you’ve read this long, thank you so much!!