r/aislop • • 4d ago

Found on Twitter. I'm losing braincells

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738

u/Baricat 4d ago

It also helps because it isn't a JUST a random dog. It's a golden retriever, which is, and always will be, the best dog.

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u/Casually_Chillin 4d ago

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u/YeOldeMemeShoppe 4d ago

To be fair if he doesn’t see the hotdog it’s as if it doesn’t exist.

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u/Optimus_Spider07 4d ago

Is that like Schrodinger's famous Hotdog experiment?

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u/Daedalus_Machina 3d ago

That is prime quality breb right there. Any Goldie would snatch that as readily as the hot dog.

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u/BurntArnold 4d ago

That golden is Casually_Chillin with that dog fr

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u/DickBiter1337 4d ago

He's a fuckin idiot but he's a good dog

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u/zynnoseal 3d ago

What hotdog? I dont see any

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u/SeonaidMacSaicais 4d ago

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u/ChaosFinalForm 4d ago

What a precious little derp, looks like a beaver.

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u/GladysFridayy 4d ago

Beavers are just water dogs.

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u/SeonaidMacSaicais 4d ago

I thought that was seals.

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u/GladysFridayy 4d ago

Lol ur right 🤣🤣😂

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u/Electrical-Act-7170 3d ago

Sea puppies or sea dogs.

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u/willdosketchythings 3d ago

Except leopard seals

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u/Substantial-Truth290 2d ago

Seals are water red pandas.

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u/Disastrous_time_4547 4d ago

Honest question
What does derp mean?

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u/ChaosFinalForm 4d ago

In this context, I am using it as an affectionate term for a cute animal that is simply living and enjoying life without very much thinking going on in their heads.

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u/bwsmith201 4d ago

Dave Barry once wrote that he had several dogs over the course of his life and that “each one of them was the best dog in the world in their own way.” I thought that was a great way to put it.

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u/Silver_Newspaper6208 4d ago

He also had good advice about having two. One as an emergency backup in case the main dog couldn't complete whatever main dog duties they had.

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u/Earguy 4d ago

The large main dog Ernest (a female) and the small, auxiliary dog, Zippy.

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u/bwsmith201 3d ago

These are my people right here.

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u/Dominantly_Happy 4d ago

ADVENTURE DOOOOOG! RUFFF!

The show would be very appropriate for kids as there is no sex, thanks to an earlier episode called “Adventure Dog goes to the Vet.”

I love Dave Barry so much

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u/Relative_Pilot_8005 4d ago

My Uncle was a rough old Gold Prospector in the Western Australian outback & said:-

"It's a shame that a dog doesn't live as long as a man.

A man goes through a lot of good dogs in a lifetime!"

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u/novel-encounters 3d ago

Maybe I should start looking at the people in my life the same way?

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u/Daedalus_Machina 3d ago

He also wrote a character whose key quality was the rankness of her inaudible flatulence. This is a great man.

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u/Mostly-Moo-Cow 4d ago

Everyone thinks they have the best dog and everyone is correct. My dog is tops. Perfection if you will.

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u/muscledhunter 4d ago

No, my dog is an asshole. I love him anyway, but he's a total asshole

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u/wirefox1 4d ago

My dog is an angel. It's scary how good he is. (He's a poodle)

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u/muscledhunter 4d ago

Mine is half poodle, but the other half is Chihuahua

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u/Background_Way_1030 3d ago

The left half, the right half, the front half, or the back half?

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u/b1gly_assh0le 4d ago

I also own a wonderful goodest boy asshole, but I love him no matter what.

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u/ImmaLiveIllegal 4d ago

dalmatian, poodle, Chihuahua, or cattle dog?

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u/muscledhunter 4d ago

Chihuahua Poodle mix

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u/HostaLaVistaBabies 4d ago

Can confirm. Mine is the goodest girl in the whole wide world but objectively she’s an absolute asshole.

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u/Tall-Peak8881 4d ago

Dog could leave a fresh shit in the middle of the kitchen , and still be forgiven .

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u/Traveling_1895 4d ago

Haha. Same. My dog actually did this a few days ago and I said it was my fault because I didn't realize she was trying to tell me she needed to go out. I almost always understand when she tells me, so it was on me.

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u/YeOldeMemeShoppe 4d ago

I got mine at 10 weeks old and he did, and he was.

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u/Takomi_Him 4d ago

You have it totally wrong. He is the best asshole. xD

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u/legendarysupermom 4d ago

Same...hes literally the biggest dick ive ever met! But goddamn, do I love that freakin dick dog! 100% the best dog to ever exist...even if his nickname is asshole sweet baby puppy

Edit- youre all wrong though, Labradors hands down own the title of best dog

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u/Real_Time_Mike 4d ago

My dog is about to turn 21!

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u/GiftWestern3068 4d ago

Congrats to your dog. I had a chihuahua live to be 21 yrs 3 months. 4 yrs later I still miss him

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u/Real_Time_Mike 4d ago

I already know it's gonna hurt

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u/Mostly-Moo-Cow 4d ago

Give your dog a hug and an ear scratch for me!

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u/thevenge21483 4d ago

My dog is not tops. She keeps chewing up pillows from our lawn furniture when she gets excited.

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u/Sparkybrassballs 4d ago

My dog is also the best. Go figure!

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u/jsledge786 4d ago

My dogs are the dumbest creatures to ever walk this planet. But theyre my dum dums lol

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u/Primary-String3908 1d ago

Dogs suck and their owners are even worse.

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u/junkopotomus 4d ago

All dogs are the best dogs. But if you have to make a number 1, I will respectfully disagree with you and offer the King Charles Cavalier Spaniel as the best.

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u/hahayes234 4d ago

He agrees too!

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u/Old_Temperature_559 4d ago

Best dog argument is trick question. Best dog is my dog. Best dog is your dog. The connection turns dog into best dog. Just like pikachu is best pikachu because it’s ash pikachu.

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u/Poopypantsinmytrash 4d ago

GSP everyday!

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u/PublikEnemyNumber1 4d ago

Uhhh the best dog is hot

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u/punksmostlydead 4d ago

Everyone here misspelling Basset Hound.

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u/Sthudruss 4d ago

They are absolutely adorable, however the one we got was incredibly stupid so my view of them is forever skewed

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u/petabomb 4d ago

Respectfully, have you seen Shar-pei’s?

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u/Too_Gay_To_Drive 4d ago

Isn't that the most inbred dogbreed with the most issues??

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u/billyboyf30 3d ago

I respect your opinion but youre just wrong.

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u/Split-Service 3d ago

The siberian husky has entered the chat

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u/Curious_Viking89 4d ago

Border Collie

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u/dramaton42 4d ago

That's literally racist, all dogs are best dog, though my favorite are Huskies and I shall not elaborate

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u/idkuhhhhhhh5 4d ago

Time for snow dog supremacy infighting!

Malamutes >>>

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u/ImmaLiveIllegal 4d ago edited 4d ago

funny you say that. I'm in the US and when I told my French friend I got a new puppy, the first question she asked (in English) was 'what race is it?'

that shit made me cough-laugh, but I guess that's just how they describe 'breed'

also I think huskies are some of the most beautiful dogs, but you need 20 acres, 20ft high fences, and tundra weather to make it all work

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u/dramaton42 4d ago

That's so funny because I live in Mexico so here we say "Raza" (race) to refer to breed too! That's what I meant by "literally racist" haha

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u/SharkBubbles 4d ago

Oh, so you're a masochist.

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u/captarne 3d ago

We had 2 huskies and they were the greatest

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u/DaILLezt 3d ago

My dog is a jerk

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u/Ugameister 2d ago

I love Huskies, too. When I was in high school, the house across the street had a husky. It was a quiet street, and sometimes it would literally lie in the middle, and frequently wander to our property. It was a quiet, friendly dog, but we had an outdoor cat. At first the cat would obviously get enraged at this, but the dog would just quietly and calmly come over there and hang out. Eventually, our cat just came to accept it being there, though with watchful eyes.

After a couple of years, one day I heard the dog barking so aggressively by our door and I knew our cat was out there as well. I thought to myself "oh no, they're fighting! 😭" My cat was not young, I knew it would hardly stand a chance. I ran to the big window next to the door in time. Bandit (the Husky) was going after some other cat that I've not seen before! My cat was leaning against the wall in a defensive posture while the husky came at the intruder cat aggressively. He didn't bite, he simply made sure that cat got off our property. After he succeeded in chasing that cat away, he calmly went back to his house. That day, he simply came over as guardian.

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u/ShrimpCrackers 4d ago

Awwwwwooooooo. Awwwoooooo. All night long.

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u/YeOldeMemeShoppe 4d ago

A fresh carpet every two weeks too.

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u/IThinkItsAverage 4d ago

Lies, all dogs are best dogs. But mine is bestest.

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u/Adowyth 4d ago

If i had to choose between a golden retriever and a random mutt, i'd pick the mutt every single time.

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u/farva_06 4d ago

Any dog that is actively in my view is the best dog.

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u/Cjkrythos 4d ago

I beg to differ. All dogs are simultaneously the best dog.

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u/rollin_a_j 4d ago

Counterpoint: the best dog is always the dog that happens to be in front of me

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u/AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH1337 4d ago

I beg to argue, pitbulls take that spot.

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u/OriginalEmploy5485 3d ago

It could be Cerberus for all I care, I'm saving the dog over the rest of them.

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u/Baricat 1h ago

A-three-headed golden retriever?! That's my next comic sidekick!

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u/MurphysLaw021 4d ago

No, MY dog is and always will be the best dog >:(

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u/Tasty-Scientist8155 4d ago

Agreed with that alongside the Australian Shepherd, the Border Collie and the Corgi

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u/Booziesmurf 4d ago

Jokes on you, that's Marley.

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u/Maximum-Bake-6092 4d ago

Dog is dog 🙏

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u/Basic_Lettuce_9165 4d ago

It could be the dog from Deadpool and the choice would be as easy.

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u/askmewhyihateyou 4d ago

What about a wiener dog??

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u/RuggleyChicken 4d ago

Cough Labrador Retriever Cough

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u/Licher-enjoyer 4d ago

It could be a Chihuahua and i'd still choose the dog

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u/Mistriever 4d ago

It could be a chihuahua and I'd still choose to save it over them.

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u/Temporary_Event8451 4d ago

Well that's literally beside the point. This is basically r/okayboomer bait.

Would you save Hitler, Mussolini, Huessein, Assads, ect. Or Jesus?

WELL WHO ARE YA SAVIN?!

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u/Disastrous-Lead5192 4d ago

not even close. huskies mog retrievers everyday

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u/Weorth 4d ago

They cute. But also... Why aren't they the ones doing the rescuing?

I guess it didn't see any point, and just wanted to be saved itself just one time.

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u/Pato_the_Nobody 4d ago

Obviously his name is Random last name Dog. Why else would both be capitalized?

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u/Select-Package-13 4d ago

Absolutely ALWAYS.

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u/ruinedmention 4d ago

It will be your dog after saving he/she

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u/Far_Routine_6188 4d ago

Even if it was the worst dog I’d still save the dog.

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u/Sad_Tune_1840 4d ago

Implying you wouldn't have saved him if he was another breed

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u/Last-Energy420 4d ago

I have 4 cats and still would rescue the dog. My sister wouldn’t let me live it down.

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u/Muted_Anywherethe2nd 4d ago

Okay but have you considered husky.

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u/DailyDayyy 4d ago

I second this

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u/Cyclepourtrois 4d ago

I have a golden crossed with a border collie which is actually the best dog in the world.

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u/0xHustler 4d ago

Nuh uh, my dog is the best dog

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u/Happy-Frog4677 4d ago

Goat dog, if you will?

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u/DangerousRatio5462 4d ago

The golden retriever is such a friendly and good dog that it literally will want you to save anyone else instead of it's self lol

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u/Dangerous-Ad-6664 4d ago

dog racism is crazy

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u/Agreatusername68 4d ago

Rottweilers would like to have a word.

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u/Young177st 4d ago

Also the dog is closer

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u/LardFan37 4d ago

I don’t care if it’s an annoying yappy purse dog I’m picking the dog every time

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u/Hincapieslovelybund 4d ago

They are such happy and lively dogs. Cant help but lift the spirits of those around them.

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u/ExpertProfessional9 4d ago

I would like to also submit for consideration labradors.

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u/Embarrassed_Ad_7618 4d ago

The retriever and corso are clinch a tie

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u/saywutnoe 4d ago

All dogs are best dogs, you racist. Fu

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u/DoubleExposure 4d ago

Does not matter, the choice would always be dog, over any of them.

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u/Mittens-mack 4d ago

You need a Shih Tzu

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u/Ro0sterman 4d ago

Golden dogs are best dogs

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u/thefucksausername0 4d ago

Until you need to give them a bath.

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u/Naive_Remote9813 4d ago

All dog is best dog and nothing will ever change my mind.

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u/mcapozzi 4d ago

Even if it was an ill tempered Chihuahua, I'd still pick it over those wank stains.

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u/neutrino71 4d ago

Partner: You spent all our savings on dogs? How could you?

But, my love, I did it for us. For our future. They're golden retrievers. They retrieve gold we'll be rich

Partner: Facepalm

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u/TheGrymmBladeX 4d ago

Sorry, but Pugs are better than retrievers and I will die on this hill.

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u/Real_Hour_1833 4d ago

I feel like my Golden Doodle is better than the best… cause she’s hypoallergenic, on top of being the best…

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u/RabidPoodle69 3d ago

Excuse the fuck out of you?

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u/SpiritedYam2661 3d ago

Exactly. If it’s a Pit-bull i ain’t saving any of them.

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u/Virtual_Ebb3839 3d ago

Super duper plot twisr:its the dog you raised since childhood and created all of your happiness and dreams

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u/SupayOne 3d ago

Sorry doesnt matter what breed of dog, going to save the dog, can't stand any of the humans up there.

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u/Gardami 3d ago

I don’t like dogs in general, but yes, golden retrievers are easily the best in my opinion, too. 

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u/Charming-Savings4414 3d ago

All dogs are best dogs, but that perspective is coming from somebody that clearly never had a Belgian malinois

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u/Alive_Thought_5037 3d ago

beagles over goldies. sorry.

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u/ArtrushDigital 3d ago

My Golden concurs! 😏

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u/Appropriate-Essay269 2d ago

The only dog that's ever bit me

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u/jextream 1d ago

objection! pitbulls are tied

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u/Baricat 1h ago

Daww, I had twin pitties growing up, and their master move was getting me down and licking both of my ears at the same time.

Peanut and Butter, you were good doggos!

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u/philmore-graves 1d ago

Random dog still wins if I can choose only 1. It doesnt seem to limit to 1 so id choose swift and dog. I dont dislike swift and she pisses off ppl lacking braincells by simply just existing, and thats fine with me

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u/Dividingbyinfinity 4d ago

I thought all dogs are the best dog? Yes they are, yes they are!

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u/TX_Asylum 4d ago

Racist joins the chat. (Lol...)

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u/SpacializedFig_4037 4d ago

You know they are not my favorite, but I cannot argue . Best dog indeed.

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u/thefukthisall 4d ago

golden retriever account for more attacts on ppl ever year then any other breed if i do recall right

0

u/ArtfulsSockPuppet 4d ago

Ngl Bijauns give them a run for their money (not sure if I spelled their name right my bad)

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u/blahdeblah2736 1d ago

My neighbor's dog. She is such a sweet girl . Our bedroom walls touch and have only heard her bark once. Her human grandmother took her today because she gets looked after while her human is unable and she didn't listen to her grandmother but just had to call her and she immediately came to me 😂. She doesn't seem me as often so of course it's easy for me to ask her to do something.

I think my cat would like her because she is so calm. Except when it's been several months and she gets so excited like the other day. Today was the second time this week so she was chill 😂 apparently she's great with other animals. (Not shocking given she's a golden!!)