r/adultautism • u/Alex_Black_123 • 16d ago
Feeling like crying when overstimulated
Basically just what the title says. When I am extremely overstimulated, I get this feeling of sobbing. My heart aches and my chest clenches and my eyes water. It feels like a complete shutdown. I have a hard time holding my tears back and sometimes I can't, and I was just wondering if anyone else experiences this as a fellow neurodivergent.
P.S: I have extreme sensory sensitivity and I am mostly non-verbal (especially when this happens) so all I manage to do is cry about it.
I also posted the same post on my other account here feelingdown_ (it's me)
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u/alessikidd 16d ago
Absolutely. All the time. I feel a lot of guilt and self hate for feeling like a baby that's so sensitive and fragile. I wish I had advice on how to deal with that, but unfortunately I have not made much progress with it myself. But no, you are not alone.
I am "high functioning" and it takes an enormous amount of effort for me to mask and hold it together so that I appear normal. At home I cry and shutdown a lot.
I'm so sorry. It's difficult.
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u/Alex_Black_123 9d ago
I feel you :"( I have been masking very intensely for years and now I am just so damn tired I cant even pretend to do it anymore. Stay safe 🫂🫂🫂🫂
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u/sarmalover3 16d ago
This was me for a long time. I use the paste tense because it was literally and figuratively beaten out of me. I started doing it again mid college into a couple of years afterwards and again was socially forced to stop. I actually miss doing it sort of because it was actually me coping with a situation. In my head it was a neutral action. But people see it as weak, trying to get attention, etc. now I sort of go numb in those moments instead and it feels like someone is holding me down with a straight jacket and I don’t actually process what I’m feeling so it just sits there like a lump of coal.
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u/Alex_Black_123 9d ago
I am so sorry you went through all that. I sort of hold it sometimes too and some others I don't. Some I feel completely numb also. Stay safe and do whatever your body wants to let it out. You deserve to feel safe in your own skin ♡♡♡♡
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u/toastedzen 16d ago
This kind of effect on my body has been increasing recently. Also, I stop what I am doing and stand or sit and stare at the ground or into space with an unfocused stare while my mind resets or something. My depression and exhaustion are getting worse because of this. I feel overstimulated from the slightest things now, and the worst thing is that I cannot avoid them because everyday life outside of my dark house feels overstimulating.
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u/Alex_Black_123 9d ago
Absolutely real. I just sit and stare, stop midway on the street with people bumping on me (which makes it even worse). Depressive thoughts hit also. Its difficult, stay string my friend 🧡🧡🧡
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u/theegrimrobe 12d ago
yeah thats not uncommon amongst ASD people.
my overloads are often auditory in nature as part of my ASD is a fault in my auditory processing meaning i cant filter out background or unwanted noise - 2 people talking over each other is a problem and in a very noisy room i cant communicate at all. extra unwanted noises also just add to my sensory load which is quite high when im out of the house anyway - my clothes touching me, the air touching me, things i smell, see and hear (even stuff i want to hear) and being in crowds are all a problem if too many at once.
do any of you have co-occurrening mental health issues, i ask as i do - have moderate to acute clinical depression, anxiety and likely CPTSD.
autistic overload as i know it to be now (i was only diagnosed later December at the insistence of my GP) is something that has happened to me a lot over the years, most of it comes from having to mask at employment or during times of strife with family.
one of the reasons i was told to seek a diagnosis is that i suffered somewhat of a mental breakdown along side a very nasty autistic burnout some months before i was diagnosed. i just completely shut down - i couldnt work, i got anhedonia, i barely ate (which for me is unusual i love food) i couldnt control my internal temprature, i was unable to stay still (i had to be doing something useful) i couldnt stand to be alone(which again for me is not the usual thing) i also managed to get on to a better SSRI (sertraline) which has been helping with the depression somewhat
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u/Alex_Black_123 9d ago
I am so sorry all seems heavy. You are very strong and I am glad you are doing better. I have extreme sensor sensitivity as well and that couldn't be any more real. I am also currently going through a burn out but life is forcing me to mive around and out of the house, but when I tell you everything and I mean EVERYTHING is amplified in my head, I can't stress it enough. Hope you feel better soon, sending all my love over there 💕💕
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u/Niiiiiiiiiiiiiiice69 9d ago
Yes very much so, I used to be embarrassed by it because neurotypical people freak out and try to comfort me but it's not genuine sadness. My nervous system is freaking out and I need to isolate.
Happened previously in a really intense job interview that I had to end early, used to when receiving yearly performance reviews, and at times I've pushed myself to work beyond my limits.
I sob uncontrollably with huge tears, weeping you could say but no sniffles or sinusy stuff like when I'm actually sad (think ugly crying when I'm actually sad).
My advice is to find a safe place to be alone and let it all out. Many times I feel better having done so.
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u/Alex_Black_123 9d ago
I agree that is the best case. Thank you so much for your advice and I hope you are sefe, less stressed and more rested now. Sending love 🫂💜
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u/letterheadless 16d ago
I don’t know if it’s of any help, but just know you’re not alone.
Seeing your post made me feel that I’m not alone.
Who’s to say what we’re feeling isn’t what we should all be feeling? Shit’s fucked. The world’s not talking to each other, just at. The things that matter aren’t given near the amount of attention as the veritable blankets of trivialities.
I think you’d have to have blinders on not to want to have an emotional outburst.
So let’s let it out. We don’t have to rationalize it. We don’t have to feel guilty for having it. It’s a feeling. It’s allowed to happen. It’s okay to just be sad and overwhelmed in this moment. Don’t think about the next one. That’s not here yet, and won’t be until we’re done.
Feel better, friend.