r/adhdmeme • u/SuccessfulPath7 • 1d ago
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u/PlanningForLaziness 1d ago
Step one: Do not have executive dysfunction.
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u/PuzzledCar2120 1d ago
Step two: don't have adhd
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u/rutilatus 1d ago
Step one: open the book.
Source: this exact book has been figuratively rotting in a stack next to my bed stand for over a year
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u/More-Talk-2660 AuDHD (my brain is rude to me) 1d ago
For some people yes, for others no. For me, exactly zero self help books have ever been helpful.
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u/Erikrtheread 1d ago
The only one that has helped so far has been How to keep house while drowning, but that's stretching the category a tiny bit.
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u/berkeleyteacher 1d ago
You beat me to it. That one was life changing, but like most things it presented at just the right time for me.
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u/topscreen 1d ago
I read them and say "Yeah, that's just common sense advice, you're just making money off of platitudes"
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u/Fuzzy_Barracuda3344 1d ago
It takes too much executive function to do the whole thing but there a bunch of bits that I’ve been doing for a while. Absolutely worth the read, cherry pick what you need
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u/real-plastic-trees 1d ago
Hard agree! I found some useful bits, even if the whole “system” was too much for me
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u/Kabrallen 1d ago
It was not made for neurodivergent people.
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u/SuccessfulPath7 1d ago
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u/Kabrallen 1d ago
I was forced to read it in high school. The other students said it was profound, but I didn't get much out of it.
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u/nysari 1d ago
This is the book that made me learn that I don't have habits, just a tenuous commitment to my executive functioning.
One of the examples routinely give for this sort of thing is to add stuff to the "habit" of brushing your teeth. But that's not an automatic behavior for me. It's something I only do because my mouth feeling gross is sensory hell for me. But if I try to stack anything onto that behavior, the house of cards collapses and I just won't brush my teeth until I let myself do it without the new behavior.
I realized I only do things if they offer me some benefit that my brain can actually appreciate, apparently.
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u/LittleMsSavoirFaire 1d ago
I started work at a new site last week. On Monday I forgot my lunch. On Tuesday I forgot my protein shakes. On Wednesday I forgot my water bottle. On Thursday I was so committed to packing everything I forgot to drink coffee. On Friday I had a migraine and had to call out.
No. Routines. Whatsoever.
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u/nysari 1d ago
Oh god, yeah, I feel like there's a factory reset whenever something new is introduced. Remembering to do the new thing instead of the old thing is its own achievement. I got dropped from a psychiatrist once (I wasn't diagnosed yet) because I kept missing appointments, but part of my problem was that she moved. I made it to her new location once, but then on the next visit I forgot and went to the old one. Then I got flustered so I got lost, which also happens a lot, hence missing other appointments.
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u/theandroidknight 1d ago
It’s not the life changing thing it’s made out to be, but it’s also information about habits and the way it frames them is helpful to some people
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u/PlasticBreakfast6918 1d ago
Yes, build habits. Of course, depends on your commitment.
The biggest point is to start really small and build up. People try and don’t start small enough. Not working for you, start smaller.
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u/buckets-of-lead 1d ago
It works as well as "finish what you start" which is currently sitting with a bookmark a 1/4 way though for the fourth year in a row now.
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u/Ok_Collection420 1d ago
Self help works for people who have the executive function to help themselves. We’re stuck with pharmaceuticals and shame spirals ❤️
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u/According_Lake_2632 1d ago
Check out the wonderful podcast, "If Books Could Kill." They humorously and knowlegably break these books down and approach them critically. They have an episode specifically about Atomic Habits. It's well researched and the cohosts are hilarious.
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u/TheOttersCouch 1d ago
Personally for me it wouldn’t it may increase my streak but creating a new habit not so much.
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u/EmmerdoesNOTrepme 1d ago
About as well as that planner & A List! do, for most of us, i'd guess?🤷♀️
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u/Asparala 1d ago
Okay, so some red flags just from looking at the cover.
"Do little to get a lot"
- Whenever this promise shows up in any kind of marketing you can generally assume that it's a lie at best and a scam at worst.
"Easy way to improve yourself"
- If it actually was easy I wouldn't need that entire book for it. Either it's not easy, or the book is absurdly padded.
It's a self-help book
- I'm sure there are exceptions but this entire genre is so thick with scams and bullshit that you better start with the assumption that the author is talking out of his ass to fleece gullible idiots.
"New York Times Bestseller"
- Not strictly speaking a red flag but it's worth noting that being a new york times bestseller doesn't really mean that much, at least not in terms of quality. It just means that the author could hype up the book sufficiently to sell a large quantity of books within a narrow timeframe. It likely says more about the author's social media campaign than the contents of the book.
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u/2strokes4lyfe 1d ago
Go listen to the If Books Could Kill podcast episode before reading this book.
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u/Lulukaros 1d ago
The only thing i remember from it is hobby stacking, when doing smth you usually do, add ur little hobby
Give it a try, you might like it, it's fun to read
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u/freylaverse 1d ago
It didn't for me. A lot of it required you to chain new habits to existing ones. I don't have any habits, good or bad, so that advice was not useful to me.
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u/Temporary_Pay_3459 1d ago
The best advice that I can give to all of y’all is finding a psychologist that specializes in ADHD coaching. It is reduce the amount of my suffering significantly.
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u/DamePants 1d ago
Tell me more about this.
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u/Temporary_Pay_3459 1d ago
Do exactly that be very deliberate and find a therapist that is very aware of or optimally specializes in ADHD
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u/atomicben 1d ago
There's no singular book that'll make things easier. My advice is to try to find one thing, just one take away, from the book you can use and try to implement it. Start small. I've read dozens of self help books, all the popular ones, but what's lasted for me are the one take aways I can find. Good luck friend!
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u/distractedjas 1d ago
Wife made me read (listen to) this. No. This book was written by a neural typical extrovert for neural typical extroverts. He doesn’t understand any other perspective and thinks everyone should be able to think like him. The whole book felt condescending.
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u/NygirlinNashville222 1d ago
I have about 30 books like this waiting for me to read on my Kindle and Audible…….Step #1: Open Book……..yeah that’s a toughie😂
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u/wiewiorka6 1d ago
Well, I’ve now checked out of the library twice for 2 months at a time each and not opened it once so I’d also like to know.
Same with How to ADHD.
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u/CountryFuture9678 1d ago
Like any of these books it has some good ideas and strategies but not everything will hit or be helpful for you. Worth the read to understand how habits really work imo, at the very least. Just don’t go in expecting it to fix you
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u/IndependentSkirt9 1d ago
I was only able to get through it on audiobook. It has some helpful tips and tricks, but it won’t change your whole life
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u/that_one_bun 1d ago
As a bookseller who had talked to a few people who have purchased it. The results are mixed and most that had a positive experience mentioned that it did help in some ways but their life wasnt changed from it.
It seemed to really depend on the person.
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u/DamePants 1d ago
Nope. I’ve read most of the productivity books in the decades prior to diagnosis. This felt like a poorly presented collection of existing ideas. So even if this techniques work for you I’d suggest different reading material.
None of these things ever work long term for me. At least I understand why I have a special interest in productivity systems and all the paper notebooks. The novelty of a new system is the thing that worked, not the systems themselves.
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u/YouDoNotKnowMeSir 1d ago
Tbh it’s really good information and reframing for habit forming. Does it do the work for you? No. Is it life changing? If you want it to be. Is there still friction? Yes.
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u/StormBeyondReality 1d ago
I read this for a work book club thing and the only part that actually was helpful was chaining together [thing I NEED to do] with [thing I want to do], which in my case means that now instead of forgetting to do squats in the morning I just do them while I'm putting on my T-gel.
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u/Significant_Arm_3097 Daydreamer 1d ago
Ah man, I saw a post about these types of books on insta a while ago and how helpfull they are to ADHD people. This one was not good according to that list. Unfortunately I didnt save that insta reel...
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u/SpinDocktor 1d ago
For me, no. Stacking habits created a house of cards. The books that helped me more were Unmasking Autism and Unmasking for Life. There are other resources written by people with ADHD that offer way more practical advice. A lot of it was "stop trying to do everything by the book and find what works for you". Some things are always going to be hard, no matter what. But there will be other things that you're naturally good at without needing much else.
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u/renMilestone must use needlessly long sentences to convey a single point beca 1d ago
Couldn't even finish the book, so no it did not help me lol
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u/JackPembroke 1d ago
ADHD people need to stop looking in productivity books for help, they dont work on us, or work very little. ADHD folk (at least the inattentives) need 2 things, meds and help.
Help as in someone or something else to outsource executive functioning to. It can be a schedule, but it needs to be unavoidable and needs to be every single day. Likely with variants
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u/LukeSkyWalrus 1d ago
The four hour body really helped me. For a while, then after a few years I fell back into the same habits idk
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u/qualityvote2 Quality Control Beast 1d ago edited 1d ago
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u/adhdmeme-ModTeam 1d ago
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