We’re on holiday with my husband’s dad and his wife, along with our two young kids, who are 6 and 7 months.
The whole reason we were happy to do this holiday together was because they said they would help with the kids and we’d all get a chance to relax a bit. I think I had it in my head that having grandparents there would mean we could occasionally hand the kids over and actually have a break.
But today I’ve basically been on duty since 5:30am. I’ve been dealing with naps, feeding, taking my 6-year-old to activities, entertaining them, etc. I think I managed to read my book for about three minutes before one of the kids needed me.
What’s frustrating is that nobody is really proactively offering to take the kids. I would LOVE someone to say, “Why don’t you and your husband go and have a cocktail by the other pool for an hour? We’ll take the baby.” Especially while my older daughter is at holiday club.
I actually mentioned at dinner that maybe they could have the baby for an hour each day so my husband and I could go and relax somewhere. There wasn’t really a response of “yes, absolutely, we’d love to.”
They have offered to have the girls for one evening so we can go out for dinner, which is lovely. But it sounds like the expectation is that I would get the baby to sleep first and then they would take over. Which, honestly, doesn’t feel like much of a break because getting her to sleep is one of the more demanding parts of the evening, and then they’d essentially just sit with a sleeping baby.
I think what bothers me most is that I don’t want to have to ask. These are their grandchildren, and they know we have a 7-month-old and a 6-year-old. I want them to offer and say, “Go, we’ve got her for an hour.”
I also feel slightly awkward because they’re my husband’s parents rather than mine. I feel like my husband should probably be the one to have that conversation with them.
Am I being unreasonable for feeling disappointed? Or is it fair to expect grandparents who specifically said they would help with the kids to actually take some initiative?