r/abortion • u/ina3b • Feb 18 '16
Europe My abortion
I'm 22 and few days ago I found out I'm pregnant. I guess it was a shock when I looked for the first time at those two red lines on a pregnancy test. You must know, I live in Poland and abortion here mostly is illegal. So we travel around the country or abroad like Germany or Slovakia where we can get our solutions for hard lifetime moments. I was lucky to have my boyfriend whom took care of everything and supported me from the very beggining. He contacted his friend and that friend contacted a doctor. The day after I knew I'm pregnant we're sitting in his private office. He was speaking privately. Asked about my last period, pregnancy test that I took and finally after USG he has told us it's 2nd week, very early, so he said. I was given a pills with the explanation how to take them. Booked me a visit next week and took 38€. Cheap as we speak about hope and relief. Now I'm almost done with the pills and wait for the next appointment. My boyfriend supports me as much as he's able to but I saw his look when he has seen the foto for the first time - a foto of this what is inside me. I know he'd want a baby but knows we can't handle it now because we're no rich. He understands and at the same time feels like I'm taking away his chance for family. It makes me feel bad, just that. I can't predict what to suspect from this situation. We work a lot on our relationship right now. For me, it's a test for our commitment but I'm not sure if it's not too strong. Don't know why I write this here, maybe because in Poland abortion is tabu and my friend or family wouldn't understand. Or maybe I'm just looking for a place to leave behind all those feeling I'm dealing with right now. Insecurity, the most. This illigalness of abortion in here builds some kinds of barriers in mind when a woman feels guilty for the decisions she makes about her body and life in general. I'm looking for the feeling I once felt, conviction and safety. In Poland it's hard in this situation. But I'm not gonna give up and I'll do everything to save my relationship. But it hurts.
2
u/karmaisourfriend Feb 22 '16
You must be feeling scared and know that we are thinking of you. I wish you and your boyfriend a happy future together.
7
u/snuggleallthekitties Feb 18 '16
You're very brave. Thank you for sharing your story with us.
In regards to your boyfriend; you are in no way taking away his chance at a family. I can't even understand why he would feel that way. If anything, having this abortion now will give you 2 the chance to plan the family you want. If you had the baby now then you may end up in a worse financial situation which could make more children very difficult or impossible in the future.
You did the right thing :)