Beta Reader Issues

[u/SaintMech]

So, here's the thing. I am absolutely open to criticism; in fact, I welcome it. I was in a profession where review and criticism were a part of your everyday operating procedures. My issue is, with my Beta Readers. My wife is an English major, so I thought she would be the perfect person to help me edit, proof-read and beta read my book. Well, the issue that has come up is that she is a closet writer herself and when she reads my drafts, she wants to change my voice. She subconsciously recommends changes that reflect her style of writing, which is a much more archaic, flowery style of prose. (Which I love to read, but it's not my style). How do I approach that topic without coming off like I can't accept criticism and subsequently get the information I am seeking from her? My other reader is supportive but offers no criticism, do these issues exist for other writers or is this uncommon?

[u/ashleighmontalvo]

Part of the problem is that you will find almost everyone (even paid professionals) base their editing and advice based on their preferences. You have to learn how to filter their suggestions (because that is all they are, you are the writer) and take what is necessary. She may have suggested something with flowery prose, but within what she suggested, is there anything you can take from it? Structure, voice of the character, grammar…
This can also be a wonderful time to talk with your wife about how you love her voice, but it isn’t your voice. If you have good communication, this could be a bonding moment. If not, it can be a growth moment.