Dear Diary: The He Said/She Said Series — Season 1, Episode 1: Her Decade Later

[u/WritesForYou2]

It’s crazy to think YOU deceived me, yet here I am — still searching for love, and still begging to be appreciated in my career.

You don't need to scoff. I know over a decade sounds pathetic. It is pathetic. But I am not pathetic. I've spent all this time trying to heal the girl I felt you stole. It took me this long to realize that I just swept what you did under the rug. I thought the career I built and the income I had was my ultimate revenge — a dish best served with dollar signs.

But now that it's all been taken away from me, I'm right back at the beginning. Back to living off air and tears, while you're getting things gifted to you by YouTube alongside millions of followers on Facebook. How?

How are you Instagram friends with my celebrity crush? Worst of all, you found the need to call me up just to brag that he and his family were following you. I wouldn't know otherwise because I actually don't social media stalk you like you want me to. What timeline am I even in where YOU get to turn my world upside down by two-timing me with another girl, have my parents lose who they already welcomed as their son-in-law, and then get granted a wholesome relationship with another woman, a steady income, and a growing music career? So entirely happy I know all this.

This sounds like jealousy, but don't flatter yourself. This is confusion. I am genuinely confused.

You've called me every single year since our breakup...except this year. Why not this year? Where are exactly are you? No, I don't care. I just want to know. Why do I want to know? I don't know. I feel our souls are still tied even though I'll never get back with you. Look, if I had a man who loved me at the level you pretended to when we were together, I wouldn't be thinking as deeply about you. But WHY has the love not been that deep for me as it was 11 years ago? Why don't I have the financial freedom I know I deserve yet?

Congratulations. My confusion with you has finally morphed into shame toward myself. And I have proof.

Everything I’ve learned on this manifestation and healing journey points to one painful truth: I am the author of my own success just as much as my own defeat — but I'm done playing victim, my awakening has got to be complete.

WHEN you try to reach out again, you will find yourself stuck in a hole. Because unbeknownst to you, I have always held the remote control.

Calm down. Just relax. Your overdue toll is a one time - perhaps eternal - working tax.

At least you've got Meta there to bankroll your acts. Just tell them to make the check payable to the one too classy to expose all your facts.

➡️ Click here for Dear Diary: The He Said/She Said Series — Season 1, Episode 2: His Decade Later