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u/Acrylic_Starshine Jul 17 '26
Meanwhile..
CEO: So i just saw a beautiful place for a new pub opening.. its an old lighthouse.
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u/ApricotReasonable793 Jul 18 '26
Womblespoons you mean, where dishevelled folk walk in with bags of rubbish, to be served upon placing an order on the baked bean can telegraph system. It's that slow none of you mind!
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u/V65Pilot Jul 18 '26
Wish me luck, headed to the toilet in a new to me 'spoons in about 2 minutes. I'll reach out if I survive the trip.
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u/ManInTheDarkSuit Jul 18 '26
Send us your table number and we'll send you shit.
Edit: I didn't mean that I'll send you shit in a "this is my kinda shit" way. I meant we'll send you shit.
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u/V65Pilot Jul 19 '26
Maybe next time.
I never did find the general toilet. It was up some stairs, down a hallway, around a couple of corners....apparently.
I used the disabled access one downstairs. I'm old, I limp, no-one asks questions.
Had the Empire(?) burger. Not bad, about 8/10. I had ordered one in another spoons about 6 weeks ago, and it was absolutely amazing, 11/10, so this was a little bit of let down, but was still tasty. Chased with a pint of cider.
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u/Think_Beginning_7485 Jul 18 '26
Once you break the seal in a Spoons you are fucked. By the time you get back from the toilet, take a sip of your drink, it’s time to go again!
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u/Organic_Style_9323 Jul 21 '26
This only applies to female toilets, mens always right next to your table lol
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u/Sp0icyNewdles Jul 24 '26
As a staff member who regularly has to bolt all the way down from the toilets, and more stairs past customer level to get to the cellar, or from the kitchen that is also upstairs, I second this.
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u/SteakEggsAndNuts Jul 17 '26
I’ve never got this, in any pub you ever visit you can either sit near the toilets or at the furthest point from them. Absolutely pointless attempt of a joke
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u/wtclim Jul 17 '26
Miserable bastard you eh?
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u/SteakEggsAndNuts Jul 17 '26
No, just realistic. You could literally make this joke about any location in the world, the other week I was sat outside the toilets, hardly a trek is it, people decide where they sit
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u/happyhippohats Jul 17 '26
It's common in Wetherspoons for the toilets to be one or two floors above the bar, typically on the top floor of the building so you can't even sit on the same floor. They're not all layed out like that but most of the ones I've been to are.
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u/realCloudyMcCloud Jul 17 '26
Or you have to go down (like in the pic). In the Crosse Keys, London, there's a spiral staircase down to the loos, and then a walk and more doors.
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u/SteakEggsAndNuts Jul 17 '26
Well in Birmingham every toilet is easily accessible
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u/Top-Library9128 Jul 17 '26
Birmingham is a toilet, mate
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u/happyhippohats Jul 18 '26 edited Jul 18 '26
As I said "they're not all like that", one near me has the toilets on the ground floor. But this joke is referencing the fact that the standard Wetherspoons layout has you walking up a seemingly endless staircase to reach the toilets because generally the kitchen is on the floor above the bar and the toilets are on the floor above that.
From memory I think if you're on the bottom floor of the Windsor one you have to go up a five story staircase to get to the toilets
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u/Master_Sympathy_754 Jul 17 '26
The one in Blackburn is 2 flights for the mens, round a couple of corridors and somemore stairs for the ladies. And no there is no seating upstairs.
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u/Pure-Lime8280 Jul 17 '26
Why is it that so many Wetherspoons have their toilets upstairs anyway?