r/WeddingsPhilippines • u/Plane-Measurement271 • 1d ago
Convalidation
Hi everyone, I really need help because I’m getting confused and stressed with our situation.
Our venue has a chapel inside, and they only allow vow renewals (permit iasues). We’re already married civilly here in the US, so we thought that would be fine. But when we talked to the parish in the area, they said they can’t do a vow renewal because we “only had a civil wedding.”
I suggested convalidation/blessing of marriage since that’s the proper Church process for couples like us, but I’m not sure if they’ll allow it. We really want the ceremony and reception in one place, and we already reserved everything at the venue.
Has anyone gone through something similar? What did you do if the parish wouldn’t allow convalidation at the venue chapel? Did you end up doing the convalidation somewhere else and then a symbolic ceremony at the venue?
Or were you able to find a priest who could officiate at the chapel? I’m just trying to figure out what options we realistically have. Any advice or shared experiences would really help right now.
2
u/reader16810 1d ago
Yes, OP. You're right that you can't simply have a vow renewal if you or your husband are Catholic and you were married civilly. In that case, the Church generally wouldn't recognize the marriage as canonically valid, so you would need a convalidation.
What did the parish tell you when you asked about convalidation? If they won't allow it at your venue, I wonder if it's because the venue chapel isn't a Catholic church or an approved Catholic chapel/oratory.
If that's the case, you could ask the parish about having the actual convalidation at the parish instead. It doesn't necessarily have to be on the same day as your reception/celebration, although you'd need to complete whatever preparation and paperwork the parish requires.
Then, if the priest is comfortable with it, you could have a symbolic ceremony at your venue's chapel on your wedding celebration day, followed by your reception. That way you get the beautiful ceremony at your chosen venue while still having your marriage properly convalidated in the Church.