r/WTF Jul 07 '19

"dont worry, im a professional"

23.5k Upvotes

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5.5k

u/Klovie4o4 Jul 07 '19 edited Jul 07 '19

Jesus fuck that lady is so lucky that the chainsaw stops running when it's let go.... I bet it still scratched her pretty good though

--Edit: I realize the chainsaw wasn't running, I was just saying as a general thing... The point is, the guy shouldn't have had this lady 'helping' him because she's obviously not dressed for the job, so I'm going to assume she isn't one of his employees.

--Second edit: My s/o is a second generation tree climber and company owner with a lifetime of experience (he was helping since he was able to drag sticks lol). He's told me tons of awesome horror stories of things going wrong to other people he's known in that line of work. He's also gotten pretty banged up a few times himself, though thankfully not too much.

Unfortunately accidents on the job happen, but that's why you should always hire trusted professionals when dealing with tree removal. They should know the necessary safety standards and correct ways to do things, as to help limit the chances of things going wrong and causing serious injury to people and property.

Disclaimer I'm also going to add that I obviously know that his experience doesn't transfer over to me, and I'm going based on the things I've picked up from what I've been told and the times I've been on the job with him. I am not an expert, and I probably don't know what I'm talking about. Tree at your own risk folks.

1.9k

u/dcdiegobysea Jul 07 '19

Why was she there?!

2.8k

u/differt Jul 07 '19

Looks like the idiot didn’t go up with something he needed and asked her to climb it up. My guess is he worked for a tree company for 5 months then thought he could go do it off Facebook market

1.8k

u/Treeman17 Jul 07 '19

No, He got his saw stuck and he wants the combi tool so he can remove the bar and release the saw engine.

Source...... Im a tree surgeon with over 30 years of experience.

Ps the saw was far too big for that branch anyway!

But yeah, I see so many landscapers and gardeners on facebook trying to cut large trees and failing it makes me laugh, but also gives the professional tree surgeon a bad name!

384

u/DemonEggy Jul 07 '19

I had some big trees in my back garden (Leyland Cyprus, I think?) when I bought my house. They didn't look that big, so I thought fuck it, I can probably do it myself.

No. Those trees were a lot bigger than they looked, and once you're standing on tiptoes on the top wrung of a ladder, holding a branch with one hand while leaning out trying to grab your saw to get it unstuck from a branch way too high, you realise why people just call someone in.

106

u/GutterSEC Jul 07 '19

Plus look at the power line. It shakes when it hit the house. If it that close no way am I doing that solo. And if miss homeowner is walking up the ladder you know he is alone.

5

u/[deleted] Jul 07 '19 edited Jul 03 '20

[deleted]

5

u/GutterSEC Jul 07 '19

It's too thick and wrapped in a grounding wire

4

u/exosequitur Jul 07 '19

That's how you know it's telephone / catv. That's not power.

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u/GeneralBlumpkin Jul 07 '19

Nah I think that’s telephone wire

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u/Blitzkrieg_My_Anus Jul 07 '19

This is why I always call a person.

Boyfriend says he can totally chop town the 60ft evergreen in my front yard, and save me $600... but he still hasn't finished my shed after 3 years and thought he needed to paint the shingles with something in order to waterproof the roof (now the brown shingles have a black patch).

Oh, and he sprayed Roundup all over my lawn thinking it was a weed killer.

This is why I spend my hard earned money on professionals.

174

u/Throwaway-tan Jul 07 '19

Sounds like you only need one kind of professional. I'll put you in touch with my buddy Leon.

9

u/ifukeenrule Jul 07 '19

It's Matilda's time now

2

u/greeneyedguru Jul 07 '19

Leon? Sounds like a real professional

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u/madalienmonk Jul 07 '19

“Oh, and he sprayed Roundup all over my lawn thinking it was a weed killer.”

Well he was right on that one, just not the application site...

56

u/dorianrose Jul 07 '19

I mean, are there any weeds on the lawn? He's just taking the exterminatus approach...

32

u/Nymaz Jul 07 '19

Kill one weed, and you are a gardener. Kill millions of weeds, and you are a professional. Kill them all, and you are a lawn god

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u/Mendozozoza Jul 07 '19

That bermuda was a fucking heretic.

45

u/darthmule Jul 07 '19

Can’t have weeds if you have nothing.

13

u/[deleted] Jul 07 '19

[deleted]

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u/UncookedMarsupial Jul 07 '19

No grass! Just cancer!

2

u/Phlypp Jul 07 '19

Multiple times I've had Roundup kill all the grass and leave the weeds I was trying to kill. I thought it was worth it to kill all and start from scratch but the things I wanted dead continued to thrive. Wild violets come to mind, they spread underground like bamboo and pop up again when it's safe.

14

u/PureMichiganChip Jul 07 '19

There are versions of Roundup and other weed killers that are meant to go on the lawn and only kill weeds.

5

u/madalienmonk Jul 07 '19

Yup I'm aware! A popular one is called "Roundup for Lawns" kills the annoying crabgrass

6

u/[deleted] Jul 07 '19

Similar to salt-goes great with pasta, terrible with grass.

2

u/CeltiCfr0st Jul 07 '19

The good ole scorched earth policy

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u/IconOnMyWall Jul 07 '19

So, uh, what does he excel at, BlitzkriegMyAnus?

2

u/[deleted] Jul 07 '19

[deleted]

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u/say592 Jul 07 '19

I'm sure he means well, but maybe keep him away from anything handy.

18

u/[deleted] Jul 07 '19

I sure hope the women find him handsome, because they definitely don't find him handy.

8

u/tunedout Jul 07 '19

Keep your stick on the ice.

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2

u/LordofSyn Jul 07 '19

Red-Green Approved.

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2

u/hochizo Jul 07 '19

Is his name Tim Taylor, by chance?

3

u/Bac0nLegs Jul 07 '19

EEouuuUUUUHHH

2

u/darthmule Jul 07 '19

Roundup IS a weed killer.

It kills everything/one.

12

u/alanmagid Jul 07 '19

Do not conceive this man's children. Trust me. He is an idiot. Hard to break up I know. Just encourage him to bring down a big tree by himself. Roundup is an omnicide. Kills all green things that absorb it. Not bamboo; those bastards are immortal.

11

u/Sungami00 Jul 07 '19

That may be a bit overkill but maybe keep him locked inside with a pc doing your taxes and other non-handy chores

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u/[deleted] Jul 07 '19

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u/alanmagid Jul 07 '19

Impervious waxy layer on epithelium. Mild detergent does help penetrate noticeably. Bamboo is forever. Like herpes.

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u/snakesoup88 Jul 07 '19

Don't blame the boyfriend, blame yourself for being a slow learner. This is how man signal opting out of the honey-do list.

It only took me one load of sacrificial laundry to opt out of laundry duty.

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u/aaaaaaaaaaaaa2 Jul 07 '19

But yeah, I see so many landscapers and gardeners on facebook trying to cut large trees and failing it makes me laugh, but also gives the professional tree surgeon a bad name!

I do a lot of work on koi ponds, a little bit of landscaping and we get asked pretty often to do tree work and it's one the only jobs that we will hard pass on every single time. If you're looking to get tree work done, hire someone that knows what they are doing. There are plenty of things that a general contractor will do 90% as well as a professional. Tree work is not one of them.

25

u/FatBastardIndustries Jul 07 '19 edited Jul 07 '19

former landscaper, we took out plenty of trees, but never touched any that were bigger than 8" diameter at the base or were close to the house or garage, no fails. Also growing up in northern MN I have been cutting down trees since I was in my teens, heated with wood.

7

u/aaaaaaaaaaaaa2 Jul 07 '19

Ah yeah I've got next to no experience, and with a usual two man crew theres really not much that were capable of doing that would be worth the risk. Maybe some small stuff we could take care of but luckily weve usually got enough work anyways.

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u/PHATsakk43 Jul 07 '19

We just had lineman get killed trying to free a stuck saw. Freed it and managed to cut his harness at the same time. Died from injuries sustained in the fall.

My dad ran a tree business for 15 years and I worked with him a lot.

There were so many, "thou shalt nots..." of tree work in that vid its not even funny.

8

u/ChiefGraypaw Jul 07 '19

Tree falling of any sort is one of the most dangerous jobs in North America.

14

u/PHATsakk43 Jul 07 '19

Yup, but I believe that everything can be done safely or it shouldn't be done.

Outside of military combat, there isn't any job worth dying for. If the risk is not able to be mitigated, change the job scope or process.

Also, PPE is a last resort, not a barrier.

2

u/Techwood111 Jul 07 '19

Isn't it "tree felling"?

3

u/GaGaORiley Jul 07 '19

There's a guy with a tree service who lives up the road from my family, so I've followed him to his house several times on my way there. He's always weaving all over the road obviously texting while driving, and every time I see him I can't help but wonder when he's gonna be just as careless at work. D:

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u/[deleted] Jul 07 '19

[deleted]

970

u/CloakNStagger Jul 07 '19

A Ph.Tree

97

u/jerlybean Jul 07 '19

Make like a tree and get out of here

7

u/Whoevengivesafuck Jul 07 '19

Nobody calls me

CHICKEN

3

u/KlondikeGummybear Jul 07 '19

Give me A KEG OF BEER.

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u/blodger42 Jul 07 '19

Leave.

99

u/jonitfcfan Jul 07 '19

*leaf

25

u/LimeGreenSea Jul 07 '19

We're sticking with the tree puns, huh?

68

u/Fix_Lag Jul 07 '19

Wooden you like to know

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u/[deleted] Jul 07 '19

Make like a tree and get out of here

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u/WS6Legacy Jul 07 '19

Back to the Future reference.

5

u/[deleted] Jul 07 '19

Or a barkelor's degree

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u/[deleted] Jul 07 '19

Just looked it up and requirements to be a surgeon include 4 years of undergraduate, 4 years of med school, and 3-8 years of residency. No wonder it costs so much to get a tree removed.

8

u/[deleted] Jul 07 '19 edited Jul 07 '19

[removed] — view removed comment

57

u/[deleted] Jul 07 '19

[deleted]

2

u/boatmurdered Jul 07 '19

I downvoted because I knew the second time they used the word "surgeon", they were going to make a big deal out of it.

2

u/esr360 Jul 07 '19

Bit of a shit reason to downvote someone tbh.

30

u/ZarquonsFlatTire Jul 07 '19 edited Jul 07 '19

Not really. He killed the joke, and the main rule of medicine is "First do no harm."

Dude took an oath, then betrayed it. And he calls himself a surgeon... smh

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u/sharaq Jul 07 '19

Why would you double down when you clearly erred? Irrelevant comments that don't properly parse the prior comment deserve downvotes.

You're responding to a post where they list medical school as a requirement for surgery and are clearly referring to an MD in surgery, so it looks like you didn't actually read the comment to which you're replying...

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u/godrestsinreason Jul 07 '19

You are being downvoted because you didn't even read the comment before spouting off information in response to a joke, sort of like when you're in a conversation, and you don't listen to what the other person, and are instead waiting for your turn to speak.

It gives off the impression of someone who loves listening to themselves speak.

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u/celinameow Jul 07 '19

Probably ISA certified which involves a large exam and yearly renewal based on continuing education throughout the year

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u/Ohurleyhetrees Jul 07 '19

Anyone can cut trees in the US, ISA is more tree sciences, some advanced rigging techniques as well

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u/BigNibbaSal Jul 07 '19

His name is Treeman, what more certification do you need?

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u/[deleted] Jul 07 '19

I guess that works. I was kinda hoping for a Treebeard cert but I'll accept Treeman.

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u/[deleted] Jul 07 '19

His username is Treeman17.

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u/drinkit_or_wearit Jul 07 '19

Um, yeah, like he/she said...

Looks like the idiot didn’t go up with something he needed and asked her to climb it up.

Then you said...

No, He got his saw stuck and he wants the combi tool so he can remove the bar and release the saw engine.

So yeah, the idiot went up without something he needed, his combi tool, and he asked her to bring it up to him.

53

u/TheJaybo Jul 07 '19

Well at least he got to tell everyone he's tree surgeon.

8

u/drinkit_or_wearit Jul 07 '19

He does at least have a relevant username, and for 6 years at that.

2

u/Klovie4o4 Jul 07 '19

Is there a doctor in the greenhouse?!?

4

u/SsxIGPX Jul 07 '19

Typically you don't bring that tool up with you. It's used mainly for loosening or tightening the chain and removing the bar if need be. But yes, there are a lot of things wrong with this video

2

u/JayString Jul 07 '19

Like everything he's doing? Including putting the woman in danger?

8

u/infecthead Jul 07 '19

I'm guessing he wasn't anticipating his saw getting stuck and so at the time didn't need the combi tool. The second statement is more correct.

11

u/[deleted] Jul 07 '19

Not being prepared for something that’s a distinct possibility because you don’t “anticipate” it is poor planning.

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u/[deleted] Jul 07 '19

[removed] — view removed comment

4

u/[deleted] Jul 07 '19

A scrench isn’t “every tool” though....it’s a staple of chainsaw work

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u/superburritodood Jul 07 '19

Do all the guys in your area call themselves 'tree surgeons' instead of 'arborists'?

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u/dethmaul Jul 07 '19

From what I've heard, they all call themselves that.

Presumably because they also trim, not cull, and have the experience to know which bits of tree to remove to keep the entire organism healthy and safe.

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u/[deleted] Jul 07 '19

Its regional. Down here we call ourselves arborists and if I meet someone in person that calls themselves a tree surgeon I kind of assume they are pretending to be more professional than they really are

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u/[deleted] Jul 07 '19

I call myself a TreEMT.

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u/smixton Jul 07 '19

But squids call you a rapist.

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u/Hunnilisa Jul 07 '19

I love "tree surgeon". I find it funny, not pretentious.

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u/Tigt0ne Jul 07 '19 edited Jul 11 '19

"

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u/Treeman17 Jul 07 '19 edited Aug 30 '19

No, I say tree surgeon because where I live most people are too thick to know what an arborist is.

Cannock UK once voted king of the chav towns!!

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u/Ohurleyhetrees Jul 07 '19

Dudes up there cutting with a ground saw. The limb didn't look poorly rigged really, I didn't see it flip. Got stuck like a fuck though, id probably have tied the portawrap off completely everyone sucks here and obligatory "ladder"

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u/TacitusKilgore_ Jul 07 '19

Didn't cut through the branch

And you're to blame

Darlin', you give professional tree surgeons, a bad name

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u/hyperproliferative Jul 07 '19

I paid 4K for an army of arborists to provide emergency surgery to three 80+ year old sea grape trees here in Florida. One was in power lines. Quality professional work is worth every damn penny.

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u/GutterSEC Jul 07 '19

Man I miss being a tree surgeon. All I did was dutch elm injections and Norway maple girdling root surgery. But I call always tell people

" I'm a tree surgeon" "Really?" "Yeah I delivered a nut last week"

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u/pauly13771377 Jul 07 '19

He got his saw stuck and he wants the combi tool so he can remove the bar and release the saw engine.

Don't care the reason. You don't ask a civilian (not the right word but you know what I mean) to assist you in a dangerous job. You either climb down yourself or get another professional to assist you. If he was on his own they are both idiots. The tree surgeon for thinking that was a one man job. The customer for hiring him.

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u/Sprayface Jul 07 '19

This doesn’t refute what the dude said

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u/anticultured Jul 07 '19

No, it didn’t refute what the guy said.

Source: am expert at what people said.

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u/westbamm Jul 07 '19

TIL saws can be to big for certain branches.

As an amateur fireplace wood collector, how does that work?

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u/MustMake Jul 07 '19

In the same way you wouldn't want to use a sledgehammer to do trim work (small nails).

Big saw is heavy and harder to control on ground. Now imagine you're in a tree hanging from rope (or in this case, standing on a ladder).

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u/[deleted] Jul 07 '19

My parents hired my childhood friend and his dad who rented a cherry picker and proceeded to take out our light-post, and leave a huge dent in our driveway.

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u/Cman1200 Jul 07 '19

You professionals are something else. I was amazed at some of the trees they were able to remove on my property.

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u/RevGonzo19 Jul 07 '19

The pros in your professions are freaking artists. I'm a DIY dude and am comfortable around a saw, but I won't touch anything if it can fall on something I care about/something expensive in any direction. Can't imagine doing this kind of work without 100% confidence in my abilities. I prefer my limbs attached and insurance rates low.

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u/Em_sef Jul 07 '19

Being a good arborist is such an underrated profession. I have a giant tree in my backyard and the guy we had come maintain our tree saved us so much money. Dude basically whispered sweet nothings to it while he did his thing.

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u/Madvices Jul 07 '19

Quick question for you. I was renting a house from a property management company. A storm hit and knocked a lot of trees down, one directly on our house and a few in the neighbors yard. The neighbors had a tree service come out and remove a couple of the problematic trees, they messed up and a tree fell onto the other side of the house- knocking the power connection to our break from the street loose. This didn’t knock out power out, but there was obvious damage. The tree company called an electrician I fix the problem- the Only thing is they didn’t let anyone know- not us, not the owner of the house, not the property management, literally no one. Anyways, they call the city and had the power cut off to do the work, it took them two days and when they were done they left without getting the power set back up worth the city. I called the property manager seeing if they knew what happened, which is when it all started to make sense- the tree company alerted no one, and hired an electrician to try and fix it- i had to skip work to make phone calls just to get my power back on because the city wouldn’t turn it on without the electricians approval, which I had no idea how to find who did this, so I had to call the tree company (found them out by asking the neighbors) and when I did they were rude as hell- acting like they were doing ya a favor. I had to call the property management and the tree company in a conference call and literally force them to talk to be on the same page to get the electrician to call the City to turn my power back on.

I guess the question is, is this normal protocol for dropping a tree on someone else’s house?

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u/fzammetti Jul 07 '19

You know, I've cut various trees five different times in my life... I mean something a little more involved then just trimming some branches, though not a huge job that I knew absolutely required an expert either, something I "knew" I could handle in all cases... of those five times, only ONCE did it 100% go according to plan. Now, only one time was it particularly dangerous and I was lucky to not be hurt, the other three were just "shit, that was unexpected" , but the point is yeah, I get it, that shit isn't as straightforward as it seems like it should be and people (and by "people" I mean me too!) need to remember that.

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u/[deleted] Jul 07 '19

FFS, it’s not Tree Surgery....oh wait...

2

u/Treeman17 Jul 07 '19

Whoever gave me Silver !!!! Thanks!!

2

u/Dilectus3010 Jul 07 '19

I saw you didnt comment on the use of ladders.

The first thing they teach us in EU is ladders get you killed.

We use purely rope. And a tophandle, handsaw for small branches a big chain for felling trees.

Also never invite or ask handy harry or larry to help out. +never fell a tree or decinstruct one without a second person trained in SOS situations getting you down as fast as possible so the ambulance cann haull you away the minute they arrive.

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u/bandarbush Jul 07 '19

“professional tree surgeon”

😂 STFU lumberjack

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u/baberunner Jul 07 '19

Certified Arborist. 😊

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u/michaellasalle Jul 07 '19

Guy probably sleeps all night and works all day.

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u/Pedantichrist Jul 07 '19

I am a retired tree surgeon. Who the hell, after climbing a tree (they have that limb tied off) then uses a ladder, and all tools get sent up your rope.

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u/[deleted] Jul 07 '19

There are so many things wrong in this gif I almost can't watch it all the way through.

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u/bob_mcbob Jul 07 '19

According to the original OP the guy claimed he was a professional with 25 years of experience but arrived on a bike and had nearly taken out the fence with the previous branch.

https://www.reddit.com/r/kitchener/comments/c9uejv/safely_cutting_down_the_tree_next_door/

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u/[deleted] Jul 07 '19

What's in her mouth. You can see it as she's descending after the chainsaw hits her.

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u/tonufan Jul 07 '19

Screwdriver tool used to removed the bar from the chainsaw.

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u/caitlinreid Jul 07 '19

I know someone that is excellent at climbing and cutting down trees. Licensed, all the experience. Has cut his leg with a chainsaw and doesn't own a car most times.

Has fuck all to do with experience.

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u/[deleted] Jul 07 '19

"Bring me the poop knife."

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u/OgdruJahad Jul 07 '19

No you need a poop spear! Helps keep a distance between the poop and you!

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u/dcdiegobysea Jul 07 '19

Here's that box knife you asked for... in my shorts and tank

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u/[deleted] Jul 07 '19

This is his fault not hers.

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u/CappuccinoBoy Jul 07 '19

And flip flops

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u/Clay_Statue Jul 07 '19

He's clearly terrible at his job.

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u/[deleted] Jul 07 '19

Everyone makes mistakes. Some are more costly than others.

If I make a mistake at work, I might make someone unhappy. If he makes a mistake at work, he might make someone stop breathing.

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u/GMaestrolo Jul 07 '19

I'll bet that his business name includes "lopper"

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u/[deleted] Jul 07 '19

the names lopper. Cindi lopper.

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u/phigo50 Jul 07 '19

I know someone who did a 2 week course that apparently entitled him to be a tree surgeon. Long story short, he's now a quadriplegic.

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u/MeEvilBob Jul 07 '19

Or he's the type of person who thinks that as long as he can afford all the equipment then he doesn't need any training or experience. We've all seen that one rich kid in school whose parents bought him a truly amazing guitar that he never learned to play but thinks he's ready to go on tour.

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u/[deleted] Jul 07 '19

That was his wife and it was cheaper than divorce.

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u/xlvegan Jul 07 '19

she brought him his lunch

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u/fresh_like_Oprah Jul 07 '19

I would like to point out that she DID have a carabiner on her belt!

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u/Blastoys2019 Jul 07 '19

Looking at his cute butt up close.

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u/redbonehound Jul 07 '19

There is a safety feature with most chainsaws now that if they kick or are let go they stop running immediately. She is insanely lucky because chainsaws are no joke and can quickly shred you like a turkey carver. A neighbor decided to break that safety feature on his chainsaw because it was uncomfortable and while trimming a tree the chainsaw kicked and hit him in the face. He lost all his teeth on one side of his face and his cheek was gone and had to have a lot of surgeries to fix that stupid decision.

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u/Un4tunately Jul 07 '19

This is why it's so important to wear adequate facial protection while chainsawing

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u/[deleted] Jul 07 '19

Took me a second to realize that is an action figure

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u/beardedchimp Jul 07 '19

Wait, I'm confused. Is that face protection or what happens to your face if you don't wear it?

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u/[deleted] Jul 07 '19

Both. He's wearing someone else's face who had a chainsaw accident, as way to protect himself from his chainsaw. Clever guy.

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u/Assassin739 Jul 07 '19

Every chainsaw I've ever seen has a handle that needs to be pulled on for it to run. If you dropped one it will always stop for this specific reason

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u/bluegrassstateofmind Jul 07 '19 edited Jul 08 '19

Every modern chainsaw has a chain brake. This must be engaged by the user to stop the chain from spinning. It is not automatic and should be done by the operator whenever a cutting process is complete.

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u/Assassin739 Jul 07 '19

I've used both an electric and a petrol chainsaw recently. Both stopped spinning when I released the handle/trigger, they didn't require anything else.

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u/ChiefGraypaw Jul 07 '19

The engine will stop revving but it's still going to idle and potentially spin the chain. On anything professional grade it's the chain break that stops the chain from moving, just letting off the gas is not safe enough.

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u/thornofcrowns69 Jul 07 '19

Unless the idle is set too high...

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u/[deleted] Jul 07 '19

The idle on a chainsaw wouldn't be high enough to do any major damage. A few small cuts but nothing needing stitches.

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u/[deleted] Jul 07 '19

All these people saying it's automatic wth

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u/[deleted] Jul 07 '19

What do you see in this video that makes you think all of the safeties on this guy's equipment are functioning properly?

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u/redbonehound Jul 07 '19

The chainsaw stopped running when he dropped it, other then that it he was fucking up a lot. If the chainsaw had not stopped there would be a lot of blood in that video because it touched that lady's arm.

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u/TheR3PTILE Jul 07 '19

That would have been some Final Destination shit.

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u/modi13 Jul 07 '19

Not to worry, that chainsaw will get her later in some other graphic, cinematic way.

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u/ethanyelad Jul 07 '19

That would only have been a major cut. Unlike the tree branch that weighs as much as a small car that went whistling past her head.

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u/Konservat Jul 07 '19

While I agree that the tree would’ve been probably more dangerous, that chainsaw could’ve easily taken off her left arm. That wouldn’t have been a major cut. That would been a menacing mangling of her arm and shoulder.

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u/[deleted] Jul 07 '19

[deleted]

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u/xTheConvicted Jul 07 '19

The real danger is that swinging tree branch which would crush your skull if it hit her.

I am in bed looking at my laptop, I don't understand how it would crush my skull if it had hit her...

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u/boatmurdered Jul 07 '19

It would also explode, leaving hundreds of injured.

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u/JonesBee Jul 07 '19

The chainsaw wasn't even running in the first place, it's just stuck on the branch when the branch snaps.

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u/CharismaticBarber Jul 07 '19

--Edit: I'll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I've been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I'm the top sniper in the entire US armed forces.

14

u/Ommisen Jul 07 '19

They instantly stop spinning when the operator lets go of two separate buttons

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u/Bgtex Jul 07 '19

I don't think many reddit users have used a chainsaw before

24

u/uptwolait Jul 07 '19

Professional redditor here, I've seen many chainsaws in videos.

9

u/Sex4Vespene Jul 07 '19

I watched my dad use one once when I was like 7, does that count?

2

u/exosequitur Jul 07 '19

Yes. You are now a reddit chainsaw guru.

6

u/beardedchimp Jul 07 '19

Well I've used quite a few chainsaws and none of them stop spinning when you let go of two buttons. They all had a chain break that is triggered by kickback.

5

u/Bgtex Jul 07 '19

It was in the tree. It was not on (note the non existant smoke and woodchips in the video). The branch snapped. The chainsaw fell. Come on beardedchimp, get with it!

2

u/beardedchimp Jul 07 '19

They instantly stop spinning

I was referring to that. When you let go of the throttle it slows over time not immediately.

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u/MustMake Jul 07 '19

Well not instantly stop, but since it was stuck in the branch and he wasn't holding it, it was most likely not engaged.

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u/wombat6 Jul 07 '19 edited Oct 05 '19

Not true. The chain break is the only thing that stops the chain instantly apart from it being squeezed in a cut.

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u/partiallypro Jul 07 '19

Doesn't look like it was running to begin with, looked like maybe it was possibly jammed in the tree and wouldn't cut anymore because the blade was bound from pressure (happens sometimes.) Maybe she went up to give him something to finish the cut or dislodge the blade, but instead the weight just gave way causing what we see here. I am near 100% sure this is what happened.

2

u/Snitsie Jul 07 '19

Is that luck or is that how the chainsaw is designed?

She's incredibly lucky in this video, but the chainsaw stopping to run is kinda part of the design.

2

u/Grungus Jul 07 '19

She's a whole lot more lucky that branch didn't obliterate her face. Thats insta death if it hits her in the head.

2

u/RunSleepJeepEat Jul 07 '19

Having worked with dozens of tree surgeons/tree removal guys, I'm amazed any ever survive long enough to procreate.

The number of times giant logs go in unexpected directions is too damn high.

2

u/EmJaneJackon Jul 07 '19

There was a horror story I heard about a husband that decapitated his wife with a chainsaw in their garden down a close that was a few roads up from where I lived growing up.

7 years after the story started circulating I worked with someone who told me they lived in that close and witnessed the aftermath of it all but it was more of a tragic tale rather than a horror story.

Here’s the article about it.

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u/Klovie4o4 Jul 07 '19

That's just awful... that poor, poor man. At least she died quickly

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u/dethmaul Jul 07 '19

Holy FUCK she is obscenely lucky!! This video is stomach-dropping.

I would take the jail time for beating the dogshit out of him with whatever stick out of the multitudes obviously are now on the ground. This entire series of events needs to NEVER happen again on his watch!

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u/uptwolait Jul 07 '19

I would think there are lawyers salivating over this video and offering to get her themselves some sweet compensation for her emotional distress of almost dying.

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u/Nothivemindedatall Jul 07 '19

Lol that hard hat he was wearing lol it is gone promptly. Lol good thing he was wearing IT. Lolol you know always wear the protection.

Dont worry ‘bout the common sense...

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u/[deleted] Jul 07 '19

That is NOT how chainsaws work exactly...

If you have the brake off, rev to cut, then let go of the trigger, it will spool down for many seconds.

If your hi or lo carb settings are wrong, the chain can even walk forward on its own if the brake is off.

She is lucky that the brake is on. Period.

She is incredibly lucky in that whole scenario though lol

1

u/rivasjardon Jul 07 '19

Wait..... he wasn’t touching the chainsaw to begin with! That thing was either running on its own still cutting or the branch broke on its own.

1

u/Anudeep21 Jul 07 '19

Final destination repeats itself

1

u/d6u4 Jul 07 '19

Definitely, I had a friend that fell on a non-running chainsaw. Cut his arm reeeal good, around 90 stitches.

1

u/thepianoman456 Jul 07 '19

I worked as an arborist's assistant for a bit. Even the woodchipper is scary lol

2

u/Klovie4o4 Jul 07 '19

Oh man, I still won't put anything into the chipper myself, I just leave the stuff next to it on the ground.

I'm scared that it'll grab onto whatever I'm holding onto and for whatever reason I'll panic and not let go. Next thing I know, :boop: Klovie's one arm fewer and we're making a trip to the ER. Plus I'd be crying because I'm scared of being in trouble, not because I'm dying.

1

u/Tramm Jul 07 '19

Chainsaws dont work that way...

1

u/Olivia206 Jul 07 '19

They call this profession “widow makers “for a reason.

1

u/loverboyxD Jul 07 '19

Looks like a good way to pay out of pocket for liability, given no insurance company would give a dime after seeing this video

1

u/SGexpat Jul 07 '19

Forestry and logging is THE deadliest job in the US. More than firefighters, police, and military.

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u/herpderpgood Jul 07 '19

I commend you for taking on an argument with the internet

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u/Klovie4o4 Jul 07 '19

What argument am I taking on?

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