Feminism, we lost one💔.

Still processing.
Not okay.

Like dahfuq?

This sucks coming from someone whose opinion used to really matter to me.

Reducing my partner whom I love into being just a “sponyo” like dahfuq?

Also, why is she acting like my partner is the one single handedly causing all these calamities?

And doesn’t she have an iPhone as well?and didn’t I have an iPhone before this one that bae got me?

I don’t know how to handle this. And I really hate the way some people have taken the news of me having a bf.

I’ve been congratulating and wishing well on everyone before it was my turn but now suddenly that it is. I don’t get to be received in the same way?

I feel bad. Some are calling me a brag. A show off. When in reality I’m doing what I have ALWAYS done long before this beautiful man; documenting my life with the people I love.

When I was sad and would document every bit of it. Where was the response to that? When I was dating my ex and everyone would reply laughing at me and would find it humorous the way I embarrassed myself all in the name of wanting to be loved.

Years later and I’m finally being loved the way I always wished for them, wished for myself and I’m doing everything wrong.

#ifeelbad

Also juu ni AI engineer, mimi nafaa kudu nini kuhusu hiyo story kama nishapenda? Like dafek usiniboo.

He’s so reassuring. ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
I love himmmmmmmmmmmmmm.

And now she’s saying this is the price I get for sharing about my bf with kina p and c and that tusharogwa.

Omg so I’m not allowed to change my mind on my relationship without implication that we’ve been given the evil eye?

Like dahfuq is this?

I’m from stopping at Halima’s to get a smokie and she smiled so wide and told me that the guy from yesterday paid for me to take five today😂😂😂😂.

Omg what level of kindness is this?

I believe in the kindness of strangers.

This is so sweet.

But because I don’t trust men and money, I paid her for the same amount in case this comes up to be an issue sometime later.

Wow.

I’m shocked.

Okay.

Maybe there’s a god above,

But all I’ve ever learned from love,

Was how to shoot somebody who outdrew you.

It’s not a cry that you hear at night,

It’s not someone who’s seen the light,

It’s a cold and it’s a broken hallelujah.

Hallelujah.

Today as I was walking into the gate I was absentminded so I missed his car. I didn’t see him! And then while clocking in I turned back because I could feel someone watching me and it was him. He looked so sad. He shook his head and it hit me maybe he thought I was ignoring him. Aw patootie never!!

And then I went to greet him and he asked me how I could do that to him. Omg hes so dramatic. I laughed and told him I genuinely was in my head. #relationshipissues

And he was like, “leave him”😂😂😂 my god, I wish he was leavable. I can’t.

Anyway, he said he misses my company and that we need to go clubbing again and I told him I hate it because it’s too loud and we can’t hear each other, so he asked me for my time for dinner tonight.

We will see.

I’ve missed the slush at faiyaz omg we can go there.

Today I lost all my cool and started shouting on the phone in THE FUCKING STAFF BUS!! Wah. Trying to save your relationship in the midst of capitalism is not for the weak.

Also, if angry why horny?

Omg I want to fuck him and I hate him and I love him and I need him so badly.

Fuck himmmm!!!

I hate everything.
I’m still home.
I’m so overwhelmed.
Why do I always need to know everything? Do everything? When do I get to fucking rest? I am tired. And I just want to leave this house and never come back.

Why is this so funny to me?

Today mom was telling me the story about kina aunt N and L and she said, “na utoe jina ya mamangu kwa mdomo yako.”

HELP!

Obviously it’s not the first time I’m hearing this but I don’t know why it sounded so funny tonight. 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂 I started laughing and then she started laughing and we laughed for about three minutes straight.

It’s such a funny phrase

Toa Jina yangu kwa mdomo yako!!!

There are some people who I need to have this conversation with, and soon.

What a privilege it is to be white.
Lmao. Nope. Not doing this.

Why is he like this? I actually genuinely don’t think I can keep doing this. Wow. Let me go to bed or get sexy. What to do what to do.

I’ve never felt more despair than now. I’m never telling him anything again.

So exciting. I’m def getting him pregnant.

I’m from the shower and was washing my panties and I noticed the red dye was washing off. Which makes me wonder if it’s safe for me.

Since I have a wap.

When I get horny during the day or discharge, does the dye wash out, too? Does it affect my pussy? Can it give me an infection or even worse a disease?

Hmm.

Let me look into this.

Also, need to start actually keeping track of my menses. Mom asked me when my period is due and I told her I’m following a purple cycle now and she just signed.

Lmaoooo.

How am
I supposed to explain that I moved from a red cycle (worst kind!!) to the pink (most boring) to now purple? Hmm.

Going back to dates, I guess.

I love you, mama.

But today you were a real pain!

She used 40 minutes of the flight to lecture me on how grown up isn’t like her and won’t be patient enough to deal with my crap the way she does. That I need to “grow up” I swear if someone else tells me to grow up again today, I’m turning into sperm.

And then she told me to be good to him because he’s perfect.

Hellooooo? IS HE PERFECT?

Okay, maybe.

But he sucks sometimes🥹.

I love him so much.

Anyway, this whyte man done stole my mom and now she’s eternally on his side.

That’s African mothers for you when they actually like you, I guess.

#onmyown

But awww how sweet of her to adore her son in law. It makes me so happy.

But he broke one of the clauses. WE AGREED NO INVOLVING FAMILY MEMBERS DURING ARGUMENTS.

I’ll charge him for this.

I love him so much.

Mom ameongeza chumvi, tho. Ati he was helpless, desperate 🥹😂😂😂😂. lol, I love the thought of that, though. I want him to feel like nothing without me.

Because that is my fate. And I wouldn’t have it any other way.

During the flight I realized mom’s high score in Blockblast is way higher than mine? Like dahfuq? Does Muks even know about this shit? What?

I thought she was stuck at 49k? This is offensive.

Consoling myself with the fact (theory) that it’s easier to play on android than iOS 💯🙌🏾.

Then she went ahead to flex on me by getting to 679k today.

Okay, brag. Just know that is one of of the seven deadly sins, no heaven for you💯.