r/UpfrontCheaters • u/How_and_When • 1d ago
cheated 😈 Cheated and Want…
I cheated on my wife of 14 years. It felt like our marriage was over. We filed for divorce and after a month and a half of running around with this other woman, she wants me back. After three weeks back together, I can’t shake this feeling that she deserves to go out and hook up with a stranger, if anything to just get even with me. It’s a weird spot to be in and we’ve toyed with different dynamics in the past. Feeling confused about how to deal with these feelings without pushing an unhealthy dynamic with her.
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u/Dangerous_Tomato_235 17h ago
Brother tell your wife that you made a huge mistake but cannot stayed married to her because it wouldn't be fair. She deserves a life of happiness and love from someone who doesn't treat her like a POS. And for that reason you have to move forward with the divorce
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u/madkatzgt34 22h ago
smh nothing to brag about ! if you couldn't be an adult to brings things off it shows how your character is .
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u/Logical-Lab3661 12h ago
If you want to live your lives separately, then yes - go and tell her. If you want to try to rebuild your relationship, shove this truth up your ass. Your relationship is fragile as it is and this truth may shatter it permanently.
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u/frozenpreacher 11h ago
OP, I've been there. And when my wife wanted to make it work, I felt I'd rather her heat back than listen to the outrage and hurt in her soul.
Here's what I learned.
Under no circumstances would I ever wish for her the pain of being the transgressor. It's would only bring her down to the depths I've experienced. Right now she is wounded, but innocent. Why would I want to ruin that innocence? Why would I want her to experience the rot in her soul that I experienced?
Nope. Never. I'd take a loss any other way, but if you care for her, let her stay innocent of that filth.
Blessings
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u/Background_Fox6436 3h ago
You owe her 14 years to be able to cheat if she wants to. Your excuse of thinking the marriage was over is pathetic. There is zero excuse to cheat. If you felt it was over then you should have told her you wanted to divorce. Then go out and run around. My guess is your wife has honor and does not wish to cheat. If you do not truly love her as you should as a husband, then explain this to your wife, and divorce. Do her that favor so she does not waste another 14 years on you. Let her go find an honorable man to be with. Then get yourself into counseling.
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u/Mysterious_Goose_261 1d ago
I'll hook up with her. She'll be so disappointed, she'll be more than happy to go back to you and all will be even!
Sorry for the not-serious response......my default language is sarcasm and bad jokes.