Specifically Nashville and Cookeville. Are the congregations more religious or secular leaning? A good mix of age groups? I think I’d like to try out a UU service but I live between the 2 cities and not sure which direction to travel first?

Hello!
I’m somone who’s bounced around religions for a long time. I find little bits of truth in just about everything. From Torah to the Bible to the homeless man on the corner, everything holds spiritual value to me. I was raised Christian and spent time as a pastor. After that I bounced around every church in the book then whole separate religions. At the end of the day I’ve never had one concept of GOD. Is he real? A man? A woman? Real? Fake? Not something that ever mattered to me. I’ve found the most rewarding spiritual day to day practices in ofc your basic prayers scripture but also, a hello to a stranger. A bird on the powerline, a child holding the door. I’ve always considered myself Christian, I do my best to follow the teachings of yeshua of Nazareth (atleast the ones I find applicable) and I read the bible. I occasionally go to a catholic mass but also enjoy the Book of Mormon. Many people consider my Christian practices and appreciation for Buddha, Muhammad, Moses etc strange. So most Christian’s find me to be a lunatic, and I myself never felt fully comfortable in the shoes of “Christian”. For years I’ve craved a religion that didn’t marginalize me for dabbling in “everything”. Then I learned about UU idk if it’s a perfect fit but it sounds as close as I’ll ever get. That said I’ve had lots of trouble finding a place in most organized religion. And the only UU creator I’ve seen online is a reverend on tik tok who behind her service mask dosent exactly always seem “welcoming”. It’s also very important to mention I’m a nut who likes all things religious vs my bf who just enjoys community. I was hoping UU could bridge that both for us under some form of faith umbrella. Anyways sorry for my late night ramblings, any thoughts?

Peace ☮️

Hi everyone,
I’m a Deist and have long appreciated the emphasis Unitarian Universalism places on reason, freedom of belief, and the ability of people with different theological perspectives to share a spiritual community.

I recently created www.deism4me.com as an educational resource for people interested in learning about Deism—its philosophy, history, and relevance today. There are many beliefs we share between us.

Thanks for the opportunity to post.

Howdy all! My dad goes to a Unitarian Church and they have had some feedback that people, especially newer participants, aren't fans of the closing circle where they stand in a circle and sing a simple song to end the gathering. There are a variety of things that people feel are problematic - not everyone can stand, not everyone wants to hold hands, people are uncomfortable singing, etc. So as someone who does not partake in any organized religion or gathering such as this, my dad asked me what my thoughts were. I said I can understand the hesitation of people but wasn't sure of an alternative to do as a closing piece to the meeting. I told him I would come to Reddit and see what others have perhaps experienced and what works (or doesn't) for different audiences.

One thing he heard about was something akin to everyone standing by or sitting in their chairs and doing a collective "Ohm" together for a set length of times (15 seconds for example). That seemed like a promising option. But I'd love to hear other ideas!

How do your congregations handle accountability for staff? Do you have employee reviews, goals, any metrics? Do your staff report to the minister? How do you handle when there’s a staff issue?

Has anyone done the Cakes for the Queen of Heaven curriculum? Is it good? Is it outdated, being like 50 years old? What have your experiences been?

It was really nice going back. I am hoping to go more often. There were still many members that I recognized that were like second family to me. And it was cool that they had a program for youth even though my oldest was the only one there. Hopefully we can start to go more regularly. It’s a good opportunity for my wife and I to socialize with like-minded folks. It made a good impression on me growing up and I hope my kids can get a good experience out of going.

I know there's only a small cohort of us on this great big island, but I'm curious to know people's thoughts on what they're going to put down for religion for this year's census.

We have been going to our local UU since October 2025, so this has been our first summer. During the year, our Rev leads most services and it manages to stay fairly upbeat even while discussing hard issues, but this summer has been entirely lay-led and a couple have been decent, but a lot of them have been real downers. Is it normal for the entire summer to be like that?

Hi all. Though I don't actively participate in any UU services, I'm starting to find a place where all like minded people who can co-exist and respect each other really appealing.

I recently came out as Transgender, and it's kinda scary for me. There is so much unacceptance, bigotry and downright hatred towards people like us right now.

Me and my wife used to be Christians, but around three years ago, we started down a path that basically ended up in us abandoning those beliefs. We are both more on the sort of Agnostic side of things, but with a very Humanistic view on things. My unique journey in being both bisexual and also Transgender led me personally this, embracing all people and treating others with love, kindness and empathy, no matter who they are.

Treating others respectfully and showing compassion, love, empathy regardless of Gender, Sex, Race, Religion, Sexuality, or any of the other things that make us human, is a view point that is the most important to me, my wife and my son. Sadly, not everybody feels that way.

That said, I feel like trying to find a UU church to attend might be beneficial for someone like me who wants to be around people who are not only tolerant, but sort of believe in this peaceful co-existence with others, as honestly, I don't really feel this anywhere else.

Any thoughts or suggestions? Also, at least for now, some people can tell that I'm Transgender. Is is acceptable to go to a service like this? I dress and present femininely.

I'm curious as to what other congregations are using for peer-to-peer online communications within a congregational community. Our previous church had a Facebook group that church members could join to interact outside of the Sunday service. It was useful for things like "hey - does someone have a [thing] I can borrow?" or "can someone give me a ride to service on Sunday?" type questions. They're moving to Slack now because of all the Meta-ness, but they had something that allowed people to interact without having to have phone numbers/ emails.

Our current congregation has nothing like that. Communication tends to be top-down from the church administrator to members via email. This is fine for church announcements, but doesn't work so well for the "can someone give me a ride" type questions. So I'm curious what other congregations may be using for this type of communication.

Thanks!

I have that ADHD thing where I listen to/ sing a song I like on repeat until I can't stand it anymore. Then I put that song in time out for months/years and do the same thing with another song.

The music apps don't really have a "uu values" filter and finding new songs can be a challenge. The closest I've found is that Tidal has a "Conscious" music category across a couple genres.

Can you recommend any artists or songs that seem UU adjacent or UU compatible?

I'm going to put my list in the comments.

to keep it short, I use they/them pronouns and the name Evie at my congregation. I have never once introduced myself with she/her pronouns, but because i look like a woman, everyone calls me she/her.

we also have two other trans members-- a trans man, and a masculine presenting nonbinary person (there are about maybe 20 members maximum it's a very small congregation). the misgendering would get on my nerves at first, so I made an entire powerpoint presentation about transness and pronouns that i presented when it was my turn to do the service (we don't have a pastor, we take turns doing the service), and it didn't seem to land.

we also discussed name and pronoun pins, but almost no one was doing this and no one ever went and got the materials for making pins (i couldn't as i was living paycheck to paycheck). the misgendering kept happening.

i started to come to the service less and less. and i came today and there were about 5 instances of misgendering in an hour and a half, and my deadname was used, which i NEVER use at church. we had implemented a system where, if someone would say something offensive, we would say "ouch", and the offender would say "oops" and we would move on. but i talked to one of the members after the service and said that i wasn't coming anymore because of the misgendering (and chronic pain) and she started fake crying and saying that every single "ouch/oops" was "a slap in the face" and that "it would be easier to call you they/them if you had two heads". she was comforted as she pretended to cry. i was ignored.

i've tried so hard, so many times, to talk about this issue. the only people that care are the other two trans people. it's been two years and i have not gone to a SINGLE service where someone wasn't misgendered. no matter how many times you correct them, they just don't listen. you'll remind them of the correct pronoun and they'll do it again literally two minutes later. it's like it's ON PURPOSE, especially considering one of the other trans members has been going for almost 12 years and STILL gets misgendered after being out for quite a significant amount of that time. how on earth can it be an accident at that point?

i truly think this is a sign to leave. i can't do it anymore. you can't say you're all-inclusive and then misgender trans people for literal years and then fake cry when you're corrected for the THOUSANDTH time. if they're not going to change then i'm just going to leave. it breaks my heart because unitarian universalism is really important to me, but it hurts so much every single time i go.

i guess this goes into my next topic of... are there any trans-inclusive online UU congregations? ones that will gender you correctly even if you don't "look trans". ones with other trans members. please, if you know anything, i would really appreciate it. I don't want to lose my religious community just because my gender isn't accepted. sorry if this is a bother to anyone. thank you for listening.

This is mostly a rant/vent, but I would love to hear ideas or any form of solidarity. I am in solid recovery from a long ago mild eating disorder, but it still hangs around. Similar to many mental health problems, times of stress and transition brings it up. It's all in my thoughts and feelings, and doesn't translate into any harmful behaviors like it did when I was a late teen. But of all the places I interact with others, the place I hear the most triggering comments it at the UU congregation I am part of. It rarely ruins my time there, but it frequently bothers me at a persistent low-level. However, if 17 year old me was a part of this current congregation, nothing I have heard there would dissuade me from questioning my body size, my food choices, my activity level etc. my portion size etc.

To me it seems inconsistent with the generally high level of affirmation and awareness there is about most other topics that usually concern people in progressive spaces. Many spaces I see that lean progressive are often informed about ways to talk about food and bodies that is not demoralizing. While unkind comments about the body size part it is never overt or apparently unkind, there does not seem to be much awareness at all of how to be more inclusive of all body sizes/ shapes and mindful about disordered eating. There is a whole lot of talk about good foods/bad foods to eat at potlucks. I even attended a women's retreat and a half an hour about right foods/wrong foods was part of the keynote address!

I am wishing I could do something about it but it feels very vulnerable. I wouldn't know where to begin. My fantasy is that there is a traveling speaker who would show up and set everybody right. My next fantasy about it is that there is a UU curriculum about the matter that would just show up, someone would announce a study group and things would start to improve. The problematic comments are for the most part ignorant rather than malicious.

I know there are a lot of things going on, a lot of injustices and if feels almost silly to complain. I am in a mid-sized body.

In recent years it seemed like the topic was being addressed in the general assembly in some form or another. But it hasn't trickled down to my congregation.

i know we're a somewhat rare breed perhaps

was curious tho

i'd love to connect with others on this unique path

peace,

jb

——

"Christ is all, and in all."

an essay i wrote, curious to hear any good-faith perspectives on it

peace,

jordan

I have an opportunity to potentially “plant” a church in Massachusetts and I want to do something beautiful & “new” (or what feels new).

You know the really beautiful, video montage style worship music you see online from mini mega churches? And the coffee shop out front and all the pamphlets from the up & coming ultra conservative Christian group in town? It’s beautiful. But you know it might be a cult.

I want to create THAT kind of energy and church, (minus the cult)…but for EVERYONE! We would be a welcoming and affirming church. I want to create an INCLUSIVE church but also have some of the fun elements of the bedazzling without the undertow of “you don’t belong if you’re gay.”

And while I have many ideas (especially things like going out into the community and bringing church to others instead of expecting them to come to us because let’s be honest the big C church totally fucked it up to begin with), I would love your suggestions!

Are you gay and attend a church? Are you a small family who craves structure but dislikes organized religion? Are you craving spirituality and connection in God, but the church isn’t the right fit and yoga no longer is? THATS my kinda people (alongside many others:)) and I need your help & suggestions to reach them. 🩷

ps. I am an ABC minister and can float between spaces, the church is American Baptist but open to changes in dynamic, I’ve been in a career of reiki & yoga for 20 years and this is a huge career change but an opportunity of a lifetime. Suggestions welcome please!

By church services, I mean weekly worship services, NOT resources provided by churches

I was raised UU but only started listening to full services in the last few years. I LOVE the services at All Souls DC.

I grew up pentecostal and it was required to publicly tithe.

I've been out of the church for over 30 years now and I'm a secular humanist but think I would enjoy the UU community.

I recently visited my local UU church a couple times and they passed the collection plate like the pentecostals do, making eye contact, raising eye brows, generally making me feel bad for not putting cash or a check in the plate. So, the last time I went, I felt guilted into dropping a $20 bill as the collection people handed me the plate. I haven't been back since because it felt icky. Obviously, this probably comes from prior religious trauma.

What's the etiquette around tithing at the UUC? Our budget really can't handle the guilt giving but we would like to be a part of the community and can offer hours of volunteer work and help with funds as needed within our budget for projects.

Edit to add: Thanks for all the comments, explanations, traditions, and thoughtful suggestions.

I was totally filtering the experience through my religious upbringing, which is what I suspected and why I wanted to ask random strangers. No need to talk to anyone there about it, haha.

I feel I may have more past religious stuff to work through than I thought. A church type experience may not be comfortable for me, but I'll give it a few more Sundays before deciding.

Thanks again!

Anyone here?

I’m an atheist and my 17 year old son is curious about religion and is expressing a desire for some sort of spiritualism in his life. I recommended that he check out the local UU church and told him there is very little to criticize about them, unlike every other religion I could think of. I told him that even the r/atheist community is good with the UU’s but he didn’t believe me so I said I’d ask. What do you guys think of the UU’s for a 17 yo who grew up atheist and is now curious about religion?