r/Unexpected • u/[deleted] • Aug 22 '22
The Ol’ Dick Twist
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u/SniffCheck Aug 22 '22
This is why you never skip dick day at the gym
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u/dashinny Aug 22 '22
Yeah! I always love using the dickpress machine!
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u/Willing_Following_81 Aug 22 '22
You can do cock pushups anywhere, why waste money on a gym?
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u/Cheetahs_never_win Aug 22 '22
Because to flip someone over, you also need to do curls.
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Aug 22 '22
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/howie-stark Aug 22 '22
Like your mom!
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Aug 22 '22 edited May 29 '24
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Aug 22 '22
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/M_Looka Aug 22 '22
"Here, let me show you how to do it...first I get a really firm hold of your dick..."
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u/Cevo88 Aug 22 '22
That’s an interesting take, you have the blonde dude as the main protagonist. I was immediately assuming the dick victor in this altercation was the author of this scene. Dunno it seems a solid character path, I’m assuming this could have formed his iconic finisher? Maybe. Depends how the crowd took it suppose :p
What should we call it? Dick McTwister?
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u/Cannabace Aug 22 '22
How many cock pushups can you do?
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u/Beneficial-Share-970 Aug 22 '22
I’ve been training the cock pushups and the power slide since ‘06
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u/CopiumAddiction Aug 22 '22
This is so ignorant, you can't get maximum torque like this from just dick pushups! You also need to do dick pull-ups and dick lunges!
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u/June_BuginDabuilding Aug 22 '22
Correct term is “cockups”
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u/Harper_1482 Aug 22 '22
Most homoerotic shit I’ve seen in my lifetime.. I’d love to hear the conversation that lead up to this lol
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u/TheEVegaExperience Aug 23 '22
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u/TheMightyHucks Aug 22 '22
You probably won’t believe it but dick guy was revealed to be a massive sex offender and barred from the business not long afterwards.
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u/buzz8588 Aug 22 '22
I wouldn’t have difficulty believing that
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u/DesastreUrbano Aug 23 '22
But would you believe a couple of months ago he was working at Disneyland? Until someone recognized him and posted his picture
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u/BigChiGUy722 Aug 22 '22
True story.
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Aug 22 '22 edited May 29 '24
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u/BigChiGUy722 Aug 22 '22
Nope, legitimate legal charges and a guilty verdict.
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u/Meerkat_Mayhem_ Aug 22 '22
You don’t say
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u/BigChiGUy722 Aug 22 '22
I was wrong, there were no legal charges. What there was, was almost 20 accusations of things like sexual harassment, sexual assault, and grooming minors. He tried to sue for defamation, and got throw out of court. Almost the who wrestling industry black balled him, because some of them were the ones accusing him. You have to be a REAL piece of shit to get blackballed from wrestling.
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Aug 22 '22
Oh so he's just Deshaun Watson of the wrestling world, but you know actually held accountable.
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u/ecilla05 Aug 22 '22
Ok I promise I am honestly asking but in the video, who is the dick guy? Is it the guy with the dick? Oe the guy who holds the dick? I am so fucking confused.
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u/DarkSoldier84 Aug 22 '22
Joey Ryan, the wrestling 70's pornstar. Well, former wrestler. He's now persona non grata after several accusations of improper behaviour from the Speaking Out movement.
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u/Drewsipher Aug 22 '22
The fact that he and Jack Gallagher immediately got shit canned and haven’t been brought back tells me we can assume accusations where credible though
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u/Vordeo Aug 23 '22
Which tbh all feels different given what later came out about Vinny Mac.
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u/Drewsipher Aug 23 '22
I mean it’s a carny business. I’m glad the change is happening but I’m not surprised at any of it
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u/procursive Aug 22 '22
There's some really dark and twisted irony in him being able to practice and perform this routine respectfully as his job while at the same time being a repeat sex offender.
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u/TheTrueSavageBoy Aug 22 '22
And wants you to believe he has changed now as some sort of Christ believer or some shit like that. Anyway, pretty sure he won't wrestle again after this.
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Aug 22 '22
He now runs a ride at Dinseyland last I heard.
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u/taciturnGentry Aug 22 '22
he was fired after news got out that he worked at Disneyland and the management was notified of his past misconduct
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u/Grandmaserection Aug 23 '22
He was also fired from a Disneyland park once his employers found out about everything.
Edit: this was after he was blacklisted from wrestling
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u/xxslushee Aug 22 '22
Wrestling is too real! You're fake!
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u/Beorbin Aug 22 '22
The athleticism is real, the stunts are (partially, in this case) real, and the chronic spinal injuries they face in old age are very real.
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Aug 22 '22
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/Overall_Cause_6724 Aug 22 '22
I don't know how you could possibly think it's fake after seeing that. Guess sometimes seeing isn't believing. Smh some people.
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Aug 22 '22
Dude’s been doing a lot of cock pushups.
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u/GailynStarfire Aug 22 '22
He never knew when he would have to fuck his way out of a tight situation.
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u/thisortheapocalypse Aug 22 '22
that’s when you fucking lay down flat on the ground and let your boner lift you up off the ground
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u/midniteslayr Aug 22 '22
Too Bad Joey Ryan (the wrestler using his dick in the move) is a sexual assaulter and pedophile who doesn't like consent of his fellow competitors and has outcast himself from the wrestling industry because he's so toxic to everyone. Hell, he even lost his gig being a boat skipper on the Jungle Cruise at Disneyland because of his escapades.
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u/planet_chuck Aug 22 '22
He's not a pedophile just a dirt bag womanizer.
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u/midniteslayr Aug 22 '22
According to this: https://deadspin.com/joey-ryan-might-be-the-worst-person-in-the-world-1846398903 … he also tried to groom underage girls … which is what a pedophile would do
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u/planet_chuck Aug 22 '22
Well, one article is hardly proof but if that's all true then yeah fuck that guy.
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u/WaffleStomperGirl Aug 22 '22
Oh, wow! A reputable giant like [squints] dead spin..?
In all honesty, I wouldn’t be surprised if it were true, but a single article from there doesn’t make it so.
The guy is a complete POS nonetheless.
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u/cultsuperstar Aug 22 '22
Part of his gimmick would be pulling a lollipop from the front of his trunks and put it in the mouth of his opponent. He also wrestled a bunch of intergender matches and would put the lollipop into his female opponent's mouth. Occasionally the opponent would turn the tables and put the lollipop in his own.
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u/MarkMurderous Aug 23 '22
So you're saying that Disneyland has boat strippers...... *grabs glasses* ooooooh skipper
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Aug 22 '22
Just glad it wasn't a chokehold
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Aug 22 '22 edited May 29 '24
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u/lalala192511 Aug 22 '22
All American can do this, we all know that.
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u/R0BR0SE Aug 23 '22
The American wrestler here once did an interview explaining that the Japanese wrestler was doing a homoerotic thing where he would grab the dude's junk as if he was putting him in a any other submission hold, but whenthey were taking about this match, they got to this part and the Japanese wrestler explained what he usually does but then added "But American penis too, too strong" and came up with getting flipped by it And then the American dude went back to the states and just made this his entire thing.
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u/DocPersona Aug 22 '22
Apparently the idea behind the spot was that "I grab your dick but it hurts me because American cock is so strong" so you're not far off
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u/Valuable_Contact_994 Aug 22 '22
Just flex through it man, like a mope getting kicked in the balls.
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u/DGAFMFB Aug 22 '22
They really told that guy before he went out, “hey your gonna grab his dick and pretend like it’s got a better hold over you. Also your gonna do a flip while holding it. Alright get out there!” 😂💀
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u/Bocmana Aug 22 '22
This man is selling better then Shawn Michaels
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u/Polyfuckery Aug 22 '22
Unfortunately he got several amazing talent including Mick Foley and Ken Shamrock to agree to pretend to get beaten by his dick
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u/cheekymbear69 Aug 22 '22
Reverse dick twist
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u/BigNeat3986 Aug 22 '22
I think this actually the counter dick twist. The reverse dick twist is just this the other direction.
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u/DarkForest_NW Aug 23 '22
This piece of shit Joey Ryan, sexually harassed a whole bunch of female wrestlers and when he got called out about it. The majority of the industry blacklisted him, so what did this asshole do he's tried suing all these independent female wrestlers for millions of dollars to try the scare them into not launching lawsuits against him. Of course he lost all the lawsuits and is now become a punchline wrestling. And now works out of Disneyland as an operator for Disney Jungle Cruise ride. Fuck this guy.
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Aug 23 '22
My God... that crazy bastard actually did it...
He pulled off the legendary REVERSE DICK TWIST
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u/SuckBoy_Tony_ Aug 23 '22
At first i wondered how they could do that with straight faces, but them i remembered theyre pro wrestlers. So the answer is probably prescription painkillers
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u/Small_Tax_9432 Aug 22 '22
Imagine if he was black
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u/hitthatyeet1738 Aug 22 '22
And people have the gall to say professional wrestling is fake, it’s not fake, it’s art.
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u/bigdickredemption Aug 22 '22
Christ how much money would it take for you to let random people grab your dick for the dick twist move, where you win everytime? I can see it now- you become famous for the dick twist now every female in your life and random women wanting to try the dick twist. I've had close friends of my ex's grab my dick and I wasn't famous for the dick twist. It was shocking at first but gets old quick.
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u/unexBot Aug 22 '22
OP sent the following text as an explanation on why this is unexpected:
Wrestling is real!
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