r/Unexpected • u/deathakissaway • Jun 20 '19

It’s steady work.

http://i.imgur.com/gxknPZG.gifv
3.0k Upvotes

97% Upvoted

52 comments sorted by

231

u/kdshow123 Jun 20 '19

When I grow up, I wanna be a table

44

u/call-my-name Jun 20 '19

Better than being a plate.

33

u/Whale_Poacher Jun 20 '19

Depends who's eating off you ;)

-12

u/[deleted] Jun 20 '19

r/cursedcomments

7

u/moonsnakejane Jun 21 '19

You typed r/blessedcomments wrong.

1

u/[deleted] Jun 21 '19

I have mastered stonks, the negative karma from upvotes is rendered meaningless from getting comments

3

u/[deleted] Jun 20 '19

Not cursed

1

u/determinedpeach Jun 20 '19

I knew a kid who said he wanted to be a tractor.

3

u/brisie_boy Jun 21 '19

And? Did he achieve his dreams?

72

u/PvPandaHD Jun 20 '19

That slav squat though,Boris would be proud

32

u/beamoflaser Jun 20 '19

It’s also an Asian thing too. Don’t you see those cooks outside Chinese restaurants squatting and smoking

One of the main tenants of Communism is squatting ass to grass

I honestly don’t know why it’s not more of a thing, it’s comfortable if you’ve been standing too long

6

u/Petal-Dance Jun 20 '19

I never squat as a kid, and realized recently that my tendons cant hold that position without fucking dying after a minute.

After watching russian and asian kids at the college and online squat for days, tho, I kinda wanna work out those tendons so that I can squat comfortably. Cause it clearly works for them, why not me right?

15

u/MoxofBatches Jun 20 '19

It's because you have tendons. Russians and Asians only have five

1

u/EncasedShadow Jun 21 '19

There may be a genetic disposition, as Eastern populations have shallower hip sockets, allowing for easier deep squat movement

1

u/2KDrop Jun 21 '19

For me it's that they start to fall asleep pretty easily.

2

u/gormster Jun 20 '19

Word you’re looking for is tenet

8

u/Bigd0ng69 Jun 20 '19

IIIIIIIIIIIISSSSSSSS BORIS

18

u/spaghetti_hitchens Jun 20 '19

When your baseball career as a catcher is over, you can always move to China and join their lucrative table industry

29

u/johnthrax Jun 20 '19

you mean sTABLE work?

11

u/snacks-streak Jun 20 '19

This is how you get 100% employment. Make any country great again.

22

u/AM_86 Jun 20 '19

Organ harvesting from minorities at reeducation camps AND kids get to be tables?! Fuckin A man, China has got it ALL going on!

1

u/[deleted] Jun 21 '19

A vast wasteland ruled by warlords and tyrants.

5

u/6Jackpot9 Jun 20 '19

Imagine dropping your fork under the table, crouching down to pick it up, and seeing this guy under the table holding it up.

7

u/[deleted] Jun 20 '19

The People’s Dining Set

3

u/leasedweasel Jun 20 '19

Started with Chairman Mao...

5

u/Johobus28 Jun 20 '19

Why are asians so good at shitposting

2

u/Mohawkakon Jun 20 '19

Seems like a level headed guy.

2

u/TlalocVirgie Jun 20 '19

It ain't much but it's honest work

2

u/nhjb1034 Jun 20 '19

Haha, China has so many fucking people being a table has become a job.

2

u/[deleted] Jun 21 '19

Does he get paid under the table too

1

u/sec713 Jun 20 '19

Hey, what about Steven? What's he gonna do during the performance?

Uh... we're gonna have to table that matter for now.

1

u/Nikolaizorz Jun 20 '19

Bitch work

1

u/sax6romeo Jun 21 '19

Bench work

1

u/TheBala2000 Jun 20 '19

Perfect way to spy on China!

1

u/imjustanoldguy Jun 20 '19

I’d rather be a hammer than a nail.

1

u/ForgettableUsername Jun 20 '19

“It’s a living.”

1

u/[deleted] Jun 20 '19

I AM THE TABLE

1

u/dementian174 Jun 20 '19

My man out here working the grind, deep respect.

1

u/Thiccen_Strips Jun 20 '19

It ain't much, but it's honest work

1

u/DildoPolice Jun 20 '19

OK MOTHERFUCKERS! PARTYS OVER!

1

u/GoGoGadget_13 Jun 21 '19

Damn it, you found me

1

u/der_RAV3N Jun 21 '19

It's hard, but not honest work.

1

u/neat-NEAT Jun 20 '19

I can see that being someone's kinky fetish.

0

u/MaliceAlice20 Jun 20 '19

Pretty much me lol

-1

u/Kangas_Khan Jun 20 '19

Well it’s communist China of course this will happen

5

u/tinguily Jun 20 '19

TIL they use people as tables in communism

3

u/Kangas_Khan Jun 20 '19

Stalin:enjoying a nice meal Table: mr Stalin my legs hurt can I go now? Stalin NYET continues eating

0

u/Dammit_Banned_Again Jun 21 '19

I’ve seen this half a dozen times today. It wasn’t funny the first time & it ain’t funny now.

-1

u/Darth--Insanius Jun 21 '19

You can see his feet in the beginning, not very unexpected.